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Blockland
A successful attempt at creating something with even worse graphics than Minecraft, Blockland is a high-quality FPS made by some hardworking developer known as Badspot. In Blockland, a player can hang out and build cool things with each other! Sadly, it is instead yet another game that tries to replicate Legos making it somewhat the most miserable attempt at creating a Lego sim in existence; unsurprisingly, the quality is equally shitty. The only lulz in Blockland is from the constant arguing and fighting between themselves and another building game known as Roblox, which ends up in inextinguishable flamewars and drama between special needs children.
The only use for Blockland is for keeping America's autistic youth in their place instead of letting them lurk IRL.
Gameplay
Blockland is a multiplayer construction-based game, yet, most servers tend to be RPs, since building things out of legos is liek so mainstream. The youth of the game have so little fun from building, that it usually ends up in them ragequitting from working too hard. The playerbase consists mainly of homoerotic, mentally ill, foul-mouthed underage brats which makes the experience so much more enjoyable than would be. The building-oriented servers tend to be full of 14-year-olds building dickhouses or naked MLP characters. Most servers hosted by the oldfags of the game are usually filled with their friends with massive egos who act out, and believe that they are right to do so because they played the game 2 months before most of the other little kids around. Predictably, most of these people weren't even alive when the game was originally released, so trolling them isn't much of a chore. It's likely that a new player will be shunned incessantly by universally every single blocklander, that they will just play singleplayer, which defeats the purpose of even buying the game in the first place.
An easy way to troll in Blockland is to gain access to administration privileges on a server, usually by being nice to the owner and complimenting him or her frequently. Once you're an admin, permaban everyone when the owner of the server and/or the other admins are AFK. If you do this professionally, you will be met with an excessive amount of lulz and might be able to get your own drama topic on the forum with hundreds of replies!
Notice how all the characters have no legs at all. This was the creator's attempt at making the game original, by making players into cripples.
Servers
There's generally around 100 servers at any given moment for this extreme game, with a wide selection of interesting game modes to keep you occupied, yet, most of them are roleplay servers. Although the select few people who can actually afford a good computer rarely host, if at all, once in a blue moon, the player might run into a somewhat pleasant server. Though this hasn't been recorded since 2008. Most servers are focused upon concurring fads, and as such, the overall quality of the multiplayer experience hastily plummets, resulting in there rarely being any enjoyable servers.
Gamemodes
- Family RP, where the lonely hang out and pretend to be a mother, father, uncle, etc, much like babyfurs do with their so-called families (though without the incest yiff) because they got disowned from their real family for pleasuring themselves to My Little Pony. Most of these players are usually little kids, which can make for a great trolling target.
- Jail RP is a team deathmatch-based minigame where guards must let prisoners out of their cells without letting them escape or get weapons. The mini-game is popular with the intelligent youth who were gullible enough to purchase this game, since it's the only game mode where you actually have to use strategy. Sadly, most of the time on a JailRP server tends to end up being locked in a cell with nothing to do, while guards physically abuse and sodomize prisoners who haven't committed a real crime to begin with.
- City RP is where players must get a job and hastily build ugly shacks to survive frequent shootouts. Most of the time, it's just idiots killing each other and ragequitting.
Original Blockland
Once in a time long past, a busy Badspot was working on the prototype of what would come to be known as Blockland. After countless hours of work, it was finally released in November of that same year. Eventually, it got thousands of players from TSS who proceeded to ruin the game's community. There were many mods for Blockland, and one of the most important modifications was Return to Blockland, which added many necessities and filler content. A major feature of RTB was the Editor Wand which modifies the size and angle of bricks. RTB used to have a large community, but after Blockland was finished and released, most people quit RTB and flocked mindlessly, thus prompting the RTB community to to dissolve. Eventually, an E-Lawyer by the name of Vyper144 came along and made his own forums for the game known as Blockland Central. Due to insufficient cashflow, he attempted to get more cash by telling his 200 member community that they were spastic crybabies, and expected people to give him money. Instead, only a couple people proposed to donate, and eventually no donations were given. Thus, Blockland Central would eventually cease to exist. Years later, it was replaced with another forum called AndoRTB. AndoRTB did not flourish, and only managed to stay alive from the drama caused between GooG, Redninja, Sephiroth, and the 3 other people there. Many RTB players who stayed after the actual game was released would try their hardest to keep the game alive, but they were ultimately unsuccessful.
