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Funko Pop!: Difference between revisions

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[[File:paul-scardino-holding-up-his-funko-pop-collection.png|right|thumb|You too could hoard a collection of worthless pop-culture trinkets!]]
[[File:paul-scardino-holding-up-his-funko-pop-collection.png|right|thumb|You too could hoard a collection of worthless pop culture tokens!]]
[[File:Funko Pops.jpg|right|thumb|These things are already nightmare full that when you look up creepy looking pics you just see a Funko Pop.]]
[[File:Funko Pops.jpg|right|thumb|These things are already nightmare full that when you look up creepy looking pics you just see a Funko Pop.]]
{{factalert|<big>IT'S BEANIE BABIES 2 ELECTRIC BOOGALOO!</big> Be sure to laugh at all the fags collecting this crap before the bubble bursts and the funkos aren't worth anything}}


'''Funko Pops''' aka '''Fucko Poops''' are a brand of ugly looking overpriced [[Plastic crap|plastic-junk]] with heads that had a blowjob and eyes that will [[creepypasta|stare into your soul]]. These pieces of [[shit]] are supposed to be onbased on characters from pop culture. The goal is to take any character and turn it into an ugly looking monstrosity that looks the same as rest. Stores like to put a shitload of these little [[shits]], and plague the shelfs everywhere. Some [[manchildren|people]] actually [[LOL WUT|buy these toys]]. Why buy these when you can buy a cheaply made toy that's at least better what every single one of these fuckers are? [[Who cares]]? Its's not like these toys matter.
Can you think of anything more cringey than a bunch of grown-ass adults spending [[Unlimited_disposable_income|a ton of money]] on worthless shit like the dumbasses they are? Stamps, coins, comic books, or [[furfag|furry porn]] to a lesser extent? Now imagine how much of a loser you have to be to have an obsession like that over a bunch of [[Chinese|mass-produced garbage made in a third-world sweatshop]]. Inconceivable, right? ''Wrong.''
 
The truth is Fucko Poops are noting more than a shitty fad, that will fade away into obscurity soon.
 
==Collecting==
 
Want to buy some Fucko Poops here's a guide on how you can buy one, If your neckbeard fucker that really likes playing with toys when you should be getting a life instead.
 
1.Find a store, they're bound to have some Fucko Poops somewhere.
 
2.Pick up some Fucko Poops, they have a shelf full of them.
 
3.[[Do it fgt|Buy it]].


4. Fuck off
Enter '''Funko Pop Vinyls''', a series of poorly-made and mediocre plastic renditions of pop culture icons that overcrowd store shelves at exorbitant prices. They are styled very similarly to [[Japanese]] [[Animu#Chibi|chibis]], with the exception that the majority of these things use the exact same basic template with a different coat of lead paint smeared over it, two large black vacant eyes locked in an unending stare and the distinct lack of a mouth. It's the [[irl]] version of [[Rule 34]]: if it exists, there's a dreadful funko pop vinyl version of it. We haven't seen a garbage franchise leech off the popularity of other franchises like this since Tiger Electronics' LCD handhelds, but even then they were cheaper and you could actually do something with them. You can't even take Funkos out of the box; heaven forbid you squander their 'resale value.'


5. Now you have some Fucko Poops, good job wasting your jew gold motherfucker.
Whether they are being collected as a part of a hobby or [[HA HA HA, OH WOW|a long-term financial investment]], these things are made of [[fail]] and [[AIDS]] and the only way we will be rid of them is if everyone rightly laughs at these 'collectors' for their [[faggotry]]. They're also an inferior version of [[Weaboo|Nendoroids]] lol.


