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Hacking Team: Difference between revisions
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{{rainbowsmall|HACKING TEAM GOT HACKED!!!1}} | |||
{{achtung|{{twitter|#hackedteam}}}} | |||
[[Image:Hacked-Team-Logo.jpg | 700px | center]] | [[Image:Hacked-Team-Logo.jpg | 700px | center]] | ||
[[Image:Vincenzetti-Barr.jpg | thumb | 350px | right | Okay seriously, what's the difference between these two worthless fucks? They might as well be identical twins.]] | [[Image:Vincenzetti-Barr.jpg | thumb | 350px | right | <s>Okay seriously, what's the difference between these two worthless fucks? They might as well be identical twins.</s>]] | ||
[[Image:Vincenzetti-Keane.png | thumb | 350px | right | Actually this might be a more accurate comparison.]] | |||
[[Image:Tara-Strong-Fucking-Vincenzetti.jpg | thumb | 250px | right | [[Tara Strong]] giving David Vincenzetti [[Rape | what he deserves]]]] | [[Image:Tara-Strong-Fucking-Vincenzetti.jpg | thumb | 250px | right | [[Tara Strong]] giving David Vincenzetti [[Rape | what he deserves]]]] | ||
[[faggots | Hacking Team]] (also known as [[Pwned | Hacked Team]], [[Rape | Fucking Team]], [[LulzSec | Fucked Team]], [[Fail | Failing Team]], [[ | [[faggots | Hacking Team]] (also known as [[Pwned | Hacked Team]], [[Rape | Fucking Team]], [[LulzSec | Fucked Team]], [[Fail | Failing Team]], [[Freethought Blogs | Failed Team]], [[No Cussing Club| Faggot Team]] or Mussolini 2: Reloaded [[srs | S. r. l]]) is a shitty computer "security" company that, like [[HBGary Federal]], [[USI | bills itself as the national guard of the internets]]. They basically sell their own fake and gay version of [[SubSeven]] called Galileo RCS, which is supposedly used to [[Cutefuzzypuppy | cyberstalk]] [[Niggers | criminals]] and [[Muslims | terrorists]], but it was found out that its main use was to [https://citizenlab.org/2015/03/hacking-team-reloaded-us-based-ethiopian-journalists-targeted-spyware/ stalk and harass journalists]. HT is 100 per cent [[Italy]]-based which means that most of its staff and engineers are [[KKK | anti-Semitic and racist against black people]] and support [[Adolf Hitler]] for president. [[Last Thursday]] HT got [http://www.csoonline.com/article/2943968/data-breach/hacking-team-hacked-attackers-claim-400gb-in-dumped-data.html 400 gigabytes of their internal data leaked] by [[Skript kiddie | Phineas Fisher]], and holy fucking shit was this leak an [[epic win]]. | ||
__TOC__ | __TOC__ | ||
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== Fucking Team Gains Momentum == | == Fucking Team Gains Momentum == | ||
[[Image:Hacking-Team-Ad-Rely-On-Us.png | thumb | 150px | right | Why? You dipshits got hacked!]] | [[Image:Hacking-Team-Ad-Rely-On-Us.png | thumb | 150px | right | Why? You dipshits got hacked!]] | ||
Shit for brains and all-in-all failure of a human being [[Internet Tough Guy | David Vincenzetti]] became the CEO of HT and begins promoting the hell out of it. He came up with the [[Stupid | "brilliant"]] idea of a ub3r-l33t hacking kit called Galileo RCS that he could sell to governments [[Fail | that are too stupid to download Metasploit for free]]. David, being the shameless self-promoting piece of shit that he is, [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/8899353/The-spies-behind-your-screen.html pays The Telegraph $5 to write a fluff piece] about his dumbass hacking kit. Apparently, RCS [[Bullshit | "could prove deadlier than any missile"]] and [[Bullshit | "[it's] so powerful it could bring a country to its knees"]]. The article also mentions that David is [[Bullshit | "a law-abiding businessman"]], that he [[Bullshit | "isn’t your typical arms dealer"]] and that [[Bullshit | "he follows strict ethical guidelines".]] Uh, David, paying The Telegraph to suck your dick isn't exactly following strict ethical guidelines. Oh, and [http://arstechnica.com/security/2015/07/hacking-team-orchestrated-brazen-bgp-hack-to-hijack-ips-it-didnt-own/ hijacking IP address ranges that you don't own] isn't really the behavior of a law-abiding businessman. Also, [http://arstechnica.com/security/2015/07/researcher-takes-umbrage-after-finding-his-code-in-hacking-team-malware/ plagiarizing other programmers code] isn't really helping your case for following strict ethical guidelines. Yeah, this "article", if you even want to call it that, is more than enough proof that David Vincenzetti is the Italian version of [[Brett Keane]]. | Shit for brains and all-in-all failure of a human being [[Internet Tough Guy | David Vincenzetti]] became the CEO of HT and begins promoting the hell out of it. He came up with the [[Stupid | "brilliant"]] idea of a ub3r-l33t hacking kit called Galileo RCS that he could sell to governments [[Fail | that are too stupid to download Metasploit for free]]. David, being the shameless self-promoting piece of shit that he is, [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/8899353/The-spies-behind-your-screen.html pays The Telegraph $5 to write a fluff piece] ({{archive|KsJxF|archive}}) about his dumbass hacking kit. Apparently, RCS [[Bullshit | "could prove deadlier than any missile"]] and [[Bullshit | "[it's] so powerful it could bring a country to its knees"]]. The article also mentions that David is [[Bullshit | "a law-abiding businessman"]], that he [[Bullshit | "isn’t your typical arms dealer"]] and that [[Bullshit | "he follows strict ethical guidelines".]] Uh, David, paying The Telegraph to suck your dick isn't exactly following strict ethical guidelines. Oh, and [http://arstechnica.com/security/2015/07/hacking-team-orchestrated-brazen-bgp-hack-to-hijack-ips-it-didnt-own/ hijacking IP address ranges that you don't own] isn't really the behavior of a law-abiding businessman. Also, [http://arstechnica.com/security/2015/07/researcher-takes-umbrage-after-finding-his-code-in-hacking-team-malware/ plagiarizing other programmers code] isn't really helping your case for following strict ethical guidelines. Yeah, this "article", if you even want to call it that, is more than enough proof that David Vincenzetti is the Italian version of [[Brett Keane]]. | ||
== CitizenLab Investigates == | == CitizenLab Investigates == | ||
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== Drama with Lorenzo Franceschi-Bicchierai == | == Drama with Lorenzo Franceschi-Bicchierai == | ||
[[Image:Lorenzo Franceschi Bicchierai.jpg | thumb | right | 125px | Clearly a [[Ann Coulter | terrorist]]]] | [[Image:Lorenzo Franceschi Bicchierai.jpg | thumb | right | 125px | Clearly a [[Ann Coulter | terrorist]]]] | ||
While CitizenLab did a pretty [[gg | decent]] job of making Fucking Team look like complete twats, the real [[lulz]] came from Motherboard VICE writer [[Davis Aurini | Lorenzo Franceschi-Bicchierai]] who has been documenting their bullshit since March 2015. Lorenzo began with [http://motherboard.vice.com/read/ethiopia-allegedly-used-spyware-against-us-based-journalists-again this article] documenting how Fucking Team customer [[Ethiopia]] was abusing RCS to spy on journalists. However, shit started to get [[srs]] when he posted [http://motherboard.vice.com/read/the-dea-has-been-secretly-buying-hacking-tools-from-an-italian-company another article] talking about how Fucking Team's spyware was probably being abused by the U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency to spy on random people suspected to be [[420 | junkies]]. This article was probably enough to provoke our hero {{twitter|GammaGroupPR|Phineas Fisher}} (who previously [http://www.zdnet.com/article/top-govt-spyware-company-hacked-gammas-finfisher-leaked/ ass-raped Gamma Group]) to go out and fuck up Fucking Team. A couple of months later, Fucking Team [[Whatever | proposed a method]] of "De-anonymizing" the [[Tor]] network. Knowing that pretty much every [[Lie | claim]] that came out of Fucking Team's [[Ass | mouth]] was going to end in an [[epic fail]], Lorenzo decided to [http://motherboard.vice.com/read/hacking-team-founder-hey-fbi-we-can-help-you-crack-the-dark-web write about it]. It was here that everyone's favorite [[Jenny