Nearly a decade after RTB was popular, the post-retail community (who joined years after the game died) still tries to keep it active.
Around the same time RTB started, another mod came to being. TBM, (The Better Mod) a game which was made by a group of script kiddie basement dwellers. Initially, the reaction to TBM was positive, but a script was discovered which would delete AiO content due to AiO stealing files from TBM. After learning the news, Badspot banished TBM from the BL community and brainwashed his fanbase into waging e-war. TBM would only survive for 2 years until a new generation of wannabee-skids came along. This new generation would produce The Orange Block, a game add-on made by a perverted, sexually confused teenager, Dshiznit. The development team consisted of 14 year old script kiddies newfags, who stole code and content from RTB, SFM, AIO, and Retail. The only thing that separates it is the i-gob which lets you save bricks and load them on any other server. The community still exists, but it's mainly full of 11 year old furfags who can't afford 20 bucks to buy the actual game.
It's worth mentioning that there is a project that has been in the works since 2005 called "The Better Game" which was supposed to compete with Retail when it was released in 2007. Instead, Retail was eventually released, but the project was canned. One day, some time in 2009, Cyberprime and some other skidfags decided they'd steal the abandoned project and pretend they were in charge, which prompted the attention of some of the original TBM devs. So far they have been able to create their own minifig model, which they broke, and a malfunctioning start menu! Previously, they have been attempting to get their hands on Torque 3D which was cut from $1500 to only $99![1]
Together, RTB and TBM have constantly been at 'war'; underaged children trying to hurt the feelings of their rivals. Oddly enough, RTBers eventually stopped flaming the homoerotic queens on the other side and got back to their typical infighting. Despite many of the TBMTOBfags being in their 20s now, they still try to ignite flame years later.
Blockland Forums
The Forums are populated by mentally-ill 14-something teenagers with abandonment issues, which prompts constant amounts of butthurt in their minds. The forum has quickly degenerated into a /b/oard, with retards making an appearance in every thread. The forum is run by Badspot, aka 31-year-old Eric Hartman, your average nerd who graduated from Virginia Tech. Despite being in his 30s, he has never mentally progressed past age 15.
The forum has a drama section for retards to cry about other players and to spark flame wars with others. When they aren't up to their typical infighting, they're talking about the creator's babydick and how they would suck it right off him.
The forum has a gallery for the creations made by the many inhabitants of the game. To protect their feelings, Badspot enforced a rule which states that any negative statements about their pixelated, untextured garbage will get that person permanently banned, but starting countless flamewars for no good reason and acting even more queer than Bruno, that.. that's perfectly acceptable.
Gallery of Gayness
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Welcome to Blockland! -
Cho Seung Hui joins a server -
Ban Notice -
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School RP Raid
Drama
The livelihood of the Blockland forums revolve around the Drama Section. The Drama Section is the third most popular board on the forum, aside from Off-Topic and Games, proving that players are nearly three times more interested in anything not related to Blockland. It is also the forum with the highest Reply-to-Thread Ratio, indicating that any one message posted here will undoubtedly result in at least 10 pages of idiots bickering with each other over trivial shit nobody cares about. Case Example
Drama made in Blockland is usually so stale and lifeless that not even the most psychotic freaks who occupy the forums have trouble making a big deal about it. This phenomenon is so problematic, that Badspot made it a bannable offense to make a comment about how you just don't care. Regardless of how prominent this rule is (having a sticky thread all to its self), most drama is so terrible that this rule has claimed many victims who could not restrain themselves from posting a yawn. The people that create the majority of threads are those with massive amounts of unwarranted self importance, bitching about abstract ideas and forum trends that literally couldn't be less important if it didn't even exist at all.
