Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Cookies: Difference between revisions

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search
← Older edit
imported>FuckYourShit
→‎Dexter's Lab: Fixed a spelling error, replaced "meadows" with "minnows" in the gallery section.
m Reverted edit by Edgar181's sock puppet 6 (talk) to last revision by [[User:imported>Killerratte|imported>Killerratte]]
Tag: Rollback
 
(26 intermediate revisions by 4 users not shown)
Line 1: Line 1:
 
[[File:Oreo nigra.png|right]]
'''Cookies''' are sweet, delicious treats. Although not as [[Portal|beloved]] as [[cake]]s, the main advantage of cookies is that there can be five in a package. Cookies are baked with sugar, [[flower]], and [[The Matrix|love]] ([[^__^]]). Cookies are the most sought-after objects of the [[Internets]]. Whenever cookies are mentioned, one can expect the Cookie Monster, [[Arnold Schwarzenegger]], or even Dexter to make an appearance.
'''Cookies''' are sweet, delicious treats. Although not as [[Portal|beloved]] as [[cake]]s, the main advantage of cookies is that there can be five in a package. Cookies are baked with sugar, [[flower]], and [[The Matrix|love]] ([[^__^]]). Cookies are the most sought-after objects of the [[Internets]]. Whenever cookies are mentioned, one can expect the Cookie Monster, [[Arnold Schwarzenegger]], or even Dexter to make an appearance.


Line 42: Line 42:
In response, the Sesame Street executives forced Cookie Monster to cut down on cookies. Cookies became a "sometimes food"; now, he eats [[fruit]]s first. Sesame [[fanbois]] then attacked the Sesame Street executives for turning him into a so-called '''Veggie Monster'''. Cookie Monster denies these claims and claims that he would eat (almost) anything.
In response, the Sesame Street executives forced Cookie Monster to cut down on cookies. Cookies became a "sometimes food"; now, he eats [[fruit]]s first. Sesame [[fanbois]] then attacked the Sesame Street executives for turning him into a so-called '''Veggie Monster'''. Cookie Monster denies these claims and claims that he would eat (almost) anything.


<center>
{{cg|Cookie Monster|OMNOMNOMNOMNOM|center|<gallery perrow="5">
<gallery caption="Cookie Monster">
File:Cookie Monster cookie dough.gif
File:Waiting Cookie Monster.gif
File:I Want Cookies.jpg|Cookies are an all-the-time food.
File:Cookies_-_Cookie_Monster_-_A_Is_For_Addict.gif|A is for Addict.
File:Cookies_-_Cookie_Monster_-_Closet.gif
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Cookie Monster elves.jpg
File:Lulz basic.JPG|[[Oh exploitable!]]
File:Lulz basic.JPG|[[Oh exploitable!]]
File:CookieMonsterWTC.jpg|Cookies can led to pretty nasty habits.
File:CookieMonsterWTC.jpg|Cookies can led to pretty nasty habits.
File:Penispenispenis.jpg|Cookie Monster is a poor role-model.
File:Penispenispenis.jpg|Cookie Monster is a poor role-model.
File:CookieCutter.gif|Cookies can led to distress and heartache.
File:CookieCutter.gif|Cookies can led to distress and heartache.
File:Def cm.JPG|Cookie Monster in [[Simple English|pain English]].
File:CookieMonsterDelete.png|Delete Cookie!?
File:CookieMonsterDelete.png|Delete Cookie!?
File:Cookieexploitable.jpg|[[Oh exploitable!]]
File:Cookieexploitable.jpg|[[Oh exploitable!]]
File:Def cm.JPG|Cookie Monster in [[Simple English|pain English]].
File:Cookies_-_Cookie_Monster_-_Cosplay.jpg|What happens to Cookie Monsters who stop eating cookies!
File:I Want Cookies.jpg|Cookies are an all-the-time food.
File:Cookie Monster wrestler.jpg
File:Cookies_-_Cookie_Monster_-_Don't_Always.jpg
File:Cookies_-_Cookie_Monster_-_Under_Your_Bed.jpg
File:Cookies_-_Cookie_Monster_-_Ashamed.jpg
File:Cookies_-_Cookie_Monster_-_Nailed_It.jpg
File:Cookemonster.gif
</gallery>
</gallery>
</center>
|}}