McDermott]] | While CitizenLab did a pretty [[gg | decent]] job of making Fucking Team look like complete twats, the real [[lulz]] came from Motherboard VICE writer [[Davis Aurini | Lorenzo Franceschi-Bicchierai]] who has been documenting their bullshit since March 2015. Lorenzo began with [http://motherboard.vice.com/read/ethiopia-allegedly-used-spyware-against-us-based-journalists-again this article] documenting how Fucking Team customer [[Ethiopia]] was abusing RCS to spy on journalists. However, shit started to get [[srs]] when he posted [http://motherboard.vice.com/read/the-dea-has-been-secretly-buying-hacking-tools-from-an-italian-company another article] talking about how Fucking Team's spyware was probably being abused by the U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency to spy on random people suspected to be [[420 | junkies]]. This article was probably enough to provoke our hero {{twitter|GammaGroupPR|Phineas Fisher}} (who previously [http://www.zdnet.com/article/top-govt-spyware-company-hacked-gammas-finfisher-leaked/ ass-raped Gamma Group]) to go out and fuck up Fucking Team. A couple of months later, Fucking Team [[Whatever | proposed a method]] of "De-anonymizing" the [[Tor]] network. Knowing that pretty much every [[Lie | claim]] that came out of Fucking Team's [[Ass | mouth]] was going to end in an [[epic fail]], Lorenzo decided to [http://motherboard.vice.com/read/hacking-team-founder-hey-fbi-we-can-help-you-crack-the-dark-web write about it]. It was here that everyone's favorite [[Jenny McDermott]] wannabe, David Vincenzetti, decided to respond: | ||
{{quote|WE ARE DELIGHTED to have among the close readers of this list, Vice Motherboard which never reports on Hacking Team without smug editorial comment," [Vincenzetti] wrote, describing this article as "hilarious reading."|Ohh can you feel David's [[butthurt]]}} | {{quote|WE ARE DELIGHTED to have among the close readers of this list, Vice Motherboard which never reports on Hacking Team without smug editorial comment," [Vincenzetti] wrote, describing this article as "hilarious reading."|Ohh can you feel David's [[butthurt]]}} | ||
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== From Fucking Team to Fucked Team? == | == From Fucking Team to Fucked Team? == | ||
[[ | [[Dipshit | David Vincenzetti]] was acting like such a complete douchebag to the point that it could not be tolerated anymore. {{twitter|GammaGroupPR|Phineas Fisher}} decided that [[True | enough was enough]] and that [[Raid | it was about time someone gave Fucking Team an ass-fucking of their own]]. So using his/her (wouldn't it be funny [[Yes | if Phineas Fisher was a girl?]]) ub3r-l33t ski11z, Phineas pretty much destroyed Fucked Team by [https://leaksource.info/2015/07/07/hacking-team-hacked-400gb-data-dump-of-internal-documents-emails-source-code-from-notorious-spyware-dealer/ dumping 400 gigabytes of their internal data onto the interwebz.] Phineas was able to root Fucked Team by [[Oh Exploitable | exploiting]] a zero-day vulnerability in one of their routers. Then, thanks to the incompetence of [[Moron | Christian Pozzi]] (one of Fucked Teams sysadmins) and the fact that Fucked Team [[Fail | could not be bothered to patch their software]], Phineas was able to get access to all of their [[Docs | emails]], [[Docs | infrastructure documentation]], [[Docs | software]], [[Docs | source code]], and even [http://hacking.technology/Hacked%20Team/FileServer/FileServer/OLD%20Fileserver/books/CHITARRA/ pirated books on music.] | ||
[[Image:Hacked-Team-FinFisher-Wannabe.png | thumb | 500px | center | It could be worse, FinFisher could be wannabe musicians]] | [[Image:Hacked-Team-FinFisher-Wannabe.png | thumb | 500px | center | It could be worse, FinFisher could be wannabe musicians]] | ||
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And how could [[Awesome | this article]] be complete if we didn't shame and humiliate [[Chris-chan]]'s botched clone Christian Pozzi? Yes, the man who used the [[Stupid | genius]] password of "P4ssword", this alone is enough to laugh Pozzi out of the entire InfoSec community for good, and the only people who would take this [[faggot]] [[retard]] seriously is Fucked Team and VinCUNTzetti. But hey, you're encouraged to check out the Pozzi gallery of fail. | And how could [[Awesome | this article]] be complete if we didn't shame and humiliate [[Chris-chan]]'s botched clone Christian Pozzi? Yes, the man who used the [[Stupid | genius]] password of "P4ssword", this alone is enough to laugh Pozzi out of the entire InfoSec community for good, and the only people who would take this [[faggot]] [[retard]] seriously is Fucked Team and VinCUNTzetti. But hey, you're encouraged to check out the Pozzi gallery of fail. | ||
{{cg|Christian-Chan Pozzi Gallery of Fail|HT1|center|<gallery perrow="4"> | |||
<gallery> | |||
Image:Chris-Chan-Christian-Pozzi-Comparison.jpg | Okay, we know that Chris-chan looks more like [[Benthelooney]] but doesn't he [[Maybe | just kinda look like Christian Pozzi just a bit?]] | Image:Chris-Chan-Christian-Pozzi-Comparison.jpg | Okay, we know that Chris-chan looks more like [[Benthelooney]] but doesn't he [[Maybe | just kinda look like Christian Pozzi just a bit?]] | ||
Image:Christian-Pozzi-Hacked-Twitter.png | Probably [[MGTOW]] | Image:Christian-Pozzi-Hacked-Twitter.png | Probably [[MGTOW]] | ||
Image:Pozzi-Screenshot1.jpeg | Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi likes to [[Rape | play]] [[Girls | games]] | Image:Pozzi-Screenshot1.jpeg | Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi likes to [[Rape | play]] [[Girls | games]] | ||
Image:Pozzi-passwords.png | Chris-Pozzi, password management [[Noob | expert]]. | Image:Pozzi-passwords.png | Chris-Pozzi, password management [[Noob | expert]]. | ||
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="4"> | |||
Image:Pozzi-porn-list.png | Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi is [[Dying Alone | incapable of getting laid]] and must look up pr0nz to prevent himself from ending up like [[Elliot Rodger]] | Image:Pozzi-porn-list.png | Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi is [[Dying Alone | incapable of getting laid]] and must look up pr0nz to prevent himself from ending up like [[Elliot Rodger]] | ||
Image:Pozzi-Screenshot2.jpeg | Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi must shop for high-end expensive gear in order to [[Friend Zone | impress the ladies]]. | Image:Pozzi-Screenshot2.jpeg | Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi must shop for high-end expensive gear in order to [[Friend Zone | impress the ladies]]. | ||
Image:Pozzi-Screenshot3.png | Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi wants to be like that basketball player, but it ain't gonna happen. | Image:Pozzi-Screenshot3.png | Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi wants to be like that basketball player, but it ain't gonna happen. | ||
Image:Christian Pozzi Thinking About Sex.jpg | Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi [[Pervert | constantly thinks about sex.]] | Image:Christian Pozzi Thinking About Sex.jpg | Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi [[Pervert | constantly thinks about sex.]] | ||
</gallery> | </gallery>}} | ||
=== And Now The Moment You've Been Waiting For... === | === And Now The Moment You've Been Waiting For... === | ||
Fucked Team's | {{cg|Fucked Team's Super Sekret Emails|HT2|center|<gallery perrow="4"> | ||
<gallery> | |||
Image:David-Vincenzetti-Hates-Tor.png | The reason Dumbvid can't write what he thinks about EFF is because he's an inarticulate [[fuckwit]]. | Image:David-Vincenzetti-Hates-Tor.png | The reason Dumbvid can't write what he thinks about EFF is because he's an inarticulate [[fuckwit]]. | ||
Image:David-Vincenzetti-Cryptowars.png | "massively used by 'wrongdoers'" Oh what you mean by people like you? | Image:David-Vincenzetti-Cryptowars.png | "massively used by 'wrongdoers'" Oh what you mean by people like you? | ||
Image:David-Vincenzetti-Anti-PGP.png | More proof that Dopevid is a complete and utter [[retard]]. | Image:David-Vincenzetti-Anti-PGP.png | More proof that Dopevid is a complete and utter [[retard]]. | ||
