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[[Image:Bushumbrella1.jpg|thumb|right|<s>[[George W Bush|W]], the President of [[United States|America]], | [[File:History of US presidents.jpg|thumb|Who needs history class, this is all [[you]] need to know]] | ||
[[Image:Bushumbrella1.jpg|thumb|right|<s>[[George W Bush|W]], the President of [[United States|America]], was the [[Insane|smartest]] president. [[evar]].</s> [[Senator_Barack_Hussein_Obama|OBAMA]] is the [[Boring|smartest]] president [[evar]].]] | |||
[[Image:Robotnixon.gif|thumb|The 1970's were an interesting time to be alive.]] | [[Image:Robotnixon.gif|thumb|The 1970's were an interesting time to be alive.]] | ||
[[Image:William howard taft moustache rides.jpg|right|thumb|Taft is mostly remembered for being fat and having awesome facial hair.]] | [[Image:William howard taft moustache rides.jpg|right|thumb|Taft is mostly remembered for being fat and having awesome facial hair.]] | ||
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[[File:Headshotod5.jpg|thumb|In lead we trust.]] | [[File:Headshotod5.jpg|thumb|In lead we trust.]] | ||
A '''President''' is anyone who is in charge of lots of [[America|shit]]. You can usually tell if you're a president or not based on how many people kiss your ass and how | A '''President''' is anyone who is in charge of lots of [[America|shit]]. You can usually tell if you're a president or not based on how many people kiss your ass and how big your armed escort is. Many countries, such as El Salvador and [[Texas]], use the presidential system instead of having a [[queen]] or a [[Capitalism|dictator]]. | ||
==The Election Process== | ==The Election Process== | ||
In a [[democracy]] or a [[republic]], the President is chosen by the [[people]] (except in [[Israel]] and the [[United States]], where | In a [[democracy]] or a [[republic]], the President is chosen by the [[people]] (except in [[Israel]] and the [[United States]], where fucking everything is chosen by [[Jews]]). A specific day is picked and [[noone|everyone]] skips out on work to go vote, thus fulfilling their [[anal sex|civic duty]]. Later on that week the election is contested by the [[Pig bottom|loser]] and then the opponents engage in a fight to the [[death]]. | ||
The survivor of the duel then calls his old college/drinking buddies up and invites them to help him run the country into the ground. | The survivor of the duel then calls his old college/drinking buddies up and invites them to help him run the country into the ground. | ||
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==Examples of Presidents== | ==Examples of Presidents== | ||
* | * [[Al Gore|Albert A. Gore]] is <s>president</s> king of the [[Internets]] and future Emperor of the Moon. | ||
* | * [[Girlvinyl]] is Queen of <s>'''æ'''</s> Treachery, Deceit, and Anal Warts. | ||
* [[Hepkitten]] is president of [[LiveJournal]]. | * [[Hepkitten]] is president of [[LiveJournal]]. | ||
* [[ | * [[Oprah Winfrey|Oprah]] is <s>president</s> empress of black person. | ||
* [[Adolf Hitler]] | * [[Adolf Hitler]] was Reichspräsident and Führer of [[Germany]]. | ||
* [[Mikhail Saakashvili|Mikhail N. Saakashvili]] | * [[Mikhail Saakashvili|Mikhail N. Saakashvili]] was president of [[Messin' With Sasquatch|Georgia]]. | ||
* [[Saddam Hussein]] was president of [[Iraq]]. | * [[Saddam Hussein]] was president of [[Iraq]]. | ||
* [[Mahmoud Ahmadinejad]] | * [[Mahmoud Ahmadinejad]] was president of [[Iran]]. | ||
* [[Bad Vlad|Vladimir V. Putin]] is | * [[Bad Vlad|Vladimir V. Putin]] is eternal president of [[Russia]]. | ||
* [[George Washington]] | * [[George Washington]] was the [[Propaganda|first president of the United States]]. | ||
* [[Warren G. Harding]] was the first [[negro]] president of the United States and is currently president of [[Wikipedia]] [[vandal]]ism. | * [[Warren G. Harding]] was the first [[negro]] president of the United States and is currently president of [[Wikipedia]] [[vandal]]ism. | ||
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* [[Lyndon Johnson|Lyndon B. Johnson]] | * [[Lyndon Johnson|Lyndon B. Johnson]] | ||
* [[Ronald Reagan|Ronald W. Reagan]] was president of [[ | * [[Ronald Reagan|Ronald W. Reagan]] was president of [[lemonparty|senility]]. | ||
* [[Bill Clinton|William J. Clinton]] | * [[Bill Clinton|William J. Clinton]] remains president of [[hookers and blow]]. | ||
* [[W|George W. Bush]] was the president of [[ | * [[W|George W. Bush]] was the president of [[Derp|being himself]]. | ||
* [[Senator Barack Hussein Obama|Barack H. Obama]] is president of [[ | * [[Senator Barack Hussein Obama|Barack H. Obama]] is president of [[Your mom|chikinz]]. | ||
* [[Hugo Chavez|Hugo R. Chávez]] | * [[Drumpf|Donald J. Trump]] is president of [[Dumbfuckistan]]. | ||
* [[Hugo Chavez|Hugo R. Chávez]] was president of [[Venezuela]] and an [[IRL]] [[troll]]. Good night, sweet Prince. | |||
==Examples of things that are ''not'' Presidents== | ==Examples of things that are ''not'' Presidents== | ||
