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Revision as of 05:04, 4 February 2014

So common it has its own deletion category.

As Encyclopedia Dramatica increases in popularity, many wannabe trolls think it would inflate their e-penis to have an article written about them. However, since they are failure nobodys and no one will ever write an article about them other than to detail what faggots they are, they write it themselves. Vanity Pages are articles created with the intention of making the subject more popular and internet famous.

Vanity Whores

Vanity whores come in three flavours:

  • The Advertiser

Tries to get advertising to Encyclopedia Dramatica without paying. These users are spotted instantly and swiftly crushed under the banhammer.

  • The Self-deprecator

This sub-breed tries to write their own article on how stupid and unfunny they are before the EDiots find and start spamming the shit out of them. Their article are soon deleted and their userpage splattered with 1man1jar.

On rare occasions however their articles are good enough to keep. Some people throw themselves into the deep end and think this will instantly make them into internet celebrities. Unable to handle the sudden influx of trolls, their plan backfires and they quickly delete fucking everything.

  • The Internet Celebrity

The worst breed of all - these people have no sense of shame whatsoever cannot tell the difference between being famous (where people recognise and seek them out to congratulate them) and being infamous (where people recognise and seek them out to tear out their intestines). These users thrive on this attention and simply refuse to set themselves on fire as everybody wishes they would. Such users are more likely to be fundies and think having an ED article automatically makes them edgy and misunderstood.

The Evolution of the Vanity Page

NOTE: Not all attention whores complete all three stages. Some will slink off after stage two, others will skip straight to stage three.

Attention whores react to their page in three stages:

1. Outrage
Threats of legal action and e-lawyers come spam up the talkpages of all the major sysops. The subject will then upload video on how they are going to sue Encyclopedia Dramatica and fill up their deviantart account with hate art.


2. HAHA DISREGARD THAT I LIEK IT REALLY
In complete contrast to the above the subject will then claim to have a sense of humour and find their article really funny. Attempts to have their page deleted will slowly grind to a halt and they will posts the link to their article on every available site.


3. SSP
The experienced attention whore will then upload embarrassing and personal information about themselves under the delusion that their ED article is now their livejournal.

EDiots & Dramacrats

You may have noticed that several ED sysops (and ex-sysops) have their own vanity page. Unlike other users however, they have perfectly valid reasons for creating their articles. Like all ED articles their pages are dedicated to showing how pitifully pathetic the life of the average internet user is, thus proving even ED veterans cannot avoid being laughed at, with no exceptions.

Since the creation of ED Forums, vanity pages created by and dedicated to ED users has been on the rise. Oddly enough, ED users who laugh at sad, deluded lolcows being harassed by trolls (some worse than others) think creating a page about themselves is an excellent idea.

See Also


Vanity Page
is part of a series on
LERNIN 2 INTERNET

Pitfalls:

AspierationsBLANKING IN PROGRESSCharming NaïvetéDelete fucking everythingDOIN IT RONGEdginessFailing itInternet tough guyKids on the internetLegal actionLiberalismMental illnessMod SassSkript kiddiesSob StoriesTrollsUnrealistic ExpectationsUnwarranted Self-ImportanceWaaaambulance

Previous Hiscores:
AnimaljailApplemilk1988Cheryl ShumanDalhuskyFlardoxHal TurnerLittleCloudOnigojirakaijuPrince JeremyScience PiratesScientologySokiTwopawSweet EvaPeppermintPattiPoeticironyXxPrincessPunkxxZeriara

PROTIPS:
ARCHIVE FUCKING EVERYTHINGAn heroGoing Back To GaiaLURKING MOARProtect fucking everythingShutting The Fuck UpStopping posting