Image:David-Vincenzetti-Polish-Racist.png | Oh what, did you think we were joking about David Vinsectarian being a racist? | Image:David-Vincenzetti-Polish-Racist.png | Oh what, did you think we were joking about David Vinsectarian being a racist? | ||
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="4"> | |||
Image:David Vincenzetti Wannabe Psychologist.png | David Vinsavoir-faire is also a wannabe psychologist. | Image:David Vincenzetti Wannabe Psychologist.png | David Vinsavoir-faire is also a wannabe psychologist. | ||
Image:Hacking Team Customer Service.png | Fucked Team's customer service can help even the biggest [[noob]]. | Image:Hacking Team Customer Service.png | Fucked Team's customer service can help even the biggest [[noob]]. | ||
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Image:Hacking Team HaveIBeenPwned.png | The disproportionally high levels of [[fail]] is just too much for us to handle. | Image:Hacking Team HaveIBeenPwned.png | The disproportionally high levels of [[fail]] is just too much for us to handle. | ||
Image:Hacking Team Murder Thread.png | Fucked Up Team staff threaten to murder {{twitter|csoghoian|Christopher Soghoian}} | Image:Hacking Team Murder Thread.png | Fucked Up Team staff threaten to murder {{twitter|csoghoian|Christopher Soghoian}} | ||
</gallery> | </gallery>}} | ||
=== Failing Team Fails at Damage Control === | === Failing Team Fails at Damage Control === | ||
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<br/> | <br/> | ||
[[Image:Hacking Team Client Wiki.jpg | thumb | 200px | center | [[Bullshit | Fucked Team totally doesn't sell to Ethiopia, UAE, Sudan, Egypt, Mexico, Malaysia, Nigeria, Russia, Saudi Arabia, Oman and other shitty nations.]]]] | [[Image:Hacking Team Client Wiki.jpg | thumb | 200px | center | [[Bullshit | Fucked Team totally doesn't sell to Ethiopia, UAE, Sudan, Egypt, Mexico, Malaysia, Nigeria, Russia, Saudi Arabia, Oman and other shitty nations.]]]] | ||
<br/> | |||
== A PSA from Encyclopedia Dramatica == | |||
David Vinconzetti and Ripoff Team did _NOT_ invent the techniques found within their shitty spyware kit "Galileo RCS". Just like how [[Fact | Johnny Test ripped off Dexter's Lab,]] Ripoff Team has pretty much been ripping off tools from [[Woz | real hackers.]] They [http://www.forbes.com/sites/thomasbrewster/2015/07/23/plagiarizing-malware/ even plagiarize other programmers code.] So the [[Security Faggots | security experts]] over at [[Encyclopedia Dramatica | ED]] will be providing [[Soviet Union | governments]] and [[You | independent researchers]] with this alternative DIY kit: <br/><br/> | |||
<center> | |||
{| | |||
! RCS component | |||
! Free Alternative | |||
! Who really invented it? | |||
|- | |||
| Software Implant | |||
| [https://github.com/burke/zeus Zeus] [https://github.com/chokepoint/Jynx2 Jynx2] | |||
| [http://phrack.org/issues/55/5.html Greg Hoglund] | |||
|- | |||
| Intelligence Module | |||
| [https://www.paterva.com/web6/products/maltego.php Maltego] | |||
| [http://hfs.sagepub.com/content/17/2/157.abstract Walter Harper and Douglas Harris] | |||
|- | |||
| Tactical Network Injector | |||
| [http://su2.info/doc/arpspoof.php Arpspoof] | |||
| [http://security.stackexchange.com/questions/78843/origins-of-the-man-in-the-middle-analysis Leslie Lamport] | |||
|- | |||
| QR Code Hacking | |||
| [http://www.qrhacker.com/ qrhacker.com] | |||
| [[th3j35t3r]] | |||
|- | |||
| Injection Proxy | |||
| [http://www.squid-cache.org/ Squid Proxy] | |||
| [http://www.amazon.com/Firewalls-Internet-Security-Repelling-Hacker/dp/020163466X William R. Cheswick] | |||
|- | |||
| Zero-Day Exploits | |||
| [http://metasploit.com Metasploit] [http://0day.today 1337day] | |||
| [http://insecure.org/stf/smashstack.html Aleph One] | |||
|- | |||
| Hacking Team Consultancy | |||
| [http://hackforums.net HackForums] | |||
| [[Skid | Jesse Labrocca]] | |||
|} | |||
</center> | |||
<br/> | |||
[[Image:Vincenzetti The More You Know.png | thumb | 500px | center | David's biggest fear is that people will realize that his [[Bullshit | products]] are more worthless than Ms. Trunchbull's used car.]] | |||
<br/> | |||
{{quote|Their motives are the same as those of sensationalist writers of 150 years ago — get readers and let the truth be damned.|Yeah David and the truth is that you're a [[Brett Keane | scam artist]].}} | |||
<br/> | <br/> | ||
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== David Vincenzetti: L. Ron Hubbard Wannabe == | == David Vincenzetti: L. Ron Hubbard Wannabe == | ||
[[Image:Mostapha-Maanna-Stalker.png | 175px | thumb | right | Doesn't Italy [http://www.thedailybeast.com/witw/articles/2013/08/09/italy-passes-new-anti-domestic-violence-laws-to-combat-femicide-epidemic.html have an anti-cyberstalking law?]]] | [[Image:Mostapha-Maanna-Stalker.png | 175px | thumb | right | Doesn't Italy [http://www.thedailybeast.com/witw/articles/2013/08/09/italy-passes-new-anti-domestic-violence-laws-to-combat-femicide-epidemic.html have an anti-cyberstalking law?]]] | ||
David really shouldn't be calling his competitors "wannabes" since he has been trying to copy [[Scientology]] ever since [[Awesome | Phineas Fisher]] [[Pwned | humiliated]] him. After listening to the Blame Canada song from the South Park Movie, Gayvid decided to [[Batshit Insane | blame six of his former employees for the leaks]]. And like any good cult leader, he [[Creepy | hired private investigators to stalk said employees]]. Now, the levels of idiocy and fail are just off the charts. David's stupidity knows no bounds and it's at the point that even [[ | David really shouldn't be calling his competitors "wannabes" since he has been trying to copy [[Scientology]] ever since [[Awesome | Phineas Fisher]] [[Pwned | humiliated]] him. After listening to the Blame Canada song from the South Park Movie, Gayvid decided to [[Batshit Insane | blame six of his former employees for the leaks]]. And like any good cult leader, he [[Creepy | hired private investigators to stalk said employees]]. Now, the levels of idiocy and fail are just off the charts. David's stupidity knows no bounds and it's at the point that even [[Justin Bieber]] and [[Shane Dawson]] looks like Einstein and Richard Feynman compared to this [[Retard | mentally challenged]] [[Richard Dawkins | lobotomized baboon]]. David also might be a [[schizo]] [[aspie]], as he believes that one of his former employees, [[Cool | Alberto Pelliccione]] left the company to develop his own company to [[troll]] his shitty company. His evidence? What evidence? Fucking Team is a cult, remember? And like any cult, empirical proof is widely frowned upon. | ||
<br/><br/><br/><br/> | <br/><br/><br/><br/> | ||
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=== The Italian Morons Think We Care About Their Opinion === | === The Italian Morons Think We Care About Their Opinion === | ||
Eric Rabe, Fucked Team's PR manager, apparently thinks that other people care about his [[Uncyclopedia | asinine]] opinions. He even went out of his way to write {{archive|atUDU|this}} piece of shit article on their website: | [[JDubs | Eric Rabe]], Fucked Team's PR manager, apparently thinks that other people care about his [[Uncyclopedia | asinine]] opinions. He even went out of his way to write {{archive|atUDU|this}} piece of shit article on their website: | ||
{{quote|The founders of the United States were perhaps even more deeply committed than Apple to protecting the citizenry, since they had just fought a war on American soil to assure civil rights including privacy. Yet they could see the need for legal searches in pursuit of law enforcement to assure public safety. So, in the new country’s Constitution, they outlined a process for safeguarding rights while allowing searches.|Eric Rabe fails at understanding 3rd grade social studies}} | {{quote|The founders of the United States were perhaps even more deeply committed than Apple to protecting the citizenry, since they had just fought a war on American soil to assure civil rights including privacy. Yet they could see the need for legal searches in pursuit of law enforcement to assure public safety. So, in the new country’s Constitution, they outlined a process for safeguarding rights while allowing searches.|Eric Rabe fails at understanding 3rd grade social studies}} | ||