* [[Hillary Clinton]] | |||
* [[Benazir Bhutto]] | * [[Benazir Bhutto]] | ||
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* [[John McCain]] | * [[John McCain]] | ||
* [[ | * [[Kamala Harris (prostitute)|Kamala Harris]] | ||
*[[Vermin Supreme]]... yet. | *[[Vermin Supreme]]... yet. | ||
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* [[Hugh Jidette]] Running for 2012, vote for him and receive a free pony, and pie! | * [[Hugh Jidette]] Running for 2012, vote for him and receive a free pony, and pie! | ||
* [[John McCain]] | * <s>[[John McCain]]</s> not eligible because he's dead | ||
* [[Cynthia McKinney]] | * [[Cynthia McKinney]] | ||
* [[Ralph Nader]] | * [[Ralph Nader]] | ||
* [[Sarah Palin]] | * [[Sarah Palin]] | ||
* <s>[[Hillary Clinton]] | * <s>[[Hillary Clinton]]</s> | ||
* [[Howard Dean]] | * [[Howard Dean]] | ||
* [[John Edwards]] | * [[John Edwards]] | ||
* [[Bernie Sanders]] | |||
* [[Rudy Ghouliani]] | * [[Rudy Ghouliani]] | ||
* [[Mike Gravel]] | * <s>[[Mike Gravel]]</s> not eligible because he's dead | ||
* [[Mike Huckabee]] | * [[Mike Huckabee]] | ||
* [[India|Nikki Haley]] | |||
* [[Florida|Ron DeSantis]] | |||
* [[Jesse Jackson]] | * [[Jesse Jackson]] | ||
* [[Dennis Kucinich]] | * [[Dennis Kucinich]] | ||
* [[Lyndon Larouche]] | * [[Lyndon Larouche]] | ||
* [[San Francisco|Gavin Newsom]] | |||
* [[Joe Lieberman]] | * [[Joe Lieberman]] | ||
* [[Ron Paul]] | * [[Ron Paul]] | ||
* [[Mitt Romney]] | * [[Mitt Romney]] | ||
* [[Al Sharpton]] | * [[Al Sharpton]] | ||
* [[Freddie Thompson]] | * [[Freddie Thompson]] | ||
* [[Arnold Schwarzenegger]] not eligible, | * [[Arnold Schwarzenegger]] not eligible, [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arnold_Schwarzenegger#Infidelity thanks to his penis.] | ||
==See also== | ==See also== | ||
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{{Politics}} | {{Politics}} | ||
[[Category: Epithets]] | [[Category: Epithets]] | ||
{{Trump}} | |||
Latest revision as of 01:29, 23 November 2024
A President is anyone who is in charge of lots of shit. You can usually tell if you're a president or not based on how many people kiss your ass and how big your armed escort is. Many countries, such as El Salvador and Texas, use the presidential system instead of having a queen or a dictator.
The Election Process
In a democracy or a republic, the President is chosen by the people (except in Israel and the United States, where fucking everything is chosen by Jews). A specific day is picked and everyone skips out on work to go vote, thus fulfilling their civic duty. Later on that week the election is contested by the loser and then the opponents engage in a fight to the death.
The survivor of the duel then calls his old college/drinking buddies up and invites them to help him run the country into the ground.
Presidential Powers
When you're a president, you're allowed to do whatever you want. This includes blowing shit up, kicking puppies, eating gourmet meals, and forcing your will upon the world. Some presidents have chosen to do this on their own, but others have claimed to do it in the name of God.
Examples of Presidents
- Albert A. Gore is
presidentking of the Internets and future Emperor of the Moon.
- Girlvinyl is Queen of
æTreachery, Deceit, and Anal Warts.
- Hepkitten is president of LiveJournal.
- Oprah is
presidentempress of black person.
- Adolf Hitler was Reichspräsident and Führer of Germany.
- Mikhail N. Saakashvili was president of Georgia.
- Saddam Hussein was president of Iraq.
- Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was president of Iran.
- Vladimir V. Putin is eternal president of Russia.
- Warren G. Harding was the first negro president of the United States and is currently president of Wikipedia vandalism.
- John F. Kennedy is president of mythology, conspiracy and cheating on ur wife.
- Ronald W. Reagan was president of senility.
- William J. Clinton remains president of hookers and blow.
- George W. Bush was the president of being himself.
- Barack H. Obama is president of chikinz.
- Donald J. Trump is president of Dumbfuckistan.
- Hugo R. Chávez was president of Venezuela and an IRL troll. Good night, sweet Prince.
Examples of things that are not Presidents
- Vermin Supreme... yet.
Examples of things that want to be President of the U.S.A.
- Hugh Jidette Running for 2012, vote for him and receive a free pony, and pie!
John McCainnot eligible because he's dead- Cynthia McKinney
- Ralph Nader
- Sarah Palin
Hillary Clinton- Howard Dean
- John Edwards
- Bernie Sanders
- Rudy Ghouliani
Mike Gravelnot eligible because he's dead- Mike Huckabee
- Nikki Haley
- Ron DeSantis
- Jesse Jackson
- Dennis Kucinich
- Lyndon Larouche
- Gavin Newsom
- Joe Lieberman
- Ron Paul
- Mitt Romney
- Al Sharpton
- Freddie Thompson
- Arnold Schwarzenegger not eligible, thanks to his penis.
See also
 |
President is part of a series on Donald Trump. You're gonna love this article, believe me. |
 |