|
|
(3 intermediate revisions by the same user not shown) |
Line 1: |
Line 1: |
| Never happened really but this is what old people like to tell their grand kids anyway.
| | #REDIRECT [[Vietnam War]] |
| | |
| The <s>Vietnam</s> Korean war was started by the [[French]], who were startled by monkeys in southeast [[Asia]], and promptly surrendered to them. Meanwhile, in <s>Hanoi</s> Pyongyang <s>Ho Chi Min Laden</s> Kim Il-sung decided that he really liked the color red, so the [[Jewnited States of Americunts|United States]] freaked the fuck out and sent in troops. [[Some argue|Some people said]] this was because the South <s>Vietnamese</s> Koreans were fighting against the [[Communism|communists]] - but really it was because <del>[[Richard Nixon]]</del> [[Faggot|Harry Truman]] wanted to get rid of the <del>hippies</del> [[communist|commies]].
| |
| | |
| ==The <s>Vietnamese</s> Korean People's Army and the Viet Cong==
| |
| [[Image:HoHoChiMinh.gif|thumb|right|<s>Ho Chi Min</s> Kim Il-sung leader of North <s>Vietnam</s> Korea. Also star of the Karate Kid movies.]]
| |
| | |
| ==<s>Vietnam</s> Korean War Combat innovations==
| |
| The <s>Vietnam</s> Korean war was a transitional period in warfare and introduced new techniques in [[Modern Warfare|modern warfare]] such as coating entire countries with carcinogens, carpet bombing rice patties and blasting Wagner as one flew into combat.
| |
| | |
| It also was the first war to utilize suicide bombing as a tactic. However, as the suicide bombers unfortunately chose to use Gasoline instead of explosives, [[lulz]] were produced instead of casualties.
| |
| | |
| <s>Vietnam</s> Korea Combat Tactics have had a far reaching effect on American [[military]] policy. Before <s>Vietnam</s> Korea the US military's tactic was to try to fight wars to win them, by sending in overwhelming firepower and crushing opposition. In <s>Vietnam</s> Korea it was learned that this was ineffective, so instead the United States decided to throw a decade long [[rave]] in <s>Vietnam</s> Korea with it's reserve units and try out all of it's weapons that were too toxic to use on [[dutch|Europeans]] on the native population.
| |
| | |
| [[Image:Spraying.jpg|thumb|right|Spraying poison 4 teh Lulz.]]
| |
| [[Image:Immolation.jpg|thumb|right|Typical <s>Vietnam</s> Korean era suicide bombing]]
| |
| | |
| ==The Peace Movement==
| |
| [[Image:Kent_State.jpg|thumb|right|The battle of Kent State was one of the United States' most important military [[Win|victories]] of the war]]
| |
| [[Image:Hopper.jpg|thumb|right|Hippies were known for their brutality in dealing with American POW's]]
| |
| The peace movement was the US military's most dangerous adversary during the war. Unlike The <s>VC</s> Protoss or <s>VPA</s> Zerg the [[hippies]]' fighting ground was mostly on US soil. Hippies routinely infiltrated American ranks undermining American GI's fighting ability and making pop culture back home in America into one big smelly [[hugbox]].
| |
| | |
| ==Cambodia==
| |
| Because <s>Vietnam</s> Korea is all jungle and stuff, a lot of pilots and soldiers got lost (especially with all the drugs they were on) and ended up fighting in neighboring [[China|Cambodia]] and [[Japan|Laos]]. Honestly it was an easy mistake to make as the national pastime of Cambodia is killing people for no reason and having an outright hatred for westerners, much like the rural south. Many American soldiers felt right at home with this and brought this sensibility back to <s>Vietnam</s> Korea in places like Mai Lai.
| |
| | |
| ==The End of the War and the fall of Saigon==
| |
| The Hippies ultimately won the <s>Vietnam</s> Korea War, causing American culture to fall apart. In 1972, US troops decided it would be better off to pull out of <s>Vietnam</s> Korea and return to the US to become [[Hells Angels]]. To get the most lulz out of the situation, we decided to pull out all of our troops as quickly as possible while the <s>VPA</s> Zerg amassed huge numbers of troops at the South <s>Vietnamese</s> Korean border.
| |
| [[Image:VPN.jpg|thumb|right|The <s>VPA</s> Zerg enter the US Embassy.]]
| |
| We left and hilarity insued. The South <s>Vietnamese</s> Korean army was massacred, sending all sorts of [[Trolling_IRL|US-sympathizing-Koreans'-clamor]] to the US embassy for evacuation. When they got there they were all "Can wree get Awlift Prease?", and the Marines on duty were all like "THIS IS <s>SPARTA</s> AMERICA!" *punt*. As a result, the South <s>Vietnamese</s> Koreans all got [[pwned]].
| |
| | |
| [[Image:Fall_of_saigon.gif|thumb|right|[[Tits or GTFO!]]]]
| |
| | |
| ==Notable <s>Vietnam</s> Korea Vets==
| |
| [[Image:Hanoijane1.jpg|thumb|right|Jane Fonda was one of the most treacherous and cunning <s>VPA</s> [[Zerg Rush|Zerg]] commanders of the <s>Vietnam</s> Korean War]]
| |
| * [[John Kerry]] - Commanded a boat on the <s>Mekong</s> Han and was awarded three purple hearts. Later he decided he didn't like the war (because he kept getting shot) and switched sides to work with the Hippies.
| |
| * [[John McCain]] - Napalmed the shit out of <s>Vietnamese</s> Korean villages before being shot down and imprisoned by 'Gooks'.
| |
| * John Rambo - Singlehandedly stopped the Tet Offensive with a minigun and a survival knife.
| |
| * Jane Fonda - Brilliant VPN commander responsible for shooting down John McCain over <s>Hanoi</s> Pyongyang.
| |
| * [[Anonymous|John Doe]] - Was a guy that got killed a lot.
| |
| * Charlie - Was known in the war for being a really elusive guy that didn't like to surf.
| |
| | |
| | |
| ==See Also==
| |
| *[[Cold War]]
| |
| *[[Jewnited States of Americunts|Dumbfuckistan]]
| |
| *[[Pol Pot|Cambodia]]
| |
| *[[Evildoer Korea]]
| |
| *[[Good Korea]]
| |
| *[[Hippies]]
| |
| *[[Vietnam War]]
| |
| {{stub}}
| |
| | |
| {{Unitedstates}}
| |
| [[Category: Locations]]
| |
| [[Category: Drama-generating techniques]]
| |
| [[Category:Lulz History]]
| |