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{{quote|The presentation was crappy, their [source] code is available [online], and they have lots of technical limitations.|Well what do you expect? It's Fucked Team after all.}} | {{quote|The presentation was crappy, their [source] code is available [online], and they have lots of technical limitations.|Well what do you expect? It's Fucked Team after all.}} | ||
Like [[Brett Keane]] and his [[Fantard | fanbase]], Fucked Team wont go away. They appear to be vampires that feast on the blood of [[idiots]] willing to fork over one million euro for their garbage products and they wont die without a fight. | |||
{{quote|Our technology is now even more invisible, and stronger than before.|David | {{quote|Our technology is now even more invisible, and stronger than before.|David Vincuntzetti [[Fail | tries]] to scam people.}} | ||
=== The Italian Morons Lose Their Export Licence === | === The Italian Morons Lose Their Export Licence === | ||
[[oneone | OH MY FREAKING GOD THANK YOU JESUS. PRAISE THE LORD JESUS CHRIST. FUCKED TEAM GOT THEIR LICENSE SUSPENDED HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1]] [http://www.forbes.com/sites/thomasbrewster/2016/04/06/hacking-team-loses-sales-license/ check it out!] | [[oneone | OH MY FREAKING GOD THANK YOU JESUS. PRAISE THE LORD JESUS CHRIST. FUCKED TEAM GOT THEIR LICENSE SUSPENDED HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1]] [http://www.forbes.com/sites/thomasbrewster/2016/04/06/hacking-team-loses-sales-license/ check it out!] | ||
[[Image:Hacking-team-forbes.png | center | 500px]] | [[Image:Hacking-team-forbes-lol.png | center | 500px]] | ||
=== The Italian Morons Get Humiliated By Phineas Fisher Again === | === The Italian Morons Get Humiliated By Phineas Fisher Again === | ||
So {{twitter|GammaGroupPR|Phineas Fisher}} just published {{pastebin|0SNSvyjJ|the rundown}} on how he destroyed Fucking Team and downgraded it to Fucked Team. Gayvid | So {{twitter|GammaGroupPR|Phineas Fisher}} just published {{pastebin|0SNSvyjJ|the rundown}} on how he destroyed Fucking Team and downgraded it to Fucked Team. Gayvid Vincuntzetti, being the opportunist turd-flinging mentally handicapped monkey that he is, {{archive|jYewP|tried to respond looking cool}} but [[Epic Fail | ends up looking even more retarded than if he just left it alone]]. | ||
{{quote|[[ | {{quote|[[U_MAD | The worst of today’s news media continue their unfair and inaccurate vilification of Hacking Team. The latest comes in the wake of a self-promoting essay by someone who claims responsibility for last summer’s attack on this company. The essay writer claims to explain how he executed the attack, but inaccuracies in his story only go to show he is not really as smart as he thinks he is.]]|If failure was made out of strawberries, we would be drinking a lot of smoothies right now.}} | ||
Also note how Mr. Vincenzetti assumes that Phineas Fisher is a man (Vincenzetti uses "he" in the response). This proves Vincenzetti to be a [[sexist]] pig and an [[Sargon of Akkad | over-privileged white cis gendered man]] who exploits his privilege to [[Ted Bundy | physically and sexually abuse women]]. I hope your happy with yourself David. Please show Vincenzetti's shit article to the nearest [[Anita Sarkeesian | feminist]] in the room and ask him/her what s/he thinks. | Also note how Mr. Vincenzetti assumes that Phineas Fisher is a man (Vincenzetti uses "he" in the response). This proves Vincenzetti to be a [[sexist]] pig and an [[Sargon of Akkad | over-privileged white cis gendered man]] who exploits his privilege to [[Ted Bundy | physically and sexually abuse women]]. I hope your happy with yourself David. Please show Vincenzetti's shit article to the nearest [[Anita Sarkeesian | feminist]] in the room and ask him/her what s/he thinks. | ||
=== The Italian Morons Try To Crack Tor Again... === | === The Italian Morons Try To Crack Tor Again... === | ||
[[Obvious | ....and they couldn't have failed any harder.]] David | [[Obvious | ....and they couldn't have failed any harder.]] David Vinwannabezetti [http://foreignpolicy.com/2016/04/26/fear-this-man-cyber-warfare-hacking-team-david-vincenzetti/ once again pays a "news" organization] ({{archive|zTRbR|archive}}) to pimp up his [[Clusterfuck | company]] and [[bullshit]] products that even [[your mom]] can outsmart. This time, Vincopyzetti decides to rip off Sam DeFabbia-Kane's (who hails from [[College | Wesleyan University]]) [http://wesscholar.wesleyan.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1711&context=etd_hon_theses undergrad thesis] on [[TL;DR | correlation analysis to determine users of the Tor network.]] Of course, Vinripoffzetti's [[Chinese | cheap knock-off]] won't be as good as the original, and therefore he has to pay "news" outlets to shit out an "article" that will peddle it to [[Japan | unsuspecting morons]]. | ||
{{quote|To spies, David Vincenzetti is a salesman. To tyrants, he is a savior. How the Italian mogul built a hacking empire.|Okay, David is [[No | BY NO MEANS a mogul]]}} | {{quote|To spies, David Vincenzetti is a salesman. To tyrants, he is a savior. How the Italian mogul built a hacking empire.|Okay, David is [[No | BY NO MEANS a mogul]]}} | ||
{{quote|Fear This Man|[[Moar]] like "[[Rape | fuck]] this man"}} | |||
{{quote|“I can put a box in this room which will decode all your encrypted traffic on the fly,” he tells me. “Logins, passwords, locations, real user name, real site names…. It’s black magic.”|My Little David, Plagiarism Is Magic}} | |||
{{quote|He is nothing if not militant about what he defines as justice: Julian Assange, the embattled founder of WikiLeaks, is “a criminal who by all means should be arrested, expatriated to the United States, and judged there”; whistleblower Chelsea Manning is “another lunatic”; Edward Snowden “should go to jail, absolutely.”|David, we've been over this, [[noone]] cares about your worthless, backwards, [[Dumbass | asinine]] "opinions".}} | {{quote|He is nothing if not militant about what he defines as justice: Julian Assange, the embattled founder of WikiLeaks, is “a criminal who by all means should be arrested, expatriated to the United States, and judged there”; whistleblower Chelsea Manning is “another lunatic”; Edward Snowden “should go to jail, absolutely.”|David, we've been over this, [[noone]] cares about your worthless, backwards, [[Dumbass | asinine]] "opinions".}} | ||
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== VincenzettiSpeak™ == | == VincenzettiSpeak™ == | ||
David has something to say to you: <br/><br/> | David has something to say to you: <br/><br/> | ||
[[ | [[Daniel Brandt | Ciao bella gente. Sai, queste società di informazione sono odiare su mia azienda solo perché rendono più facile per i governi oppressivi per perseguitare persone innocenti e più facile per gli artisti pick-up per inseguire le donne casuali. Questa vergine, Phineas Fisher (che tra l'altro non potrà mai fare sesso in vita sua), aveva appena a rovinare tutto. La mia azienda è stata solo facendo un sacco di soldi e Phineas violato la mia azienda e trapelato tutte le mie email a internet. Ma ciò che la gente non sa è che io sono il numero uno al mondo degli hacker. Vendo il più avanzato di hacking toolkit nel mercato nero. Ho tutti l'uomo signore, perché non solo io sono un hacker superstar, io sono anche un ragazzo superstar di karate cintura nera e la ginnastica. Phineas è solo gelatina che ho più figa di lui. Quello che ancora mi sconcerta è che le persone sono così dio-dannati ignorante in questi giorni. Perché non può la gente semplicemente rendersi conto che abbiamo bisogno di passare ad uno stato fascista. Voglio dire, non sei d'accordo con me quando dico che Mussolni era il più grande polician mai creato dal creatore. Non vuoi vivere in una nazione in cui si ottiene gettato in prigione per avere un'opinione diversa dalla media? Una nazione in cui è possibile cagna-schiaffeggiare tua moglie e non ha in galera per la cosiddetta "violenza domestica". Una nazione in cui i servizi pubblici piccoli come "educazione" e "assistenza sanitaria" sono sostituiti con survellience di massa e una polizia segreta. Una nazione dove il governo sa tutto quello che state pensando e se anche solo pensare la cosa sbagliata, ti verrà eseguito. Una nazione dove essere un non-eterosessuale otterrà il culo caramelle gettato nella grande casa. Io sogno di vivere in un paese come questo. Hitler ... err ... voglio dire Mussolni ... err ... voglio dire Dio benedica l'America.]] | ||
