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Tyler Peterson: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 00:04, 15 March 2023
Tyler Peterson was a deputy Sheriff in Crandon, Wisconsin. On October 7th, 2007, at 2:00pm, after he woke up from a 45 minute nap and decided to take a stroll through the woods, where he was brutally murdered by a police sniper.
This sad incident was probably unrelated to the fact that 12 hours earlier, he went to a local pizza party at somebody's house, where his ex-gff rejected him, and all of her friends called him names like "worthless pig". Peterson went batshit insane, grabbed his rifle, and pwned two male suburban dwellers and four hotties... Sadly, Peterson was only 20 years old and hadn't outgrown his fucktarded jock phase from high school, so he may not have realized that in America, calling a cop a "worthless pig" is just like saying "hello".
News Report Highlights
5 hours after the murders, around 7:30 a.m, Peterson showed up at the friend's house in north Crandon. He calmly told the Kegley family about what happened, and spent a few hours talking and thinking things through. He told them they weren't in danger, but refused to get rid of the gun he had tucked behind his butt.
The family quietly called 911... and apparently, it took a couple of hours for the police to show up. The family would occasionally wander outside to look for them. Tyler took a 45 minute nap in the bed of his truck. A few laborers from the family's construction company arrived at the scene, heard about what happened, and continued to call 911 "many, many" times.
Tyler's nap was eventually disturbed by the arrival of dozens of officers. They cordoned off 200 acres and began to negotiate... when you are dealing with an armed 20-year-old fucktard, you don't want to take any chances. Negotiators couldn't get him to drop the gun, but Tyler made it clear that he was ready to deal with the police... Paraphrased, "I want to turn myself in, I want to decide what kind of consequences I want to face, what can we do?"
Somewhere around 2 p.m. Peterson walked off toward the woods. He got about 50 yards from the house and was shot by a sniper, however it was latter announced that he shot himself in the head three times, twice under the chin and once in the side, while the sniper got him in the ass. It is widely believed that this force was excessive, and non-lethal methods were available to police.
EDiot Research
After searching MySpace for 54520 Crandon zip code, EDiot researchers found only a couple of accounts with displays that read "R.I.P" - however one said ""R.I.P. nick brooks. your new band blows". Basically no one cares and/or less than five people in Crandon actually have access to the internets' tubes.
High Score
Graded score | |
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Kills: | 6/20 (1 injury) |
Accuracy: | 9/20 7 shot out of 30 bullets fired |
Style: | 16/20 not a school shooting. |
Butthurt: | 10/20 Nobody cares. |
Bonus: | 17/20 Killing high school students - at a party. |
Total score: 58/100 (F+) |
Resources
- crandon high school: where everyone was
faggedfragged - tory51209 - she wants her brother and also lives in SLUTSVILLE, Wisconsin
- Murderpedia's Informative page.
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Tyler enjoyed racing kiddie-cars a few years ago when he was 15
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Tyler's "hot" sister, Tori
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You knew it was only a matter of time before you saw this
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A picture from Tyler's high school yearbook with his new toy
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MTG - the latest card in the (home) Invasion series - Tyler Peterson, Creature Legend
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Tyler has been nominated as an honorary /b/tard for his actions in the field.
Spree/One-time Killers: |
Aaron Alexis • Adam Lanza • Alex Hribal • Alyssa Bustamante • Anthony Warner • Audrey Hale • Bruce Jeffrey Pardo • Casey Anthony • Cho Seung-Hui • Devin Patrick Kelley • Dylan Klebold • Dylann Storm Roof • Eric Harris • Gerry McCann • James Holmes • Jared Lee Loughner • Jason Rodriguez • Jeff Weise • Jiverly Voong • Joe Stack • Josef Fritzl • Laaiti Ekenstéen • Mark Essex • Martin Bryant • Matthew de Grood • Matthew Murray • Matti Saari • Maurice Clemmons • Pekka-Eric Auvinen • Raoul Moat • Richard Speck • Robert Hawkins • Stephen Paddock • Tim Kretschmer • Timothy Hendron • TJ Lane • Tyler Peterson • Wade Michael Page • Woo Bum-kon | |
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Career/Serial Killers: |
Academy Maniacs • Adolf Hitler • Charles Manson • Chris Benoit • Dnepropetrovsk Maniacs • Dubya • Jack the Ripper • Jeffrey Dahmer • Mao Zedong • Richard "The Iceman" Kuklinski • Ted Bundy | |
Terrorists: |
Al Qaeda • Anders Behring Breivik • Anderson Lee Aldrich • Anton Lundin Pettersson • Dzhokhar Tsarnaev • Elliot Rodger • George Sodini • Maniacs Murder Cult • Mark Essex • Nidal Malik Hasan • Osama bin Laden • Tamerlan Tsarnaev • Ted Kaczynski | |
See also: |
Antisocial personality disorder • Jews • Murder • Paranoid personality disorder • Pittsburgh Paint Job • Police Brutality • Sick fuck |