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Intel: Difference between revisions
imported>Cobaltcat +Anita mention. They are partnered with that whore now. Might expand on that later. |
m Reverted edit by Edgar181's sock puppet 37 (talk) to last revision by [[User:imported>Hazardous Environment|imported>Hazardous Environment]] Tag: Rollback |
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{{ | {{ib|[[File:Intel logo.jpg|250px]]}} | ||
{{Ibhead|<big>'''Intel'''</big>}} | |||
{{Ibrow|'''Website:'''|http://www.intel.com}} | |||
{{Ibrow|'''Notable for'''|Making [[computer]] chips}} | |||
{{Ibrow|'''Enemies'''|[[AMD]]}} | |||
{{Ibrow|'''Active'''|July 18, 1986 to Present}} | |||
{{Ibrow|'''Memes Spawned'''|[[Intel Inside]]}} | |||
{{Ibend}} | |||
[[File:666.jpg|center]] | [[File:666.jpg|center]] | ||
{{clear}} | |||
[[Image:Desu_Inside.png|thumb|right|300px|Newest Intel Processor]] | |||
[[Image:Inside.jpg|thumb|left|150px|Many [[unfunny|"clever"]] spoofs]] | |||
| | [[Image:Konata Inside.png|thumb|left|200px|[[Lucky_Star|Konata]] approved]] | ||
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'''Intel''' makes computer parts with little stickers on them that say "Intel Inside." The sticker prompted a slew of spoofs, including "Intel Outside," "Satan Inside," and "[[Windows]] Vista Capable." | '''Intel''' makes computer parts with little stickers on them that say "Intel Inside." The sticker prompted a slew of spoofs, including "Intel Outside," "Satan Inside," and "[[Windows]] Vista Capable." | ||
Intel caused a panic towards the end of the nineties by inventing the Pentium 3, a chip that would send your phone number to the Mafia, but they repaired their reputation by hiring the Blue Man Group, industry leaders in IT consultancy and [[face_painter|face-painting]]. | Intel caused a panic towards the end of the nineties by inventing the Pentium 3, a chip that would send your phone number to the Mafia, but they repaired their reputation by hiring the Blue Man Group, industry leaders in IT consultancy and [[face_painter|face-painting]]. | ||
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Intel chips are widely recognised as being resposible for 99% of housefires in the whole world, this is because they were built by engineers who [[fap| jerk off]] to clock speeds. [[Protip]], if you don't know what "clock speed" is, you're probably too [[retard| normal]] to be here, go and watch some [[pron]] or something | Intel chips are widely recognised as being resposible for 99% of housefires in the whole world, this is because they were built by engineers who [[fap| jerk off]] to clock speeds. [[Protip]], if you don't know what "clock speed" is, you're probably too [[retard| normal]] to be here, go and watch some [[pron]] or something | ||
==History of Intel== | ==History of Intel== | ||
Intel was founded in 1986, as Integrated Electronics Corporation, by Robert Noyce and Gordon Moore. Since 1982, Intel has been engaged in a litigation battle with Advanced Micro Devices. Intel's Intel Inside advertisement made it, and it's Pentium processor line [[famous]]. Despite the fact AMD is older than Intel by 7 years, Intel still makes more money than AMD, causing a lot of jelly executives at AMD. | Intel was founded in 1986, as Integrated Electronics Corporation, by Robert Noyce and Gordon Moore. Since 1982, Intel has been engaged in a litigation battle with Advanced Micro Devices. Intel's Intel Inside advertisement made it, and it's Pentium processor line [[famous]]. Despite the fact AMD is older than Intel by 7 years, Intel still makes more money than AMD, causing a lot of jelly executives at AMD. | ||
==Intel Vs AMD== | ==Intel Vs AMD== | ||
[[Image:Blue-screen-of-death.jpg|thumb|right|What you can expect from overclocking..]] | |||
The litigation history between Intel and AMD is long, so here is a lovely timeline. | The litigation history between Intel and AMD is long, so here is a lovely timeline. | ||
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{{stub}} | {{stub}} | ||
{{softwarez}} | |||
[[Category:Softwarez]] | [[Category:Softwarez]] | ||
Latest revision as of 23:16, 22 August 2024
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|---|---|
| Intel | |
| Website: | http://www.intel.com |
| Notable for | Making computer chips |
| Enemies | AMD |
| Active | July 18, 1986 to Present |
| Memes Spawned | Intel Inside |
Intel makes computer parts with little stickers on them that say "Intel Inside." The sticker prompted a slew of spoofs, including "Intel Outside," "Satan Inside," and "Windows Vista Capable."
Intel caused a panic towards the end of the nineties by inventing the Pentium 3, a chip that would send your phone number to the Mafia, but they repaired their reputation by hiring the Blue Man Group, industry leaders in IT consultancy and face-painting.
Most low-ranking geeks that run on dial up speed will tell you that Intel chips are shit, and that AMD chips are the way to go. However, none of them have any idea why that is. Experts have recently discovered that AMD chips are actually Intel chips with go-faster stripes painted down the sides. However, Dicks are good.
Intel chips are widely recognised as being resposible for 99% of housefires in the whole world, this is because they were built by engineers who jerk off to clock speeds. Protip, if you don't know what "clock speed" is, you're probably too normal to be here, go and watch some pron or something
History of Intel
Intel was founded in 1986, as Integrated Electronics Corporation, by Robert Noyce and Gordon Moore. Since 1982, Intel has been engaged in a litigation battle with Advanced Micro Devices. Intel's Intel Inside advertisement made it, and it's Pentium processor line famous. Despite the fact AMD is older than Intel by 7 years, Intel still makes more money than AMD, causing a lot of jelly executives at AMD.
Intel Vs AMD
The litigation history between Intel and AMD is long, so here is a lovely timeline.
- 1972. Intel Designs the 8080 processor, the first one ever to run x86 instructions.
- 1981. IBM signs a deal with Intel for use of the 8080 processor in their machines. They chose AMD as the backup supplier.
- 1982. AMD now has the licence to build 8080 processors, and does so.
- 1982. Intel sues AMD, but the judge rules, that by default, AMD inherits the right to use x86 architectures from IBM.
- 1989. AMD sues Intel for breaking the legs of any computer manufacturers that want to use AMD processors. The war is on.
- 2003. AMD Invents the first 64Bit CPU. Not surprisingly, Intel clones it, Sues AMD, and wins, with more advertising.
Most x64 processors are IntelAMD invented 64bit CPUs while Intel sues them for doing so because "64bit was Intel's Idea". - 2005. AMD invents the first Dual Core CPU (AMD64 X2), Intel clones it and then pays everyone to like it.
Intel released the dual core Pentium D, later followed by a new Intel Core series (Core 2 Doo Doo, Core i3, Core i5 and Core i7). AMD continued their dual core Athlon64 X2 CPU line and the quad core Phenom (which wasn't very successful at all), later followed by a much improved Phenom II.
Soon Intel is going to buttfuck itself in the ass by cloning it's own iSeries like Otherkin and AMD are going to release ARM chips, Steamrollers (I see what you did there) and most of all a large billboard on their building of Linus Torvalds flipping the bird.
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Intel is part of a series on Visit the Softwarez Portal for complete coverage. |