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Dan Quayle: Difference between revisions
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{{spoiler|DAN QUAYLE CAN'T SPELL POTATO!!!!11}} | |||
[[Image:Quayle.jpg|thumb|[[Power wrist|"We're going back to potatoes to get my dwindling notoriety."]]]] | [[Image:Quayle.jpg|thumb|[[Power wrist|"We're going back to potatoes to get my dwindling notoriety."]]]] | ||
[[Image:Dan_Quayle_is_Evil.jpg|thumb|right|Dan Quayle praises the GODZ of potatoe.]] | [[Image:Dan_Quayle_is_Evil.jpg|thumb|right|Dan Quayle praises the GODZ of potatoe.]] | ||
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I have made good judgements in the Future.|Dan Quayle}} | I have made good judgements in the Future.|Dan Quayle}} | ||
'''James Danforth 'Damien' Quayle III''', the greatest [[fucktard]] to ever run for a political office, beating even [[George Bush|W]] in the ineptitude stakes. Almost all so-called "Bushisms" were actually uttered by Quayle. It's only through the grace of God that Quayle was given no responsibility or power as VP, having been selected simply because he was the only Republican in 1988 who wasn't ugly as sin, which is more than we can say about his wife, [[amirite]]? Yes, he was selected mainly because he was "pretty", according to a horde of elderly, racist, gunloving [[Fag|women with no taste in men]], who the Republicans used to find out which Republican had sex appeal with female voters. | '''James Danforth 'Damien' Quayle III''', the greatest [[fucktard]] to ever run for a political office, beating even [[George Bush|W]] in the ineptitude stakes. | ||
[[GHWB]]'s running-away-mate and Vice President (1988-92), deliberately picked for being a [[retard]] because old man Bush knew first-hand that [[George Herbert Walker Bush#Reagan assassination (1981)|you should never trust your vice president]]. | |||
Almost all so-called "Bushisms" were actually uttered by Quayle. It's only through the grace of God that Quayle was given no responsibility or power as VP, having been selected simply because he was the only Republican in 1988 who wasn't ugly as sin, which is more than we can say about his wife, [[amirite]]? Yes, he was selected mainly because he was "pretty", according to a horde of elderly, racist, gunloving [[Fag|women with no taste in men]], who the Republicans used to find out which Republican had sex appeal with female voters. | |||
Notable for such moments of stupidity such as losing a spelling bee to a fifth grader and selling a shitload of weapons to [[arabs]], who turned out to be Hispanic inner city gang members pretending to be Arabs. He also confused Candace Bergen with her TV character, the 40 year old "I Got Knocked Up By A One Night Stand And I'm Going To Have The Baby!" TV reporter "Murphy Brown", creating much lulz as far as people laughing at his tirades, where he complained about the fictional character as if she was a real life flesh and blood person, who was destroying the fabric of American society by having her bastard without marrying the spawn's father. He was also [[owned]] by [[leftard]] [[Democrat]] Lloyd Bentsen for comparing himself to [[KFC|JFK]]. | Notable for such moments of stupidity such as losing a spelling bee to a fifth grader and selling a shitload of weapons to [[arabs]], who turned out to be Hispanic inner city gang members pretending to be Arabs. He also confused Candace Bergen with her TV character, the 40 year old "I Got Knocked Up By A One Night Stand And I'm Going To Have The Baby!" TV reporter "Murphy Brown", creating much lulz as far as people laughing at his tirades, where he complained about the fictional character as if she was a real life flesh and blood person, who was destroying the fabric of American society by having her bastard without marrying the spawn's father. He was also [[owned]] by [[leftard]] [[Democrat]] Lloyd Bentsen for comparing himself to [[KFC|JFK]]. | ||
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{{quote|May our nation continue to be the beakon of hope to the world.|The Quayle's 1989 Christmas card. (Not a beacon of literacy, though.)}} | {{quote|May our nation continue to be the beakon of hope to the world.|The Quayle's 1989 Christmas card. (Not a beacon of literacy, though.)}} | ||
{{quote|Well, it looks as if the top part fell on the bottom part.|Vice President Dan Quayle referring to the collapsed section of the 880 freeway after the San Francisco earthquake of 1989. | {{quote|Well, [[Captain Obvious|it looks as if the top part fell on the bottom part]].|Vice President Dan Quayle referring to the collapsed section of the 880 freeway after the San Francisco earthquake of 1989.}} | ||
{{quote|Getting [cruise missiles] more accurate so that we can have precise precision.|Vice President Dan Quayle referring to his legislative work dealing with cruise missiles}} | {{quote|Getting [cruise missiles] more accurate so that we can have precise precision.|Vice President Dan Quayle referring to his legislative work dealing with cruise missiles}} | ||
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== See also == | == See also == | ||
* [[Sarah Palin]] - Dan Quayle with tits | * [[Sarah Palin]] - Dan Quayle with tits | ||
* [[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez]] [[Rule 63]] left wing counterpart | |||
==Links== | ==Links== |
Latest revision as of 07:00, 11 December 2018
—Dan Quayle |
James Danforth 'Damien' Quayle III, the greatest fucktard to ever run for a political office, beating even W in the ineptitude stakes.