<br/><br/> | <br/><br/> | ||
[[ | [[David Miscarriage | boia chi vende RCS]] | ||
<br/><br/> | <br/><br/> | ||
<center> | <center> | ||
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</center> | </center> | ||
<br/><br/> | <br/><br/> | ||
== How to Troll David Vincenzetti == | == How to Troll David Vincenzetti == | ||
* | *Inform his potential customers that they can [[Duh | just download Metasploit for free.]] | ||
*Show his potential customers Fucking Team's ED page. | |||
*Show him his company's ED page. | |||
*Remind him of his [[Fat | weight problems.]] | |||
*Remind him to drive safely. | |||
*When serving him food, purposely make him wait long for it. | |||
*Tell him that [[VenomFangX]] has a higher IQ than he does. | |||
*Tell him that FinFisher was there first and that Galileo RCS is a ripoff of FinSpy. | |||
*Tell him that [[Truth | his cooking sucks.]] | |||
*Tell him that [[lol | Italy sucks at soccer and will lose to Germany.]] | |||
*Tell him that [[Truth | burning one million euro is a better investment than RCS.]] | *Tell him that [[Truth | burning one million euro is a better investment than RCS.]] | ||
*Tell him that he's the retarded offspring of Brett Keane and [[Michelle Malkin]]. | *Tell him that he's the retarded offspring of Brett Keane and [[Michelle Malkin]]. | ||
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*Ask him to help you setup your RCS C&C server. | *Ask him to help you setup your RCS C&C server. | ||
*Ask him [[Yes | if he still masturbates to Julian Assange.]] | *Ask him [[Yes | if he still masturbates to Julian Assange.]] | ||
*Ask him if he still has aspirations of being a | *Ask him if he still has aspirations of being a gymnastics star / musician. | ||
*Ask him if [[Yes | he's gay.]] | *Ask him if [[Yes | he's gay.]] | ||
* | *[[Sexual Harassment | Ask him to suck your dick.]] He might do it for the right price. | ||
== In mancanza Galleria Fail del team == | == In mancanza Galleria Fail del team == | ||
<gallery> | {{cg|Ricorda queste brutto come Faces Cazzo|HT3|center|<gallery perrow="4"> | ||
Image:Simonetta-Gallucci-LinkedIn-ProfilePic.jpg | [[True | Hacking Team is so sexist]] that they even have female MGTOW. | Image:Simonetta-Gallucci-LinkedIn-ProfilePic.jpg | [[True | Hacking Team is so sexist]] that they even have female MGTOW. | ||
Image:Alessandro-Scarafile-LinkedIn-ProfilePic.jpg | Alessandro Scarafile? [[Moar]] Liek Alessandro Pedophile. | Image:Alessandro-Scarafile-LinkedIn-ProfilePic.jpg | Alessandro Scarafile? [[Moar]] Liek Alessandro Pedophile. | ||
Image:Hacking-Team-Hacked-Twitter.png | Phineas Fisher giving Hacking Team's twitter [[SOHH | a hawt new face lift]] | Image:Hacking-Team-Hacked-Twitter.png | Phineas Fisher giving Hacking Team's twitter [[SOHH | a hawt new face lift]] | ||
Image:Hacking-Team-South-America-Proliferation.jpg | Hacking Team [[Bullshit | totally doesn't sell to evil countries]] | Image:Hacking-Team-South-America-Proliferation.jpg | Hacking Team [[Bullshit | totally doesn't sell to evil countries]] | ||
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="4"> | |||
Image:Vincenzetti-OC-Pony.png | David Vincenzetti's [[Gay | OC Pony]] | Image:Vincenzetti-OC-Pony.png | David Vincenzetti's [[Gay | OC Pony]] | ||
Image:Phineas-Fisher-Tweet.png | Go Phineas Fisher Go! | Image:Phineas-Fisher-Tweet.png | Go Phineas Fisher Go! | ||
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Image:Dunce-Vincenzetti.jpg | [[ Dumbass | Dunce Vincenzetti]] | Image:Dunce-Vincenzetti.jpg | [[ Dumbass | Dunce Vincenzetti]] | ||
Image:Hacking-Team-Faggot-Ad.png | Hacking Team employs faggots to make their [[shitty | lousy]] ads. | Image:Hacking-Team-Faggot-Ad.png | Hacking Team employs faggots to make their [[shitty | lousy]] ads. | ||
Image:Hacking-Team-Warcorpse666.jpeg | Meet Hacking Team's Android developer: {{ | Image:Hacking-Team-Warcorpse666.jpeg | Meet Hacking Team's Android developer: {{yt|u|Warcorpse666|Warcorpse666}} | ||
Image:Harry-Wormwood.jpg | David Vincenzetti's illegitimate brother [http://villains.wikia.com/wiki/Harry_Wormwood Harry Wormwood] | Image:Harry-Wormwood.jpg | David Vincenzetti's illegitimate brother [http://villains.wikia.com/wiki/Harry_Wormwood Harry Wormwood] | ||
Image:Ryan-Wiley.jpeg | Meet Eric Rabe's assistant: {{ | Image:Ryan-Wiley.jpeg | Meet Eric Rabe's assistant: {{yt|u|rdubwiley|Ryan Wiley}} | ||
Image:HT-RCS-Protection.png | Hacking Team's [https://github.com/hackedteam/rcs-db/blob/master/lib/rcs-db/heartbeat.rb brilliant way of scaring off pirates.] | Image:HT-RCS-Protection.png | Hacking Team's [https://github.com/hackedteam/rcs-db/blob/master/lib/rcs-db/heartbeat.rb brilliant way of scaring off pirates.] | ||
Image:HackedTeam-Logo.png | [[Google | Jewgle]] using the "Hacked Team" parody logo. | Image:HackedTeam-Logo.png | [[Google | Jewgle]] using the "Hacked Team" parody logo. | ||
Image:Magical Brett.gif | The [[Brett Keane | American version]] of David Vincenzetti. | Image:Magical Brett.gif | The [[Brett Keane | American version]] of David Vincenzetti. | ||
Image:HT-RCS-Its-A-Trap.png | [[IT'S A TRAP]] | Image:HT-RCS-Its-A-Trap.png | [[IT'S A TRAP]] | ||
</gallery> | </gallery>}} | ||
<br /> | |||
{{cg|Meme Team|HT4|center|<gallery perrow="4"> | |||
<gallery> | |||
Image:Drunk Vincenzetti.jpg | [[Drunk | Drunk Vincenzetti]] | Image:Drunk Vincenzetti.jpg | [[Drunk | Drunk Vincenzetti]] | ||
Image:Futurama Fry Is Vincenzetti Insane or Retarded.jpg | [[SammyClassicSonicFan | Probably Both]] | Image:Futurama Fry Is Vincenzetti Insane or Retarded.jpg | [[SammyClassicSonicFan | Probably Both]] | ||
Image:Hacking Team Either Trolling Or Stupid.jpg | David's too stupid to be a [[troll]]. | Image:Hacking Team Either Trolling Or Stupid.jpg | David's too stupid to be a [[troll]]. | ||
Image:Hacking Team Revenge Meme.jpg | Yeah, right. | Image:Hacking Team Revenge Meme.jpg | Yeah, right. | ||
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="4"> | |||
Image:How can Hacking Team be security experts.jpg | I don't know where you're getting the idea that Hacking Team are experts in anything. | Image:How can Hacking Team be security experts.jpg | I don't know where you're getting the idea that Hacking Team are experts in anything. | ||
Image:How Did Phineas Fisher Pwn Hacking Team.jpg | Because Hacking Team isn't the #1, they're [[Shit | the #2]] | Image:How Did Phineas Fisher Pwn Hacking Team.jpg | Because Hacking Team isn't the #1, they're [[Shit | the #2]] | ||
Image:Vincenzetti Calls Phineas Fisher Stupid Meme.jpg | David is the very definition of [[irony]]. | Image:Vincenzetti Calls Phineas Fisher Stupid Meme.jpg | David is the very definition of [[irony]]. | ||
Image:Vincenzetti Irony Meme 1.jpg | David has the right to hack other people because he's the reincarnation of [http://wikipedia.org/wiki/Madison_Grant racist superstar Madison Grant] | Image:Vincenzetti Irony Meme 1.jpg | David has the right to hack other people because he's the reincarnation of [http://wikipedia.org/wiki/Madison_Grant racist superstar Madison Grant] | ||
</gallery> | </gallery>}} | ||
<br /> | |||
{{cg|[[Rule 34|Pornografico Collezione del team un cazzo]]|HT5|center|<gallery perrow="4"> | |||
<gallery> | |||
Image:Hacking-Team-Rule34-1.jpg | Congratulations to Simonetta Gallucci for getting into the front cover of [[Brony | PlayPony]]. | Image:Hacking-Team-Rule34-1.jpg | Congratulations to Simonetta Gallucci for getting into the front cover of [[Brony | PlayPony]]. | ||
