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Fukushima
Hey! | This article is an Encyclopedia Dramatica exclusive. This article is only for the discriminating lulz connoisseur. If you have any exclusive drama to add, click here. |
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Back in 2011, an earthquake and tsunami hit Japan, any well-read EDiot is familiar with the drama associate with the Japan Crisis of 2011. Besides effectively ruining Japan's shit everywhere, the drama is nowhere near done. A wall of water got into the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear power plant and collectively fucked up Japan's business forever. For example, if the pool of fuel rods 100 feet above the ground in Unit 4 of Fukushima contains more than 5000 times Hiroshima bombs' worth of cesium-137. In fact this is so bad, Tokyo's soil is contaminated to the level of what would be classified as nuclear waste in the United States. You can imagine the political and economic ramifications of a mass evacuation of the greater Tokyo Area.
A group of retired engineers, nuclear experts, construction workers, and other volunteers have formed an organization called Skilled Veterans Corps for Fukushima (SVCF). Their main objective is simple: sacrifice their bodies so younger workers don't have to be exposed to radiation as the SVCF is commissioned to build a giant pyramid tomb to forever contain the mess that is Fukushima Daiichi—no this isn't a joke. So far this project has accomplished very little because of a corporate media blackout that is being pushed by International Atomic Energy Association (IAEA) and nuclear energy companies in the United States and Japan that don't want you to know that every time we have a meltdown we have to crank out cannon fodder and billions of dollars to compensate the mess. They also don't want you to know that the only way we can even begin to learn about the true costs of nuclear meltdowns is by examining them as they happen—meaning anyone can really be an expert on this issue.
The man with the plan
Yastel Yamada is the co-founder of the SVCF and is currently on a series of tours promoting that political pressure needs to be put on by Japan to send relevant retired specialists and volunteers at the nuclear facility in an attempt to build a giant pyramid tomb. The one in Japan will be much bigger than the piece of shit already built in Chernobyl that will need an additional 1 billion dollars to make it even bigger.
So what is Yastel Yamada's plan?
Well there really isn't a plan. The reality about nuclear meltdowns is all we know about how to deal with meltdowns is based on the previous two nuclear meltdowns, but this lack of knowledge isn't going to be a problem. Every 25 years or so, scientists are going to have new research material to learn more about nuclear meltdowns due to problems resulting from violating the most important rule in real-estate: location, location, location.
Three Mile Island
- The cleanup project lasted from August 1979 - December 1993
- It had a 1 billion dollar cleanup
- 140,000 people were evacuated.
Chernobyl
- Chernobyl released 50-80 million Curies
- 400 times more radiation than Hiroshima
- 350,000 people displaced
- Total number of Chernobyl liquidators was 600,000. 50 to 10,000 of these liquidators have died from the job depending on who you ask.
- The total cost for Chernobyl was 235 billion dollars.
- A new pyramid tomb needs to be built over the current sarcophagus that will cost an estimated 1 billion dollars.
- This new pyramid tomb was suppose to be completed in 2005, but they'll get around to beginning construction eventually.
External Links
- Skilled Veterans Corps for Fukushima English Website
- A Northern California group collecting data
- A rouge group of scientists, engineers, and hackers based in Japan collecting data about hotspots