GHWB's running-away-mate and Vice President (1988-92), deliberately picked for being a retard because old man Bush knew first-hand that you should never trust your vice president.
Almost all so-called "Bushisms" were actually uttered by Quayle. It's only through the grace of God that Quayle was given no responsibility or power as VP, having been selected simply because he was the only Republican in 1988 who wasn't ugly as sin, which is more than we can say about his wife, amirite? Yes, he was selected mainly because he was "pretty", according to a horde of elderly, racist, gunloving women with no taste in men, who the Republicans used to find out which Republican had sex appeal with female voters.
Notable for such moments of stupidity such as losing a spelling bee to a fifth grader and selling a shitload of weapons to arabs, who turned out to be Hispanic inner city gang members pretending to be Arabs. He also confused Candace Bergen with her TV character, the 40 year old "I Got Knocked Up By A One Night Stand And I'm Going To Have The Baby!" TV reporter "Murphy Brown", creating much lulz as far as people laughing at his tirades, where he complained about the fictional character as if she was a real life flesh and blood person, who was destroying the fabric of American society by having her bastard without marrying the spawn's father. He was also owned by leftard Democrat Lloyd Bentsen for comparing himself to JFK.
Perhaps the first politician to ever lose a political career over a spelling mistake. Dan Quayle is, was and always will be made of fail, yet still manages to have more appeal than Dick Cheney.
Quaylisms
—Vice President Dan Quayle on comparing the offensive capabilities of the Warsaw Pact with the defensive system of NATO |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle winning friends while speaking to the United Negro College Fund |
—Vice President Dan Quayle, to the American Samoans, whose capital Quayle pronounces "Pogo Pogo" |
—Vice President Dan Quayle (The New Yorker, October 10, 1988, p.102) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle, to the Phoenix Republican Forum, March 1990 |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle on being asked to define the term "target prices." Quayle's press secretary then cut short the press conference, after two minutes and 30 seconds. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle Referring to Latin America. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle; Actually, Dubcek was the leader of the Prague Spring. |
—The Quayle's 1989 Christmas card. (Not a beacon of literacy, though.) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle referring to the collapsed section of the 880 freeway after the San Francisco earthquake of 1989. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle referring to his legislative work dealing with cruise missiles |
—Vice President Dan Quayle addressing workers at an Ohio steel plant,1988 |
—Vice President Dan Quayle during the Bentsen debate |
—Vice President Dan Quayle when asked what he would do if he assumed the Presidency (1988) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle responding to press reports his aides having to, in effect, "potty train" him. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
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—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle confusing the sexual assaulter/congressman with Astronaut Buzz Aldrin. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle after having been presented with an empty box that was to contain a gift from a sailing team in South America. He was told that the gift was not ready yet, but that it would be presented to him when they arrived in the United States. |
During the White House Easter Egg Roll of 1991, Quayle signed autographs using only his finger. He had prepared pre-signed cards which his aides handed out while he made signing gestures. This allowed him to move briskly and efficiently through the crowd, said his spokesman.
Dan Quayle, in April 1991, was concerned that his advisers may be getting out of touch with "Real Americans." In order to combat this, he suggested that they read People magazine.
