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Haribo® Sugarless Gummy Bears: Difference between revisions
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[[File:Sugar free gummies warning.png|thumb|The warning recommends you limit your gummy dosage.]] | [[File:Sugar free gummies warning.png|thumb|The warning recommends you limit your gummy dosage.]] | ||
Haribo | '''Haribo<sup>®</sup> Sugarless Gummy Bears''', better known by their street name '''Satan's Thunder Demonshits''' ''(STDs)'', or among the children as "Daddy's [[2 Girls 1 Cup|Special-time]] Candy", are an inedible abomination produced from the minds of ex-nazis; the unfortunate byproduct of the German company Haribo attempting to sail waters long unfriendly to Europeans—humanities and health ethics. Originally sold as a targeted poison for the average loser overwhelmed with munchies from a bit of the old [[marijuana|herbal jew]], Haribo miscalculated the popularity of their own delicious products and saw record number of complaints, lawsuits, and cease and desist letters as the entire world pigged out on a healthy alternative to their childhood dreams. | ||
== Killer of Childhood Dreams == | |||
The internet has been around [[Last Thursday|for a while]]. During this period, most of us have had our innocence [[offended|raped away from our psyche]]. However, there are still small parcels that exist in the real world, often overlooked for their brilliant simplicity, which allow us to have just one more small glimpse into our precious, carefree years. Gummy bears is one of these things. | |||
== External Links == | == External Links == |
Revision as of 11:24, 2 March 2014
Haribo® Sugarless Gummy Bears, better known by their street name Satan's Thunder Demonshits (STDs), or among the children as "Daddy's Special-time Candy", are an inedible abomination produced from the minds of ex-nazis; the unfortunate byproduct of the German company Haribo attempting to sail waters long unfriendly to Europeans—humanities and health ethics. Originally sold as a targeted poison for the average loser overwhelmed with munchies from a bit of the old herbal jew, Haribo miscalculated the popularity of their own delicious products and saw record number of complaints, lawsuits, and cease and desist letters as the entire world pigged out on a healthy alternative to their childhood dreams.
Killer of Childhood Dreams
The internet has been around for a while. During this period, most of us have had our innocence raped away from our psyche. However, there are still small parcels that exist in the real world, often overlooked for their brilliant simplicity, which allow us to have just one more small glimpse into our precious, carefree years. Gummy bears is one of these things.