Diabeetus

	ALERT: THIS IS A FORCED MEME
	Diabeetus will be posted by the same unfunny newfag until you like it.

No claim forms! No upfront costs! No rejections just because you look like a walrus!

Diabeetus, also known as sugar leg, is a deadly disease that you contract when you eat a lifetime's worth of yummy snacks in 10 minutes. Said to be deadlier than AIDS, this horrible sickness will plague your life, force you to pay attention to shitty medical commercials, and turn you into a fat, wheezing heart attack on legs (or on wheels, if you get wheelchair'd.) Diabeetus is the second deadliest STD in the world, after homosexuality.

President Taft, in his natural habitat

The Origin

Diabeetus was first introduced as a hair care product by The Man in early 1989, as an effort to eradicate the black population. In its pure, crystalline form, diabeetus resembles a fetus made out of meth and broken dreams. Direct inhalation of pure diabeetus has a similar effect to snorting crack off of the scrotum of a transvestite prostitute in a back alley in Detroit.

The Disease

Do you have diabeetus?

Diabeetus is a much less internets-valuable disease than most others. Especially type 2 diabeetus is usually a good indication that you're an engorged, useless waste of space, which compared to other diseases (like anorexia, which makes you pretty; bipolarism, which makes you unique; and AIDS, which makes you sexually desirable) is worthless in generating sympathy. Those who say "I have diabeetus" in an emotional, cut for "mature matters" post will more often than not be lawled at and flooded with fat insults, resulting in the journal becoming friends only. Those plagued with diabeetus suffer cruelly at the hands of their peers; it's common to feel sorry for them, until you remember that they're fat.

Diabeetus was the final stroke of death for Shay. While in an insane asylum, Shay sat around shitting herself and stuffing her face. One morning, she gobbled up everything in her reach and keeled over dead from diabetic shock. The hospital staff lulzed, as did the rest of the internets, thanks in large part to Jameth.

Dr. Mcninja HATES diabeetus. [1][2]

The Meme

Diabeetus on Family Guy, which happens to be a very unfunny show.

It's official: you are a joke.

Originating on /b/, "diabeetus" became a huge enough hit to earn it a place on the /b/eatles. It was used, along with AIDS, as a spamword in the Habbo Raid. It's sometimes used as a nonsense spam on teh boards at 4chan, although quoting anything else from the commercials is considered un-1337, unless it's "these are my testing supplies." It's also a popular choice for mini-memes, and was one of the first to be used in the reaction meme. It didn't do so great with the YTMND crowd [3][4] :-( But that didn't stop it from getting a lulzy redirect on Wikipedia, and even got some edits past the Keepers of Knowledge, describing the meme. The usual participants in the War on Memes still haven't caught it.

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Diabeetis.com popped up in June 2006, and included pix, videos and even a gay little game. Unfortunately, this did not stop them from FAILing for misspelling the name. Pretty much all the internet attention Wilford Brimley will ever get; he will die after many years (probably of diabeetus, lol) with the deep shame of being immortalized as a joke instead of an actor. The probability of everyone being able to keep a straight face at his funeral is less than zero, especially if /b/ decides to raid his memorial services like they did to Mitchell Henderson's E-funeral. ALSO ACCORDING TO GTA 4 DIABEETUS IS A LIE

Well Known Diabeetus Facts

"Suspect apprehended after hijacking US Sugar Co tanker truck"

- 95% of all Americans die of diabeetus every five seconds.
- The only way to kill a Diabeetux is to remove its head.
- All Diabeetux wish you where dead.
- All Diabeetux wish they themselves where dead, but can't afford rope to hang themselves.
- All Diabeetux hate themselves with a loathing greater than any other found in this dimension or any other.
- All Diabeetux wish they were some one else.
- Over 85% of Diabeetux also want to torture and/or kill the person they wish they were.
- The other 15% are the few capable of acheiving erections, and only want to rape the person they wish they were.
- All Diabeetux have been scientifically proven to be hated by God, but not as hated as Canceroids.
- There actually is a cure, but you can go fuck yourself and die in a hole because they want your money.

The Face

Wilford Brimley's reaction to being lawled at by the internets.

The Face of Diabeetus is actor Wilford Brimley, who went from has-been actor to commercial endorser for Liberty Medical Supplies to laughingstock of the internets. Videos and image macros of the fat walrus were made depicting only one word: diabeetus. In the final blow, Diabeetis and Diabeetus were redirected to Wilford Brimley on Wikipedia, forever solidifying his association with diabeetus. The lesson to be learned from this is that a 20+ year career is nothing compared to the internet scorn you can endure if you talk funny. This is often cited in the "for the lulz" theory of the universe.

Was on the TV show Our House with Deidre Hall. It is said that she hid his testing supplies, and he almost died.

According to imdb.com, Brimley was a big fan of president Howard Taft, so much so that he got diabeetus and plastic surgery just to look like him. Srsly. Don't believe me? Go look it up.

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Gallery

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Sugar Shock About missing Pics

• 
  A challenger appears
• 
  OMG Wilford is Santa Claus!
• 
  OMG Wilford is an Ewok!
• 
  OMG Wilford is on MySpace!
• 
  OMG Wilford is a lolrus!

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

• 
  OMG Wilford is in games!!
• 
  Wilford Brimley's secret experiment to create Cat Diabeetus.
• 
  A young Wilford Brimley expresses his dismay upon being diagnosed with Diabeetus.
• 
  These are my testing supplies.
• 
  Wilford gets Rule 34'd.
• 
  OMG Bitches don't know about a major metabolic disorder!
• 
  Is it can be insulin tiem now plees?
• 
  It can be contagious
• 
  Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the pool...
• 
  Hey, Wilford Brimley has that!
• 
• 
• 
  Even cartoon characters get struck by diabeetus.
• 
  John Lennon has competition
• 
  Diabeetus. It's the right thing to do.
• 
  do u has it?
• 
  A challenger appears
• 
  Dude should have taken his own advice
• 
  Even the Eds have been affected...
• 
  Wilford in his younger years
• 
  DIABEETUS MAH BOIIIII
• 
• 
• 
  Yer gonna need one after drinking that!
• 

</gallery>

Famous diabeetics

DON'T LET IT HAPPEN TO YOU.

• Bret Michaels
• Nick Jonas
• John Bolton
• Shay
• McDonald's
• ASCIIdent
• TheAmazingAtheist
• Giant Gonzales
• Jay Cutler

See Also

• Fat
• Food
• Amputee

Links

• Diabeetis Diabeetus.com
• Pix - no n00dz :-(
• Vids - two hilarious YouTubes, one lame-ass Stephen Colbert failure
• Beat the Beetus

Diabeetus is part of a series on Memes Visit the Memes Portal for complete coverage.

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Diabeetus is part of a series on Body and Health

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Diabeetus is part of a series on Diseases and Disorders