===Arnold Schwarzenegger===
===Arnold Schwarzenegger===
Line 92: Line 104:
'''Dexter's Lab''' was a comedic [[cartoon]] created and produced by [[Russian]] [[Jew]] Genndy Tartakovsky and shown on Cartoon Network. This show featured a [[indigo child|boy genius]] called Dexter and his childish sister Dee-Dee. In a particular episode called "The Parrot Trap", Dexter creates a parrot that mimics anything it hears. Due to interference from Dee-Dee, the parrot annoys Dexter, and Dexter bashes it up. This leads to the parrot going haywire and saying things such as "DEXTER'S A COOKIE", "DEXTER'S A STUPID GIRL", "SMOOTH MOVE DEXTER", "DEXTER'S SECRET", "THE FLORIDA EVERGLADES", and "WORMS AND PLASTIC MINNOWS". This is often parodied and remixed in [[YouTube]] videos.
'''Dexter's Lab''' was a comedic [[cartoon]] created and produced by [[Russian]] [[Jew]] Genndy Tartakovsky and shown on Cartoon Network. This show featured a [[indigo child|boy genius]] called Dexter and his childish sister Dee-Dee. In a particular episode called "The Parrot Trap", Dexter creates a parrot that mimics anything it hears. Due to interference from Dee-Dee, the parrot annoys Dexter, and Dexter bashes it up. This leads to the parrot going haywire and saying things such as "DEXTER'S A COOKIE", "DEXTER'S A STUPID GIRL", "SMOOTH MOVE DEXTER", "DEXTER'S SECRET", "THE FLORIDA EVERGLADES", and "WORMS AND PLASTIC MINNOWS". This is often parodied and remixed in [[YouTube]] videos.


<center>
<center><gallery caption="The Parrot Trap">
<gallery caption="The Parrot Trap">
File:DexterParrot.png|Worms and plastic minnows.
File:DexterParrot.png|Worms and plastic minnows.
File:DexterCookie.png|Don't deny what's inside.
File:DexterParrot.gif|Dexter is known for cases of animal cruelty.
File:DexterParrot.gif|Dexter is known for cases of animal cruelty.
</gallery>
</gallery></center>
</center>


==Gallery==
==Gallery==
<center>
{{collapsegallery||Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
<gallery caption="Cookies">
File:Cookie tray's use.jpg
File:Cookies_-_Thong_Cookies.jpg
File:Cookie sex.jpg
File:Gingerbread porn.jpg
File:Cookie and Doughnut.PNG
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Cookies in car.jpg
File:Fancy dessert.jpg
File:Cookies_-_Skulls.jpg
File:Oreo better half.jpg
File:No Oreos.jpg
File:G Scouts.jpg|Remember this next time.
File:Firefox - Astolpho Comic.jpg
File:Bunny-cookie.jpg|So [[Kawaii]] [[^__^]].
File:Bunny-cookie.jpg|So [[Kawaii]] [[^__^]].
File:Liecookie.png|The [[Portal|cookie is a lie]]?
File:Liecookie.png|The [[Portal|cookie is a lie]]?
Line 112: Line 133:
File:Zalgo cookies.jpg|[[Zalgo]]
File:Zalgo cookies.jpg|[[Zalgo]]
File:Frank Zappa milk and cookies.jpg|Frank Zappa.
File:Frank Zappa milk and cookies.jpg|Frank Zappa.
File:G Scouts.jpg|Remember this next time.
File:Seinfeld cookie.jpg|The cookie is wise.
Image:Seinfeld cookie.jpg|The cookie is wise.
File:Swasticookies.jpg
</gallery>
File:Cookies_-_Science.jpg|<center>SCIENCE!</center>
</center>
File:Cookies_-_Oreo_-_Triple_Doubles.jpg|Because your ass isn't [[fat]] enough already.
File:Cookies_-_Oreo_-_Fun_Stix.jpg|Cookie straws, aka [[dildos|"fun stixs"]]
File:Cookies_-_Oreo_-_White_Fudge.jpg|[[Black]] on the inside, [[white]] on the outside.
File:Spiders_-_Oreo.jpg|And now you'll never eat another Oreo again.
File:Cookies_-_Samoa_Cookie.jpg|Samoas, the penultimate cookie form.
File:Cookies_-_F-Cup_Cookies.jpg|From [[Japan|Jap Land]], claims to increase the size of womenz breasteses.
File:Cookies_-_Gingerbread_Guts.jpg|Somebody had ~way~ too much time on their hands.
File:Cookies_-_Girl_Scout_Cookie_Sales.jpg|Doesn't take into account that they run out of Thin Mints and Samoas after the third day of sales, forcing you to settle for third rate alternatives.
File:Cookies_-_Glazed.jpg|Now with [[cum|glaze]]!
File:Cookies_-_Gingerboard.jpg
File:Cookies_-_Dirty_Cookies.jpg
File:Cookies_-_Fortune_Help.jpg
File:Cookies_-_Weight_Watchers_Hypocrisy.jpg
File:POTN_EDF2_MIND_YOUR_OWN_BUSINESS.jpg
</gallery>}}


