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Keegan Salisbury: Difference between revisions

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{{Achtung|'''HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!!!! THIS ASPIE GREW UP TO ABUSE HIS GIRLFRIEND!!!!'''}}
{{eduser|LolcowWithAnEDAccount}}
{{SickFuck}}
{{Watched}}
{{pedo}}
{{lolcow}}
{{aspie}}
{{aspie}}
{{Failsathero}}
{{milkedcow}}
{{rainbow|YOU WILL GET PERMABANNED!}}
{{Redeemed}}
{{ib|[[File:KeeganIRL.jpg|300px]]}}
{{Ibhead|Keegan Salisbury}}
{{Ibrow|'''Born'''|<small>September 15, 2004</small>}}
{{Ibrow|'''Nationality'''|<small>[[Americunt]]&nbsp;&nbsp;[[File:MiniflagUSA.png]]</small>}}
{{Ibrow|'''Residence'''|<small>[[Illinois]]</small>}}
{{Ibrow|'''Ethnicity'''|<small>[[White devil]]</small>}}
{{Ibrow|'''Gender'''|<small>[[Genderfluid]]</small>}}
{{Ibrow|'''Sexuality'''|<small>Abrosexual [[Pervert]]</small>}}
{{Ibrow|'''Aliases'''|<small>MultiKeegster1, MultiKeegster2, KJS12, TheYtpmaker1000, YTPMaker1000, SourWashingMachine, Imageny, Empty Recycle Bin, xomdjl_, >nul, Keegs, Keegan The YTP Maker, Ksalisb04, godgeeK, Lord Keith, DontThinkAboutIt112, Keegdog, ksal_, ksal., Keegan J.S., Crystal Lake Entrepreneur, Crystal Lake Video Maker, K33G4N, Zeus, z3us, Keegman, ~ Maestro Keegan ~, etc.</small>}}
{{Ibrow|'''Occupation'''|<small>Tard raging at people he hates, fapping to random girls and waifus, and possibly more</small>}}
{{Ibend}}
'''[[Powerword|Keegan James Salisbury]]''' is a severely autistic {{age|2004|9|15}}-year-old Internet celebrity turned [[manchild]] from Crystal Lake, [[Illinois]] with [[Special Snowflake Syndrome]] who usually does nothing but sit on his computer and make both [[YTP]]s and [[YTPMV]]s, threaten people he doesn't like to do dangerous internet acts, cyberstalk people, overreact to the slightest provocations and have [[RAGE|autistic meltdowns]].
 
Somehow, he managed to somewhat blend in with his half-assed vigilante campaigns and DDoSing [[Lulz|(despite getting hacked in return as well)]]. This train of spergery ended after it was revealed he was abusive towards Kylie (who would become one of his exes), and Keegan's world came crashing down upon him. After he got caught abusing Kylie, Keegan started degrading her at the speed of light. Keegan got [[butthurt]] over people rightfully calling out his perverted lard-ass and formed a new community out of his based ex-friends' cringe enemies to form an entire battalion of mental lolcows squirting lulzy milk 24/7. This [[retard]] was previously mentioned on [[Garrett_Simmers#Keegan|another page]] that was originally removed because he reported it and claimed it was "[[pussy|bullying him and invading his privacy]]". To be fair, he was just a whiny 9-year-old back then, but now he became a [[fat]] {{age|2004|9|15}}-year-old [[autistic]] pansexual who hasn't learned from his mistakes.
 