Image:Tara-Strong-Fucking-Vincenzetti.jpg | Let's hope that Mrs. Vincenzetti doesn't find out about this. | Image:Tara-Strong-Fucking-Vincenzetti.jpg | Let's hope that Mrs. Vincenzetti doesn't find out about this. | ||
Image:Hacking-Team-Rule34-2.jpg | David Vincenzetti trying to bait [[13 year old boys]] | Image:Hacking-Team-Rule34-2.jpg | David Vincenzetti trying to bait [[13 year old boys]] | ||
Image:Hacking-Team-Rule34-3.jpg | David Vincenzetti and Alessandro Scarafile making an [[Porn | advertisement]] about Galileo RCS. | Image:Hacking-Team-Rule34-3.jpg | David Vincenzetti and Alessandro Scarafile making an [[Porn | advertisement]] about Galileo RCS. | ||
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="4"> | |||
Image:Hacking-Team-Rule34-4.jpg | Ahh Vintage Italian Porn. | Image:Hacking-Team-Rule34-4.jpg | Ahh Vintage Italian Porn. | ||
</gallery> | </gallery>}} | ||
== Hacking Team's D0x == | == Hacking Team's D0x == | ||
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*[[HBGary Federal]] | *[[HBGary Federal]] | ||
*[[Kevin Mitnick]] | *[[Kevin Mitnick]] | ||
*[[Brett Keane]] - David Vinconzetti's American Counterpart | |||
*[[Jenny McDermott]] - David Vinwannabeayetti is copying Jenny McDermott. | |||
*[[AnimatedJames]] - Hacking Team regular | *[[AnimatedJames]] - Hacking Team regular | ||
*[[Benthelooney]] - Another Hacking Team regular | *[[Benthelooney]] - Another Hacking Team regular | ||
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*[https://wikileaks.org/hackingteam/emails/emailid/510276 Are Fucking Team Staff Cloppers?] | *[https://wikileaks.org/hackingteam/emails/emailid/510276 Are Fucking Team Staff Cloppers?] | ||
*[http://www.adaptivemobile.com/blog/can-they-hear-you-now-hacking-team-ss7 David Vincenzetti doesn't understand irony] | *[http://www.adaptivemobile.com/blog/can-they-hear-you-now-hacking-team-ss7 David Vincenzetti doesn't understand irony] | ||
*[http://github.com/hackedteam RCS Sauce] | *[http://github.com/hackedteam RCS Sekret Sauce] | ||
*{{linkedin|in/vincenzetti|Dickweed David's LinkedIn}} | *[http://s000.tinyupload.com/index.php?file_id=25736802429037879870 Hacking Team 400gb Dump] [http://www.filedropper.com/ha2edteam /b/ackup] | ||
*{{linkedin|in/christian-pozzi-61711321|Chris-chan's botched twin's LinkedIn}} | *{{linkedin|in/vincenzetti|Dickweed David's LinkedIn}} {{archive|gs26X|/b/ackup}} | ||
*{{linkedin|in/simonetta-gallucci-09314512|Some dumb bitch, probably an accountant}} | *{{linkedin|in/christian-pozzi-61711321|Chris-chan's botched twin's LinkedIn}} {{archive|JlFIj|/b/ackup}} | ||
*{{linkedin|in/alessandroscarafile|Another Hacking Fag's LinkedIn}} | *{{linkedin|in/simonetta-gallucci-09314512|Some dumb bitch, probably an accountant}} {{archive|xzFwk|/b/ackup}} | ||
*{{linkedin|in/alessandroscarafile|Another Hacking Fag's LinkedIn}} {{archive|7Wk6Y|/b/ackup}} | |||
*{{twitter|hackingteam|Fucking Team's Twitter Account}} | *{{twitter|hackingteam|Fucking Team's Twitter Account}} | ||
*{{twitter|ericrabe|Eric Rabe's Twitter Account which he uses to talk to himself}} | *{{twitter|ericrabe|Eric Rabe's Twitter Account which he uses to talk to himself}} | ||
*{{pastebin|0SNSvyjJ|You too can become a hacktivist!}} | *{{pastebin|0SNSvyjJ|You too can become a hacktivist!}} | ||
*[https://forum.encyclopediadramatica. | *[https://forum.encyclopediadramatica.rs/threads/hacking-team-needs-a-waambulance.22525/ EDiots begin busting Fucking Team's chops] | ||
{{SecurityFaggots}} | |||
{{timeline|Featured article April 28 & 29, [[2016]]|[[ShoutYourStatus]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Trigglypuff]]}} | |||
{{Corner|br|[[File:hitler.gif|100px]]}} | |||
{{Category: Security Faggotry}} |
Latest revision as of 07:49, 13 January 2023
#hackedteam |
Hacking Team (also known as Hacked Team, Fucking Team, Fucked Team, Failing Team, Failed Team, Faggot Team or Mussolini 2: Reloaded S. r. l) is a shitty computer "security" company that, like HBGary Federal, bills itself as the national guard of the internets. They basically sell their own fake and gay version of SubSeven called Galileo RCS, which is supposedly used to cyberstalk criminals and terrorists, but it was found out that its main use was to stalk and harass journalists. HT is 100 per cent Italy-based which means that most of its staff and engineers are anti-Semitic and racist against black people and support Adolf Hitler for president. Last Thursday HT got 400 gigabytes of their internal data leaked by Phineas Fisher, and holy fucking shit was this leak an epic win.
Birth of Snake Oil Salesmen
Hacking Team Theme Song
IMPORTANT: YOU MUST LISTEN TO THE HACKING TEAM THEME SONG FOR THE FULL VINCENZETTI™ EXPERIENCE
Fucking Team Gains Momentum
Shit for brains and all-in-all failure of a human being David Vincenzetti became the CEO of HT and begins promoting the hell out of it. He came up with the "brilliant" idea of a ub3r-l33t hacking kit called Galileo RCS that he could sell to governments that are too stupid to download Metasploit for free. David, being the shameless self-promoting piece of shit that he is, pays The Telegraph $5 to write a fluff piece ( archive) about his dumbass hacking kit. Apparently, RCS "could prove deadlier than any missile" and "[it's] so powerful it could bring a country to its knees". The article also mentions that David is "a law-abiding businessman", that he "isn’t your typical arms dealer" and that "he follows strict ethical guidelines". Uh, David, paying The Telegraph to suck your dick isn't exactly following strict ethical guidelines. Oh, and hijacking IP address ranges that you don't own isn't really the behavior of a law-abiding businessman. Also, plagiarizing other programmers code isn't really helping your case for following strict ethical guidelines. Yeah, this "article", if you even want to call it that, is more than enough proof that David Vincenzetti is the Italian version of Brett Keane.
CitizenLab Investigates
In October 2012, the hipster hackers over at CitizenLab finally realize that Fucking Team is trying to rip-off Masters of Deception and CitizenLab simply ain't gonna have it. So they began tracking Fucking Team's shitty spyware and published their findings here. Fucking Team claims that RCS is "untraceable" when ex-filtrating data on your computer back to the pigs. HT says that their 7 proxies makes this possible, but as CitizenLab has demonstrated, this is complete bullshit and lusers of RCS should sue Fucking Team to the stone age for false advertising.
—Hope you got good lawyers David :) |
CitizenLab also found out that the software might be used by oppressive regimes such as Sudan, Uzbekistan, and Saudi Arabia. Analysts over at ED also have some evidence that they might be selling to North Korea and even ISIS. Dickhead David's "strict ethical guidelines" aren't really that ethical after all.
—CitizenLab pwning HT |
Drama with Lorenzo Franceschi-Bicchierai
While CitizenLab did a pretty decent job of making Fucking Team look like complete twats, the real lulz came from Motherboard VICE writer Lorenzo Franceschi-Bicchierai who has been documenting their bullshit since March 2015. Lorenzo began with this article documenting how Fucking Team customer Ethiopia was abusing RCS to spy on journalists. However, shit started to get srs when he posted another article talking about how Fucking Team's spyware was probably being abused by the U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency to spy on random people suspected to be junkies. This article was probably enough to provoke our hero Phineas Fisher (who previously ass-raped Gamma Group) to go out and fuck up Fucking Team. A couple of months later, Fucking Team proposed a method of "De-anonymizing" the Tor network. Knowing that pretty much every claim that came out of Fucking Team's mouth was going to end in an epic fail, Lorenzo decided to write about it. It was here that everyone's favorite Jenny McDermott wannabe, David Vincenzetti, decided to respond:
—Ohh can you feel David's butthurt |
—Whatever |
From Fucking Team to Fucked Team?