==See also==
==See also==

Latest revision as of 13:18, 20 August 2024

Cookies are sweet, delicious treats. Although not as beloved as cakes, the main advantage of cookies is that there can be five in a package. Cookies are baked with sugar, flower, and love (^__^). Cookies are the most sought-after objects of the Internets. Whenever cookies are mentioned, one can expect the Cookie Monster, Arnold Schwarzenegger, or even Dexter to make an appearance.

Varieties

Browser cookies

Not all cookies have to be neat, tasty treats; they can be tiny, weightless bits of data as well. HTTP cookies, or browser cookies, are tracking bugs that infest your computer's browser and cache. Websites may use them to see if you visit their site or track unique visits. Websites may also use cookies for authentication, tracking your session, or keeping you logged in to a site for weeks.

Most sites need cookies to be enabled in order to function, especially if you're planning to log in. Unfortunately, most users manage their cookies or their cache. These people, for one reason or another, don't know how to enable or disable cookies. These people never touch their browser's Preferences or Options unless they're planning to do something wrong. They don't even know how to clear their cache or browsing history.

Although cookies could be used to spy and annoy you, cookies are not that harmful. Despite this, people disable cookies anyway and forget how to re-enable them. Cookies aren't viruses. They can destroy your privacy, but they can't destroy software or your computer. Simply keep them enabled and start clearing your cache every once in a while.

  • Browser Cookies
  • Would they know?
    Would they know?
  • You better learn how to clear them.
    You better learn how to clear them.
  • The Internet is the world's largest cookie exporter.
    The Internet is the world's largest cookie exporter.

Fortune cookies

Fortune cookies are mystic treats that supposedly contain answers to your future. These fortunes are less cryptic than those created by Nostradamus, but they're also less likely to ever happen. They were created by Asian Americans in order to profit from ramen-eating weeaboos who seek "authentic" Asian cuisine. Fortune cookies also tend to contain the supposed winning numbers to the lottery. Recently, however, fortune cookies began to stop offering fortune and to provide advice and ancient Chinese proverbs instead.

Protip: Point out to weeaboos that fortune cookies were invented in Texas.

  • Fortune Cookies
  • Did you really need a cookie to tell you this?
    Did you really need a cookie to tell you this?
  • You've been had.
    You've been had.
  • Sometimes, they give out good advice.
    Sometimes, they give out good advice.

Cookie lovers

Cookie Monster

   
“ 		 
"C" is for "cookie"; that's good enough for me.
  		„
  		 

—Cookie Monster

   
“ 		 
Cookies are a sometimes food.
  		„
  		 

—Cookie Monster in denial

Cookie Monster has generally been viewed as a lovable, huggable creature. Cookie Monster is so named due to his fierce and beastly love for cookies and all things sweet. He's been on Sesame Street since Day 1, and for most of that time, there wasn't any complaining. Cookie Monster introduced several generations to humor and created the "C" is for Cookie song.

Recently, however, things changed. Over 60% of Americans were fat and sloppy. Concerned, Christian mothers began to look for a scapegoat. Someone or something had to be responsible, but it couldn't be themselves. It had to been some evil, foreign influence. It had to be from TV or video games; it couldn't be from enablers such as themselves. These parents blamed Cookie Monster and flooded Sesames Street's human resources department with complaints.