Regardless of how uninteresting the average thread is, with a community as hostile and immature as Blockland's, more than a few people have gone down in flames so bright they deserve to have their failures cataloged here for all eternity, though most of these examples are usually written by the attention-seeking idiots themselves.
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STOP RIGHT THERE, FAGGOT! ED does NOT need a huge list of absolute nobodies, nor does it give a shit about your petty forum feud with that bitch who doesn't agree with your Zutara OTP. Rather than spreading your butthurt vendetta over to this site, how about you read ED:101 and ED:A User's Guide to Article Building. And while you're at it, how about contributing to some actual drama you fucking idiot? |
Pwnon and the furries
One day, a member named Pwnon posted a thread entitled "Is the blockland forum being invaded by furries?" and as the title suggests, the OP was about furries invading and pwnon's obvious hatred at furries. It resulted in a shitstorm of epic proportions. Much lulz ensued. [2]
Robo and Slick
Attention whore Jimmg posted a topic about Slicksilver banning his bro RoboNoob after he forgot to pay him for the whore he bought. The topic unfolded in a mass of fake suicide, nudes being spread, and fun times.
Zoneark and Truce: Skiddie Trolls
Truce made a client script that gave him direct console access on servers. Together with Zoneark, they did this just to clear some bricks, ban random people, and otherwise cause chaos "for luls". Badspot finally caught on and demanded they tell him what is the cause of this. Zoneark blamed it on Iban's zombie mod, which Badspot was quick to judge as complete shit and instead targeted McTwist's RP Core mod as the source. Zoneark, Truce, and Only1Rebel (whom had not appeared in either the forums or game for over a year), along with three other "unknown" users, had their keys de-activated. This has been going on for two whole weeks before Badspot even took action. Many butthurt players ragequitted from Blockland because their work they spent hours on was deleted forever.
.Aeris.: Smalltime Gambler
Recently, another challenger appeared to the throne of spreading nudes on Blockland. Aeris flashed her 'friends' on the forums, and Jimmg, of Robo and Slick fame, caught on, which led to more drama. Aeris was promptly banned after breaking a rule by claiming she had better things to do than argue on a forum. Three days later, she was unbanned. Small arguments between her and other members of the community continue to happen sporadically.
Despite several warning from more caring members of the community, .Aeris. has made several efforts to add to this article and show the basement dwelling peasants of Encyclopedia Dramatica she is actually just a defenseless young girl that has never done anything wrong, ever, and everyone who does not like her just spontaneously decided to do so (probably because she is so super cute and they are jealous because they don't have a girlfriend). Her revisions include revising this subsection to reflect better on her and more poorly on the rest of the community, and adding an aside under the below picture demanding that ED find the pictures of her naked. She also registered another account and tried to add a piece about Jimmg (the person who pointed out how many nude pictures she had given out). Unfortunately for her, these revisions were undone by SysOps, meaning that the bullshit she tried to add was so flagrantly retarded that people whom have never played Blockland and were not involved in the incident could clearly see what a crock of shit it was.
Recently, .Aeris. took a fucking hint and had one of the prepubescent boys she gave nudes to post that she is leaving. This is probably a sincere notice letting her friends know that she will no longer be active in the forums and it is very unlikely that she is doing this for attention.
In a chat with Visage, .Aeris. revealed that she was a spy part of a group of /b/tards on Blockland to troll and take over Blockland. If all of these /b/tards are as successful as her, the forums should be under their control by next week
—Aeris being the mad attention whore she is. | ||
MegaScience: Savior of Women
Over the course of a few days, MegaScience tried to secretly vandalize this article because he came across a half-nude pic of a girl he loves. Now, knowing Megascience and WhiteKnights, once they don't get their way they go and cry about it, such as he did over at Blockland's forums.