David Vincenzetti was acting like such a complete douchebag to the point that it could not be tolerated anymore. Phineas Fisher decided that enough was enough and that it was about time someone gave Fucking Team an ass-fucking of their own. So using his/her (wouldn't it be funny if Phineas Fisher was a girl?) ub3r-l33t ski11z, Phineas pretty much destroyed Fucked Team by dumping 400 gigabytes of their internal data onto the interwebz. Phineas was able to root Fucked Team by exploiting a zero-day vulnerability in one of their routers. Then, thanks to the incompetence of Christian Pozzi (one of Fucked Teams sysadmins) and the fact that Fucked Team could not be bothered to patch their software, Phineas was able to get access to all of their emails, infrastructure documentation, software, source code, and even pirated books on music.
Taking The Piss out of Christian Pozzi
And how could this article be complete if we didn't shame and humiliate Chris-chan's botched clone Christian Pozzi? Yes, the man who used the genius password of "P4ssword", this alone is enough to laugh Pozzi out of the entire InfoSec community for good, and the only people who would take this faggot retard seriously is Fucked Team and VinCUNTzetti. But hey, you're encouraged to check out the Pozzi gallery of fail.
-
Okay, we know that Chris-chan looks more like Benthelooney but doesn't he just kinda look like Christian Pozzi just a bit?
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Probably MGTOW
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Chris-Pozzi, password management expert.
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Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi is incapable of getting laid and must look up pr0nz to prevent himself from ending up like Elliot Rodger
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Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi must shop for high-end expensive gear in order to impress the ladies.
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Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi wants to be like that basketball player, but it ain't gonna happen.
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Like Chris-chan, Chris-Pozzi constantly thinks about sex.
And Now The Moment You've Been Waiting For...
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The reason Dumbvid can't write what he thinks about EFF is because he's an inarticulate fuckwit.
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"massively used by 'wrongdoers'" Oh what you mean by people like you?
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More proof that Dopevid is a complete and utter retard.
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Oh what, did you think we were joking about David Vinsectarian being a racist?
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David Vinsavoir-faire is also a wannabe psychologist.
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Fucked Team's customer service can help even the biggest noob.
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What better time to execute the crisis procedure than July 2015?
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Fucked Team also sells to chinks.
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The disproportionally high levels of fail is just too much for us to handle.
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Fucked Up Team staff threaten to murder Christopher Soghoian
Failing Team Fails at Damage Control
Minutes after the leak, Fucked Team tried to stop the awesomeness that is the Internet Hate Machine. Noobvid Vinfailzetti did everything in his power, such as launching DDoS attacks and sending death threats. The DDoS was traced back to Italy and Dickvid's death threats were easily sniffed out.
Well Thank You Captain Obvious
It turns out that the leaked Fucked Team emails prove without a shadow of a doubt that they were selling their bullshit surveillance tools to oppressive regimes like the ones mentioned above.
Lusers of Galileo RCS
A PSA from Encyclopedia Dramatica
David Vinconzetti and Ripoff Team did _NOT_ invent the techniques found within their shitty spyware kit "Galileo RCS". Just like how Johnny Test ripped off Dexter's Lab, Ripoff Team has pretty much been ripping off tools from real hackers. They even plagiarize other programmers code. So the security experts over at ED will be providing governments and independent researchers with this alternative DIY kit:
RCS component | Free Alternative | Who really invented it? |
---|---|---|
Software Implant | Zeus Jynx2 | Greg Hoglund |
Intelligence Module | Maltego | Walter Harper and Douglas Harris |
Tactical Network Injector | Arpspoof | Leslie Lamport |
QR Code Hacking | qrhacker.com | th3j35t3r |
Injection Proxy | Squid Proxy | William R. Cheswick |
Zero-Day Exploits | Metasploit 1337day | Aleph One |
Hacking Team Consultancy | HackForums | Jesse Labrocca |
—Yeah David and the truth is that you're a scam artist. |
ZOMG DAVID VINCENZETTI USED TO BE A CRYPTOFAG
Back in the 90's when disco was still cool, David Vincenzetti was on the side of the good guys. Apparently David wasn't really much of a dickhead as he is today and did some pretty cool stuff like writing encryption software and giving hardcore security advices. But David let greed corrupt his penis and the Alzheimers spread to his brain. When you combine this with the fact that Julian Assange was getting laid faster than he could say "Julie, can't you share some of your gf's with me??!!", this is what enable David to turn to the dark side and begin building hacking tools for the pigs. It's at the point that even sex with Michelle Phan wont save poor David now.
David Vincenzetti: L. Ron Hubbard Wannabe
David really shouldn't be calling his competitors "wannabes" since he has been trying to copy Scientology ever since Phineas Fisher humiliated him. After listening to the Blame Canada song from the South Park Movie, Gayvid decided to blame six of his former employees for the leaks. And like any good cult leader, he hired private investigators to stalk said employees. Now, the levels of idiocy and fail are just off the charts. David's stupidity knows no bounds and it's at the point that even Justin Bieber and Shane Dawson looks like Einstein and Richard Feynman compared to this mentally challenged lobotomized baboon. David also might be a schizo aspie, as he believes that one of his former employees, Alberto Pelliccione left the company to develop his own company to troll his shitty company. His evidence? What evidence? Fucking Team is a cult, remember? And like any cult, empirical proof is widely frowned upon.
—Yeah but how will David get the money if he doesn't sell to those countries? |
2016: A New Year For Failing Team
Fucked Team's endless stream of failure and stupidity is the gift that never stops giving. Gayvid Vincenzetti managed to hire staff that made his "company" look even worse than ever before. And what better way to start the year with a malware analyst shitting on their spyware!.
(oh and by the way, to access that endless stream, Click Here)
The Italian Morons Are Back!
The ONLY reason that their OS X RCS had a 0/54 detection rate was because antiviruses in general is a piece of shit. But as our friend fG! was able to prove, a two-year old could have reversed this pathetic excuse of a piece of spyware and that Fucked Team were still the same crap morons since July 2015. Unfortunately, government agencies are still too stupid to actually fork over one million euro for RCS when they can just download the **FREE** Metasploit Framework which does the SAME FUCKING THING!!!1. Also, Fucked Team lied about their replacement RCS as they're still using the same codebase that was leaked.
The Italian Morons Think We Care About Their Opinion
Eric Rabe, Fucked Team's PR manager, apparently thinks that other people care about his asinine opinions. He even went out of his way to write this piece of shit article on their website:
—Eric Rabe fails at understanding 3rd grade social studies |
The Italian Morons Are Starting To Lose Business
Okay, maybe there's some shred of hope for humanity after all. Fucked Team tried to sell their shit spyware to a South African country and ended up not making a sale due to a crappy presentation.
—Well what do you expect? It's Fucked Team after all. |
Like Brett Keane and his fanbase, Fucked Team wont go away. They appear to be vampires that feast on the blood of idiots willing to fork over one million euro for their garbage products and they wont die without a fight.
—David Vincuntzetti tries to scam people. |
The Italian Morons Lose Their Export Licence
OH MY FREAKING GOD THANK YOU JESUS. PRAISE THE LORD JESUS CHRIST. FUCKED TEAM GOT THEIR LICENSE SUSPENDED HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 check it out!
The Italian Morons Get Humiliated By Phineas Fisher Again
So Phineas Fisher just published the rundown on how he destroyed Fucking Team and downgraded it to Fucked Team. Gayvid Vincuntzetti, being the opportunist turd-flinging mentally handicapped monkey that he is, tried to respond looking cool but ends up looking even more retarded than if he just left it alone.
—If failure was made out of strawberries, we would be drinking a lot of smoothies right now. |
Also note how Mr. Vincenzetti assumes that Phineas Fisher is a man (Vincenzetti uses "he" in the response). This proves Vincenzetti to be a sexist pig and an over-privileged white cis gendered man who exploits his privilege to physically and sexually abuse women. I hope your happy with yourself David. Please show Vincenzetti's shit article to the nearest feminist in the room and ask him/her what s/he thinks.