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle standing in front of the collapsed section of highway caused by the Loma Preta quake. (CNN) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle after the San Francisco earthquake |
—Vice President Dan Quayle, stepping out of the helicopter upon arrival at Alameda Naval Air Station. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle at a garden center and produce store in Baltimore (from the Los Angeles Times, Douglas Jehl, November 6, 1988) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle remarks to oil spill clean-up workers at Prince William Sound, May, 1989 |
—Vice President Dan Quayle remarks to oil spill clean-up workers at Prince William Sound, May, 1989 |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Marilyn Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle, when purchasing a South African Indian Doll that, when lifted, displays an erection. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle defending himself (LA Herald Examiner 10/3/88) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle to reporters in 10/88 |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle (Newsweek 4/9/90) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle during the VP debate in Omaha, Nebraska (10/88) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle (LA Times 5/21/89) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle in eastern Illinois (LA Times 10/19/88) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle to a crowd in Eau Claire, Wisc. (LA Times 10/16/88) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle attempting to say the SF earthquake wreckage was heart-rending (Newsweek 10/30/89) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle defending himself (Tampa Tribune-Times 1/7/90) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle shortly after being named Geo. Bush's running mate (8/28/88 the NY Times) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle responding to reporter's questions about his use of Air force 2 to go on golf trips at the cost of $26,000/hour |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle, in a speech to the Christian Coalition |
—Vice President Dan Quayle encouraging the Milwaukee Brewers after throwing out the opening pitch of the season. (5/3/92 Sunday Detroit News) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle asking doctors at a Manhattan AIDS clinic about their treatments of choice, referring to the drug AZT. (NY Post, early May 92) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
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—Vice President Dan Quayle in October 91 |
—Vice President Dan Quayle in October 91 addressing announced 74,000 layoffs |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle in a handwritten note written to Sam Snead in the summer of 1991, after they had played a round of golf. (Herald-Times, Bloomington, IN, July 15, 1992) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle giving an intelligent, in-depth analysis of the LA riots. (Herb Caen, SF Chronicle) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle addressing the Commonwealth Club of San Francisco and criticizing Murphy Brown's decision to NOT have an abortion and to be a single (highly successful) mother. When told about Quayle's comments, a senior Bush campaign official replied only "Oh, dear." Bush's top aid said, "The world is a lot more complex than Dan would like to believe" |
—Vice President Dan Quayle to The Chron's Jerry Roberts. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle defending his opinions about the TV show "Murphy Brown" [Las Vegas RJ 21 May 92] |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle talking about breast cancer |
—Vice President Dan Quayle trying to convince reporters that the economy was doing better because a Burger King had a "now hiring" sign in the window. He was campaigning for reelection in Ontario, CA in January 1992. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle after the manager of the Burger King had said that the jobs offered were part-time minimum wage jobs, which didn't pay enough to live on, and that "It's hard to find people who want to actually show up for the job." |
—Vice President Dan Quayle, 11/13/91 (CNN) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle explaining why he had just purchased four peaches (and no citrus fruits -- for which Florida is famous) at a Publix supermarket in Oakland Park, Florida. Georgia (which IS famous for peaches) did not gain from the transaction, however; the peaches were from Chile. (The Sun Sentinal) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Senator Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle during a photo-op in LA, responding to criticisms that he didn't understand what it meant to live in the "inner city." (WRAL 6/23/92) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle explaining that Dilatation and Curettage, a form of abortion which occurs after fertilization, is not really abortion. (the Washington post, 11/03/88) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle correcting a student's correct spelling of the word "potatoe" during a spelling bee at an elementary school in Trenton. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle, actually quoting from President Andrew Jackson. |
—Vice President Dan Quayle while at a Las Vegas bowling alley. the Vice-President bowled 5 times, and knocked down 19 pins. (6/25/92, San Jose Mercury News) The American Bowling Congress projected his score for a full game to be 76. The Detroit average for amateur players is 163 (USA Today, 7/6/92) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle giving his opinion about Ross Perot's presidential campaign (June 1992) |
Dan Quayle had a trip planned to Beijing, but was worried because of the turmoil at that end. His security adviser however informed him that Xit was pretty safe for D.Q. as, "They are only harassing intellectuals."
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle at a campaign stop in California and and then at CA State University, Fresno (The Quayle Quarterly, Spring/Summer 1992) |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle responding to Larry King's question of how he would react if his 13-year-old daughter chose to have an abortion. (CNN, July 22, 1992) Marilyn Quayle later remarked that her daughter would "take the child to term." |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
—Vice President Dan Quayle |
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—Vice President Dan Quayle |
See also
- Sarah Palin - Dan Quayle with tits
- Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Rule 63 left wing counterpart