In response, the Sesame Street executives forced Cookie Monster to cut down on cookies. Cookies became a "sometimes food"; now, he eats fruits first. Sesame fanbois then attacked the Sesame Street executives for turning him into a so-called Veggie Monster. Cookie Monster denies these claims and claims that he would eat (almost) anything.

Cookie Monster About missing Pics
  • Cookies are an all-the-time food.
    Cookies are an all-the-time food.
  • A is for Addict.
    A is for Addict.
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]
  • Oh exploitable!
    Oh exploitable!
  • Cookies can led to pretty nasty habits.
    Cookies can led to pretty nasty habits.
  • Cookie Monster is a poor role-model.
    Cookie Monster is a poor role-model.
  • Cookies can led to distress and heartache.
    Cookies can led to distress and heartache.
  • Cookie Monster in pain English.
    Cookie Monster in pain English.
  • Delete Cookie!?
    Delete Cookie!?
  • Oh exploitable!
    Oh exploitable!
  • What happens to Cookie Monsters who stop eating cookies!
    What happens to Cookie Monsters who stop eating cookies!

Arnold Schwarzenegger

Moar info: Arnold Schwarzenegger.

   
“ 		 
Put that cookie down! Nao!
  		„
  		 

—Arnold Schwarzenegger

After doing memorable movies such as Predator and Terminator, Arnold decided to change his image by doing family comedies and Japanese commercials. This led to box office bombs and Internet wins such as Kindergarten Cop and Jingle All the Way.

During the film, Arnold (portraying a loser named "Howard" phones home in order to talk to his wife, but an asshole called "Ted" answers instead. Ted eats some cookies baked by Arnold's waifu and tells Arnold about how good they are. Arnold then yells:

Cookies? Who told you you could eat my cookies? Put that cookie down. NOW!

This was all before the Internets of course, but once the users rediscovered the film, parodies appeared everywhere (specifically YouTube).

InvaderMar

Moar info: InvaderMar.

   
“ 		 
OMG IT TASTES SO GOOD HOW DOES A COOKIE TASTE LIKE SOMEONE'S ORGASM???
  		„
  		 

—InvaderMar, (sauce)

InvaderMar is a DeviantArtist who really, really loves cookies. In fact, cookies are often featured in her artwork. Her obsession with cookies appears to be influenced in part by cookies' awesome sweet taste.

  • InvaderMar
  • I can still taste it on his lips...
    I can still taste it on his lips...
  • What has cookies done!?
    What has cookies done!?
  • She loves cookies.
    She loves cookies.
  • Cookies can prove to be a distraction in a relationship.
    Cookies can prove to be a distraction in a relationship.
  • You know you want me.
    You know you want me.
  • New Years Resolutions.
    New Years Resolutions.
  • Feels so good.
    Feels so good.

Cookie haters

Dexter's Lab

   
“ 		 
Dexter's a cookie.
  		„
  		 

—Robo-parrot

Dexter's Lab was a comedic cartoon created and produced by Russian Jew Genndy Tartakovsky and shown on Cartoon Network. This show featured a boy genius called Dexter and his childish sister Dee-Dee. In a particular episode called "The Parrot Trap", Dexter creates a parrot that mimics anything it hears. Due to interference from Dee-Dee, the parrot annoys Dexter, and Dexter bashes it up. This leads to the parrot going haywire and saying things such as "DEXTER'S A COOKIE", "DEXTER'S A STUPID GIRL", "SMOOTH MOVE DEXTER", "DEXTER'S SECRET", "THE FLORIDA EVERGLADES", and "WORMS AND PLASTIC MINNOWS". This is often parodied and remixed in YouTube videos.

  • The Parrot Trap
  • Worms and plastic minnows.
    Worms and plastic minnows.
  • Dexter is known for cases of animal cruelty.
    Dexter is known for cases of animal cruelty.

Gallery

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

See also

 Cookies
is part of a series on
Food and Drink

[BleurghOm Nom Nom]
Retrieved from "http://edramatica.com/index.php?title=Cookies&oldid=1885898"