== The Beginning ==
[[File:E1G3EG2W 400x400.jpg|thumb|I came here to fuck bitches.]]
[[File:E1G3EG2W 400x400.jpg|thumb|I came here to fuck bitches.]]
'''Keegan James Salisbury''' (also known as MultiKeegster1, MultiKeegster2, KJS12, TheYtpMaker1000, YTPMaker1000, SourWashingMachine, Imageny, Empty Recycle Bin, xomdjl_, >nul, and Keegdog) is a severely autistic 17-year-old unwanted piece of shit, wannabe hacker, DDoSer and general fucktarded sped who wastes his time on the internet doing lots of shit [[no one cares]] about or other rubbish that rightfully drew the ire of many. This fat enby faggot usually sits on his chair making ytpmvs, whacking off to his many waifus, some of which are [[pedo|underaged]]; DDoSing and hacking people he doesn't like, overreacting over the slightest provocations, having autistic meltdowns and harassing every girlfriend he ends up getting together with.
[[File:Keegan.jpg|thumb|left|Ironically, this image was used from his previous ED article from when he was a retarded 9-year-old. The [[The Powerpuff Girls|Blossom]] [[plushophile|plush]] would make him a future [[manchild]].]]
On September 15, 2004, Karrie Flannigan/Salisbury/Ploman shat Keegan out of her vagina and bought him into the world. At a young age, Keegan was diagnosed with [[Ass Burgers]] and would constantly cry over the dumbest shit imaginable, throw temper tantrums and trash the house whenever he got mad - but his parents always excused it because of '''MUH AUTISM'''. Keegan's fucktarded parents made the extra effort to spoil his severely autistic ass and shower him with love that wasn't deserved. They bought all the toys, games, and electronics for his sorry lard-ass yet Keegan always behaved poorly. As Keegan started growing up and started puberty, he slowly morphed into a faggot who looks like a typically registered sex offender combined with [[Chris-Chan]] along with getting severe acne and a pedostache. Keegan also got violent mood swings once turning into a teenager, replacing the simple tantrums he had as a kid. Keegan admitted to beating up his parents and calling them [[nigger]]s. Sometime in about [[2010]], Keegan got his first social media account, named either MultiKeegster, MultiKeegster1, or 2.
{{center|<big>'''Keegan reviews the American Eagle'''</big>}}
{{center|<youtube>2HoVsDNWmtU</youtube>}}
<center>'''Cute kid, right? It's sad he turned out to be the revulsion he is today.'''</center>
 
=== I'M PLAYING ANGRY BIRDS FOR GOOGLE CHROME!! ===
On October 19, [[2012]], Keegan did a gameplay video of [[Angry Birds]] on [[Google Chrome]]. At one part in the original video, he told his mom to [[stfu|be quiet]] and that he's currently making a gameplay video for it. After his mom walked out, Keegan started [[fail|failing]] hard in the game and started to rage in his retarded midget kid voice. That moment was so funny that the original video he uploaded got memed to death in the comments section. Because Keegan can no longer access his old YT channel, it would stay there forever and Keegan can forever bask in the shame this video has bought upon him.
<center><youtube>3NhPvc2_RcE</youtube>
<br>'''4:10 is when the real fun begins. Skip to it for the best experience.'''</center>
 
== Keegan's Family ==
[[File:Are ya coding son keegan salisbury.png|thumb|left|An ordinary day in the Salisbury household.]]
[[File:Keeganmommy.png|thumb|Keegan's momma's half-assed attempt at defending her son.]]
Keegan's family also tends to be just as spergy and lulzy as the autistic son they have, which is likely a reason for how Keegan is this utterly fucktarded and autistic. They are Ian Sumran Salisbury (daddy) and Karrie Lynn Salisbury/Ploman/[[Dinosaur|Dactyl]] Flannigan (momma) and all they do is white knight their son online while making fools out of themselves online by associating with random [[retard|Autism Pride]] groups on Facebook and posting cringeworthy posts on social media, especially [[Twitter|Shitter]]. Mental retardation and terminal autism sure run in their family. Keegan also likes beating up his parents, especially his mommy when he gets [[butthurt]], hurling his flabby fists at them, screeching like a madman and calling them [[niggers]] and [[faggots]]. Ironically, Keegan gets butthurt when people say [[nigger]], which shows how much of a [[hypocrite]] he is.
 
People remain shocked to this day that Keegan's parents still [[whiteknight|defend]] him, especially his bitch-cunt whore of a mother who still defends him to death even when getting ratioed on Twitter and getting beaten up and unfollowed by her very own unappreciative, spastic abusive son. Keegan's violent spergouts are easily just as destructive as [[Joey The Autist]]'s, thus giving Keegan the new nickname of '''"Keegan the Autist"''', which is very accurate due to just how bloodthirsty, sadistic, and spergy he truly is. If Karrie and Ian truly had brains, they would've simply sent Keegan for adoption or even better, booked him for life into a mental hospital or asylum due to his sheer spergery making him beyond any form of repair.
 
It should also be worth noting that according to [[Shit no one cares about|a story that Keegan once told]], Karrie tried to stab Ian with a knife in [[2016]] and [https://www.shawlocal.com/2016/10/12/crystal-lake-police-reports-for-thursday-october-27-2016/awkuv87/ was charged with domestic battery]. Nobody knows what happened, but knowing how batshit insane his family is, that sounds accurate enough to have happened.
 