According to Blockland's own community, MegaScience is known for being the biggest suckup to females on the site. Whenever you can, please remind him that he'll never get laid and removing pictures of his many girly friends will take him even further away from any china he will ever know.
Let's not forget how much he'll ask you to add him on various IMs if you somewhat agree with him on something. Status = Forever Alone.
MegaScience Words of Wisdom
—MegaScience, admitting to his blatant faggotry | ||
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Lord Tony
CURRENT HIGH-SCORE HOLDER FOR MOST ACCOUNTS PERMANENTLY BANNED: 11
Lord Tony is a typical Brony who likes to jack to fat ponies and bestiality, or at least this is what he wants you to think.
In truth Tony is a 25 year old lonely basement dweller second floor dweller who lives with his parents and attempts to troll people all day rather then getting off his lazy ass and getting a job got called for a job.
Some of Tony's glorious trolling.
Lord Tony: There's a snake in my ass. Zookuw: wat Zookuw: And you complain about figurines Lord Tony: there's a pony dick in my ass Zookuw: Why do you like that sort of thing tony? Lord Tony: I shove pony dols in my butt Lord Tony: show the world Lord Tony: of my sick doll fetish Zookuw: Also your piss fetish? Lord Tony: I pee on dolls Zookuw: Of course you do tony of course you do Lord Tony: I have sex with dead pony dolls
Furries
Very rarely does a community solely consist entirely of negative traits, but Blockland strives for perfection. One of the most agonizing traits of Blockland's community is its tolerance to Furries. Even Roblox has a rule against anything related to the fandom, including user-made cat ears and other accessories. Even though the founder and only admin of the board appears to be anti-furry, he is too fucking lazy to do anything about it (and probably gets off to it.) Despite how many community members don't even want the furries to stay there, they willingly prance around with avatars cut from hentai and signatures with nothing but soft-core porn in a mild, yet effective, effort at trolling the entire user base.
Badspot's "Secret" Website
Blockland players accidentally discovered Badspot's alternate website, thus starting a thread about it on the forum. This topic started out nicely just showing everyone that their favorite developer is actually a sick fuck by linking them to his personal cartoon porn website, which was full of sex "transformation" animations, and comics. In retaliation, he decided to DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING and the poster was banned for 2 weeks.
This was an example of overreacting as the website was never deleted - it was just moved somewhere else. You can find it here. Beware, as the artwork isn't even good to begin with.
Unfortunately, all of the comics look the same, or feature shitty attempts at "Art". Poor dude never got laid.
Blockland players on this article
When Blockland forum-goers stumbled upon this article, some fag named Ninja Guy made a topic about it and it resulted in a lollercoaster of accusations. Players eager to defend the powerful graphics and gameplay of Blockland created accounts to blank the page backed up by the white knighting of HoudiniGal.
People who have blanked this article include:
- User:EvilJebus - Replaced with "I am 12 years old and what is this."
- User:AlphaX100 - Removed every section one by one.
- User:China Wolbert - Replaced the article with crap, but was reverted by MysteryBot immediately.
- User:MetalBL - Pulling yet even more whiteknightism.
- User:.Aeris. - Didn't like the fact that she was pwned by the community she was in.
- User:MegaScience - Repeatedly attempted to get a pic down through trying to mask his edits, forgetting that Blockland members seem to love ED (and furthermore, hate him).
- MegaScience's sock.
—SeventhSandwich, because all games are terrible. | ||
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See also
External links
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Blockland is part of a series on Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage. |
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Blockland is part of a series on Visit the Sites Portal for complete coverage. |
| Featured article January 24th & 25th, 2015 | ||
| Preceded by Lowti3rgod |
Blockland | Succeeded by Shanley Kane |