==Collectors==
==Collecting Nothing but Dust==
[[File:Venom-funkopops.png|400px|thumb|right|Wow, Venom is so epic and edgy! Mom, can I have $30?]]
Despite being a toy marketed for [[kids|dumb little children]], their longevity can be attributed in no small part to their [[Capitalism|appeal]] to fat [[manchildren]] and [[You|neckbeard]] [[MovieBob|consoomers]] who continue to buy them because of their attachment to a particular brand they obsess over. There are two primary markets for this plastic crap: The first is the one we've already covered, just a funko pop version of a pop culture icon, because it hits the manchild in their [[nostalgia]] feels so hard they scream like an [[autist]] and open their wallet. For others it's the novelty of having two franchises bashed together like rocks into an OC so abominable that even [[furries]] would find it difficult to [[fap]] to. One of the worst offenders in the ''Funk-OC Mashup Madness'' is Venom, with [[Over_9000|over a gorillion]] fucking mash-ups with other equally [[cancer|cancerous]] IPs.


People have a ton of money, while a lot of people will spend money on worthless shit, the dumbasses they are. These people have different way to spend their money, spend it on Fucko Poops too be a waste to are society. People have entire collections of Fucko Poops, hell they might have millions of them. and show them off for everyone to troll them over to other losers who to spend their time collecting plastic crap instead of doing there [[shit|job]].
Funko Pops are so widespread it is easy for one to start collecting them. They are often sold in supermarkets, dollar stores, pawnbrokers, market stalls and even in [[Anthrocon|Funkopop conventions.]] Collectors would often claim that they can be bought or resold at an inflated prices, or [[lies|their availability and affordability are net positives compared to other collectables]], while neglecting to mention that the only other people who want them are other sad collectors who need to get a life.


{{videoframe|Manchildren|background-color:#fff;|font-weight:bold
{{videoframe|Manchildren|background-color:#fff;|font-weight:bold
|<youtube>Jpi2tXoCKmo</youtube>
|<youtube>Jpi2tXoCKmo</youtube>
|<youtube> OwybAms1a9c</youtube>
|<youtube>OwybAms1a9c</youtube>
|}}
|}}


==How to troll collectors==
==How to troll collectors==
 
*Say that these Fucko Poops are ugly and anyone that buys them is too
*Say that these Fucko Poops are ugly and anyone that buys them is too.
*Tell them that a 30-year-old man shouldnt be playing with toys
 
*Tell them they seen as losers by the everyone else
*Tell them that 30 year old man should be playing with toys.
*Tell them there's better plastic crap based on their favorite [[shit no one cares about|characters]]
 
*Open one of their mint in box Funko Poops
*Say that Fucko Poops are a rip-off of [[weeaboo|Nendroid]].
*Open another
 
*Say they're losing jew gold for buying them
*Tell them they seen as losers by the everyone else.
*Tell them that Funko Pops are cheaply made and mass-produced, meaning [[fact|they're worthless]]
 
*Break some of their plastic crap
*Tell them there's better plastic crap based on there favorite [[shit no one cares about|characters]].
*Say that people that buy them, could do anything and it would still be better than buying these pieces of plastic crap
 
*Say that [[truth|Fucko Poops are just a fad, and in a few years people will laugh at them for having all that plastic crap]]
*Say there loosing jew gold from buying them
 
*Tell them that Fucko Poops are cheaply made and mass produced, meaning [[fact|they're worthless]].
 
*Break some of there plastic crap.
 
*Say that people that buy them, could do anything and it would still be better than buying this pieces of plastic crap.
 
*Say that [[truth|Fucko Poops are just a fad, and in a few years people will laugh at them for having all that plastic crap]].