Rumor also has it that Keegan claimed to Kylie that his own mom was in a relationship with an abusive rapist musician known to most as [[Marilyn Manson]]. Nobody knows for sure if this was true or not, but knowing how delusional his slut of a mother is, it was likely all made up.
 
<center>'''The pictures below show some of Keegan's family's chimping out on social media, mainly Twitter...'''</center>
{{cg|'''Parental Abuse'''|aspiemommy|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Keegansalisburymommawhore.png|At least you're being honest.
File:KeeganAbusesHisParents.png|[[Homophobia]], and [[Racism]].
File:KarrieBitch.png|Defending someone who beat her up and called her a [[nigger]].
File:Ianpervert.png|The Daddy is a fucktard as well.
File:Karriepolitisperging.png|Defending [[Pedo|Joseph Rosembaum]] and [[Abuse|Anthony Huber]].
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Karriesimpingforkeegan.png|[[LOL|Keegan is hospitalized.]]
File:Karriedinowtf.png|Typical post on her embarrassing [[Twitter|Twattah]] account.
File:Karrieisbipolar.png|The bitch now claims to be [[Bipolar]].
File:Karriebipolarfucktard.png|Karrie reveals all the details about her spergery.
File:Keegansfucktardedfamily.png|Really, an adequate safety precaution against Keegan would be [[Fallout|Nuclear Justice]].
File:BlockedByKarrie.png|A common occurrence.
File:KeegansDaddy.png|A rare moment of sanity by this [[lolcow]] family.
</gallery>}}


==Who in the living fuck is this dude and why is this an article?==
{{center|<big>'''How to exorcise a demon from a Furby'''</big>}}
Some 17 year old kid who's been on the internet for a long time has done nothing but make shitty youtube poops and crappy ytpmv/otomads. He has done nothing but manipulate others by joining a community, finds a girl and then ends up harassing them to the point the girl gets extremely uncomfortable being on this planet.
{{center|<youtube>Zk3C-LV_8x8</youtube>}}
<center>'''You have to feel bad for his husband in this marriage, cause the wife is performing black magic on their son's Furby because she's a [[schizo]], how sad.'''</center>


== Keegan's Sex Slaves ==
== Keegan's Sex Slaves ==
The following faggots listed below are Keegan's new squad of <s>sex slaves</s> best friends and fuckbuddies that are also fellow outcasts like he is.
<center><youtube>j4PTf7LgsIE</youtube></center>
[[File:Isaac fucktard.png|thumb|center|1000px|Typical Keegan Stan]]
[[File:MelSchizo.png|thumb|[[Autism]].]]
[[File:MelFursuit.png|thumb|[[DO NOT WANT]]]]
 
[[File:Nasty faggots.gif|thumb|What the average Keegan simp does daily.]]
The following faggots listed below are Keegan's new squad of <s>sex slaves</s> best friends and fuckbuddies that are also fellow [[You|losers]] like he is. After he was ousted, most of his original friend group left him, so Keegan decided to rally their enemies together to form an entire army of fucktarded and mentally-impaired morons. When all of them are combined, they can easily walk into a museum and make themselves an exhibit, thus forming a Hall of Lolcows.


* {{twitter|CLoggermore}} - Also known as Mommadomma, she is an absolutely pea-brained, diaper-obsessed, disgusting, sweaty, smelly, stinky and mentally retarded bitch who is obsessed with Keegan to the point she decided to become a [[pedo]] just to own his haters. She makes some of the worst roleplays one can ever find, fills everything she says to the brim with her fucktarded diaper fetish shit obsession
*{{yt|c|UCSgHNRzhXG1er0XViZ3ZmJQ|AlextheTHXandSushiPackfan andNintendogamer}} - A braindead Gachatard who does nothing but fap to [[Shit|Sushi Pack]] all-day while blindly worshipping Keegan as if it was his religion or something.