The Italian Morons Try To Crack Tor Again...
....and they couldn't have failed any harder. David Vinwannabezetti once again pays a "news" organization ( archive) to pimp up his company and bullshit products that even your mom can outsmart. This time, Vincopyzetti decides to rip off Sam DeFabbia-Kane's (who hails from Wesleyan University) undergrad thesis on correlation analysis to determine users of the Tor network. Of course, Vinripoffzetti's cheap knock-off won't be as good as the original, and therefore he has to pay "news" outlets to shit out an "article" that will peddle it to unsuspecting morons.
—Okay, David is BY NO MEANS a mogul |
—My Little David, Plagiarism Is Magic |
—David, we've been over this, noone cares about your worthless, backwards, asinine "opinions". |
It's really easy to avoid Vinscamzetti's horseshit analysis program.
Step 1: Update Tor
Step 2: There is no Step 2
VincenzettiSpeak™
David has something to say to you:
Ciao bella gente. Sai, queste società di informazione sono odiare su mia azienda solo perché rendono più facile per i governi oppressivi per perseguitare persone innocenti e più facile per gli artisti pick-up per inseguire le donne casuali. Questa vergine, Phineas Fisher (che tra l'altro non potrà mai fare sesso in vita sua), aveva appena a rovinare tutto. La mia azienda è stata solo facendo un sacco di soldi e Phineas violato la mia azienda e trapelato tutte le mie email a internet. Ma ciò che la gente non sa è che io sono il numero uno al mondo degli hacker. Vendo il più avanzato di hacking toolkit nel mercato nero. Ho tutti l'uomo signore, perché non solo io sono un hacker superstar, io sono anche un ragazzo superstar di karate cintura nera e la ginnastica. Phineas è solo gelatina che ho più figa di lui. Quello che ancora mi sconcerta è che le persone sono così dio-dannati ignorante in questi giorni. Perché non può la gente semplicemente rendersi conto che abbiamo bisogno di passare ad uno stato fascista. Voglio dire, non sei d'accordo con me quando dico che Mussolni era il più grande polician mai creato dal creatore. Non vuoi vivere in una nazione in cui si ottiene gettato in prigione per avere un'opinione diversa dalla media? Una nazione in cui è possibile cagna-schiaffeggiare tua moglie e non ha in galera per la cosiddetta "violenza domestica". Una nazione in cui i servizi pubblici piccoli come "educazione" e "assistenza sanitaria" sono sostituiti con survellience di massa e una polizia segreta. Una nazione dove il governo sa tutto quello che state pensando e se anche solo pensare la cosa sbagliata, ti verrà eseguito. Una nazione dove essere un non-eterosessuale otterrà il culo caramelle gettato nella grande casa. Io sogno di vivere in un paese come questo. Hitler ... err ... voglio dire Mussolni ... err ... voglio dire Dio benedica l'America.
boia chi vende RCS
Where David will most likely be working at when Faggot Team goes out of business:
How to Troll David Vincenzetti
- Inform his potential customers that they can just download Metasploit for free.
- Show his potential customers Fucking Team's ED page.
- Show him his company's ED page.
- Remind him of his weight problems.
- Remind him to drive safely.
- When serving him food, purposely make him wait long for it.
- Tell him that VenomFangX has a higher IQ than he does.
- Tell him that FinFisher was there first and that Galileo RCS is a ripoff of FinSpy.
- Tell him that his cooking sucks.
- Tell him that Italy sucks at soccer and will lose to Germany.
- Tell him that burning one million euro is a better investment than RCS.
- Tell him that he's the retarded offspring of Brett Keane and Michelle Malkin.
- Tell him that he's a charlatan.
- Ask him if he routinely has sex with Simonetta Gallucci and Onision.
- Ask him to help you setup your RCS C&C server.
- Ask him if he still masturbates to Julian Assange.
- Ask him if he still has aspirations of being a gymnastics star / musician.
- Ask him if he's gay.
- Ask him to suck your dick. He might do it for the right price.
In mancanza Galleria Fail del team
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Hacking Team is so sexist that they even have female MGTOW.
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Alessandro Scarafile? Moar Liek Alessandro Pedophile.
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Phineas Fisher giving Hacking Team's twitter a hawt new face lift
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Hacking Team totally doesn't sell to evil countries
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David Vincenzetti's OC Pony
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Go Phineas Fisher Go!
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Phineas Fisher takes the piss out of Hacking Team.
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Yup, Yup
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David Vincenzetti after discovering his awesome ED article.
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Well if you got nothing to hide.
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David Vincenzetti's rape face.
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Hacking Team employs faggots to make their lousy ads.
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Meet Hacking Team's Android developer: Warcorpse666
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David Vincenzetti's illegitimate brother Harry Wormwood
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Meet Eric Rabe's assistant: Ryan Wiley
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Hacking Team's brilliant way of scaring off pirates.
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Jewgle using the "Hacked Team" parody logo.
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The American version of David Vincenzetti.
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David's too stupid to be a troll.
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Yeah, right.
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I don't know where you're getting the idea that Hacking Team are experts in anything.
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Because Hacking Team isn't the #1, they're the #2
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David is the very definition of irony.
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David has the right to hack other people because he's the reincarnation of racist superstar Madison Grant
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Congratulations to Simonetta Gallucci for getting into the front cover of PlayPony.
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Let's hope that Mrs. Vincenzetti doesn't find out about this.
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David Vincenzetti trying to bait 13 year old boys
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David Vincenzetti and Alessandro Scarafile making an advertisement about Galileo RCS.
Hacking Team's D0x
Now David, before you get your panties in a bunch, this d0x is found within YOUR OWN FUCKING WEBSITE so it's all good in the hood.
HT S.r.l. | Via della Moscova 13, 20121 Milano, Italy
Ph. +39 02 29060603 Fax +39 02 63118946
Email: [email protected]
See Also
- HBGary Federal
- Kevin Mitnick
- Brett Keane - David Vinconzetti's American Counterpart
- Jenny McDermott - David Vinwannabeayetti is copying Jenny McDermott.
- AnimatedJames - Hacking Team regular
- Benthelooney - Another Hacking Team regular
- MysteriousMrEnter - Another Hacking Team regular
- Aspergers Syndrome
HT Linkz
- Fucking Team's Shit-Site
- Fucking Team's Email Spool
- Fucking Team's arch nemesis
- Proof David Vincenzetti hates Jews (he doesn't like Bruce Schneier)
- Fucking Team's new double-ended dildo
- Fucking Team's gift to skids worldwide
- David Vincenzetti getting a boner for Camille Paglia
- David hates Obama (because David hates black people)
- Are Fucking Team Staff Cloppers?
- David Vincenzetti doesn't understand irony
- RCS Sekret Sauce
- Hacking Team 400gb Dump /b/ackup
- Dickweed David's LinkedIn /b/ackup
- Chris-chan's botched twin's LinkedIn /b/ackup
- Some dumb bitch, probably an accountant /b/ackup
- Another Hacking Fag's LinkedIn /b/ackup
- Fucking Team's Twitter Account
- Eric Rabe's Twitter Account which he uses to talk to himself
- You too can become a hacktivist!
- EDiots begin busting Fucking Team's chops
Hacking Team is part of a series on Security Faggots |
1337 h4x0rz Captain Crunch • Cult of the Dead Cow • David L. Smith • Gary McKinnon • GOBBLES • HD Moore • Jeff Moss • Kevin Mitnick • Lance M. Havok • Robert Morris • Theo de Raadt • weev • Woz
Try-Hards
2cash • AnonOps • Brian Salcedo • Fearnor • Fry Guy • Gadi Evron • g00ns • Hack This Site • Hacking Team • hann • Joanna Rutkowska • John Field • Joseph Camp • Lizard Squad • LulzSec • Mark Zuckerberg • MarshviperX • Masters of Deception • Michael Lynn • Krashed • Raven • r000t • Ryan • Steve Gibson • th3j35t3r • The Regime • Sabu • Zeekill
Related Shit
Avira • Ciscogate • Cloudflare • Conficker • CyberDefender • Defcon • The Gibson • The Great Em/b/assy Security Leak of 2007 • Heartbleed • I GOT NORTON! • Is Your Son a Computer Hacker? • Operation Sundevil • PIFTS.exe • Social engineering • Stylometry • SubSeven • Zone-H |
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Featured article April 28 & 29, 2016 | ||
Preceded by ShoutYourStatus |
Hacking Team | Succeeded by Trigglypuff |