==Gallery==
==Gallery==
Line 58: Line 39:
File:Funko Pops Superhero.png
File:Funko Pops Superhero.png
File:Funko Pops Suck.jpg| Fucko Poops suck
File:Funko Pops Suck.jpg| Fucko Poops suck
File:Funko Pop Meme.jpg
File:Funko Pop Meme.png
File:Funko Pop Rule 34.jpg| You can barely find any because even the people at Rule 34 find these pieces crap to ugly
File:Funko Pop Rule 34.jpg|Even the people at Rule 34 find these pieces crap too ugly to fap to.
</gallery>|
</gallery>|
<gallery>
<gallery>
Line 67: Line 48:


==See Also==
==See Also==
*[[Amiibo]]
*[[Amiibo]]
*[[Hello Kitty]]
*[[Hello Kitty]]
*[[Family Guy]]
*[[Family Guy]]
 
*[[White People]]
*[[Inflation]]
 
 
{{BNA}}

Latest revision as of 22:05, 23 February 2022

You too could hoard a collection of worthless pop-culture trinkets!
These things are already nightmare full that when you look up creepy looking pics you just see a Funko Pop.
FACT ALERT:
IT'S BEANIE BABIES 2 ELECTRIC BOOGALOO! Be sure to laugh at all the fags collecting this crap before the bubble bursts and the funkos aren't worth anything

Can you think of anything more cringey than a bunch of grown-ass adults spending a ton of money on worthless shit like the dumbasses they are? Stamps, coins, comic books, or furry porn to a lesser extent? Now imagine how much of a loser you have to be to have an obsession like that over a bunch of mass-produced garbage made in a third-world sweatshop. Inconceivable, right? Wrong.

Enter Funko Pop Vinyls, a series of poorly-made and mediocre plastic renditions of pop culture icons that overcrowd store shelves at exorbitant prices. They are styled very similarly to Japanese chibis, with the exception that the majority of these things use the exact same basic template with a different coat of lead paint smeared over it, two large black vacant eyes locked in an unending stare and the distinct lack of a mouth. It's the irl version of Rule 34: if it exists, there's a dreadful funko pop vinyl version of it. We haven't seen a garbage franchise leech off the popularity of other franchises like this since Tiger Electronics' LCD handhelds, but even then they were cheaper and you could actually do something with them. You can't even take Funkos out of the box; heaven forbid you squander their 'resale value.'

Whether they are being collected as a part of a hobby or a long-term financial investment, these things are made of fail and AIDS and the only way we will be rid of them is if everyone rightly laughs at these 'collectors' for their faggotry. They're also an inferior version of Nendoroids lol.

Collecting Nothing but Dust

Wow, Venom is so epic and edgy! Mom, can I have $30?

Despite being a toy marketed for dumb little children, their longevity can be attributed in no small part to their appeal to fat manchildren and neckbeard consoomers who continue to buy them because of their attachment to a particular brand they obsess over. There are two primary markets for this plastic crap: The first is the one we've already covered, just a funko pop version of a pop culture icon, because it hits the manchild in their nostalgia feels so hard they scream like an autist and open their wallet. For others it's the novelty of having two franchises bashed together like rocks into an OC so abominable that even furries would find it difficult to fap to. One of the worst offenders in the Funk-OC Mashup Madness is Venom, with over a gorillion fucking mash-ups with other equally cancerous IPs.

Funko Pops are so widespread it is easy for one to start collecting them. They are often sold in supermarkets, dollar stores, pawnbrokers, market stalls and even in Funkopop conventions. Collectors would often claim that they can be bought or resold at an inflated prices, or their availability and affordability are net positives compared to other collectables, while neglecting to mention that the only other people who want them are other sad collectors who need to get a life.

How to troll collectors

  • Say that these Fucko Poops are ugly and anyone that buys them is too
  • Tell them that a 30-year-old man shouldnt be playing with toys
  • Tell them they seen as losers by the everyone else
  • Tell them there's better plastic crap based on their favorite characters
  • Open one of their mint in box Funko Poops
  • Open another
  • Say they're losing jew gold for buying them
  • Tell them that Funko Pops are cheaply made and mass-produced, meaning they're worthless
  • Break some of their plastic crap
  • Say that people that buy them, could do anything and it would still be better than buying these pieces of plastic crap
  • Say that Fucko Poops are just a fad, and in a few years people will laugh at them for having all that plastic crap

Gallery

Collection of soy About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

See Also