* {{twitter|LewmioA}} - This shit-stained, cum-greased lint roller treated Ky like fucking shit and would complain nonstop while ignoring everyone else. He also defamed Baby Lamb Creations all for attention and his [[daddy]] made him do push-ups as a result. Now that his former friends hated him, he had no choice but to crawl back to Xomdjl_ like a massive pussy along with the fact that [[Geoshea]] was completed obliterated off the web. Also he hates Madness Combat as apparently the fandom treated him like [[shit]].
*{{twitter|Isaac71908660}} '''([[Powerword]]: Jeremy Isaac Scott Anthony)''' - A baby-faced [[crybaby]] that loves throwing tantrums on camera like a pussy while supporting RJ Kumar to no end. He's also known for constantly being aroused with a group full of mostly nothing but [[Vyond|GoFags]] and logotards called the '''Powerhouse of Entertainment (POE)''' to the point of milking the group to death and always wanting to come back to it every time people there would ban his ass. Ironically, the group was founded by [https://www.youtube.com/c/TheSuperlamont212 SLN! Media Group] '''([[Powerword]]: Lamont Meeks)''', someone who's a {{age|1999|2|12}}-year old [[autism|logofag]] [[pedophile]] [[nigger]] who was also mentioned on [[BlueCatRiolu#Fuckboys_and_white_knights_.28examples.29|another ED page]]. '''HE WANTS FUCKING LOVE!!!!'''


* '''Isaac''' - A baby-faced crybaby that loves throwing tantrums on camera like a pussy while supporting RJ Kumar to no end. '''HE WANTS FUCKING LOVE!!!!'''
*'''[[User:Johnqpublic299|Johnqpublic2990]]''' - Some random faggot that vandalized the page over and over for their lord and savior Keegan when in reality Keegan won't fuck them with his microcock. It may have been Keegan's school's IT Assistant, making this even funnier.


* {{twitter|WonderSauce2005}} - A chronically rude, backstabbing psychopath with severe buttsex addiction crippling him, especially when he does get to suck Isaac's weiner.
*{{twitter|LewmioA}} '''([[Powerword]]: Chance Tucker Sims)''' - This shit-stained, cum-greased lint roller treated Ky like fucking shit and would complain nonstop while ignoring everyone else. He also defamed Baby Lamb Creations all for attention and his [[daddy]] made him do push-ups as a result. Now that his former friends hated him, he had no choice but to crawl back to Xomdjl_ like a massive pussy along with the fact that [[Geoshea]] was completely obliterated off the web. Also, he hates Madness Combat as apparently, the fandom treated him like [[shit]].


* '''melsbacksfriend''' - A [[Furry|furry]] [[Aspie|aspie]] with a creepy obsession with [[Pokemon|Vaporeon]].
*{{twitter|JustAFan2005}} - A chronically rude, backstabbing psychopath from [[Texas]] and [[New York]] (why the fuck would you live in two [[American]] cities far away) with severe buttsex addiction crippling him, especially when he does get to suck Isaac's Weiner.


* {{twitter|RjGunner111}} - Some crazy curry nigger who tried stealing Roszina Head's email to sign it up for several mailing lists and would constantly cyberstalk her nonstop. He also enjoys have gay buttsex orgies together with Isaac and Seth,
*{{twitter|lamont_meeks}} - A {{age|1999|2|12}}-year old [[nigger]] [[Logo Kids|logofag]] and [[pedophile]] from [[Chicago|Chicago, Illinois]] who used to be well-known but got tainted after becoming a creep.


== The Beginning ==
*{{twitter|Melsbacksfriend}} '''([[Powerword]]: Benjamin Mickle)''' - A [[furry]] [[Aspie|aspie]] with a creepy obsession with [[Pokemon|Vaporeon]]. He also happens to be one of his real-life fuckbuddies. He also did a response video to the earlier version of this article about his gay fuckbuddy Keegan. This retard also thinks [[Chris Chan|Pokemon]] is real and is working on a program device thing to make his Vapereon [[disgusting|sexual dreams a reality.]] and likes to use same the most liberal tag on every social media site which is [[furry|fur fag]] [[Ass Burgers|gay]] equivalent to [[Black Lives Matter|BLM]] called Furries Lives Matter. And just like your run of the mile [[zoo]] manchild who's also a [[fag|furry]] [[dying alone | manchild]], this retard works a Chuck E. Cheese, which is the birthing grounds for [[gay]] [[furry|furry]] [[Ass Burgers|autistic]] retards like him. He also made cheap Chinese [[manchild|fursuit]] of his precious Vapoeron, which looks like it was made by [[manchild]] that became a serial killer and keeps [[dying alone| 5-year-old girls in his parent's basement]].
On September 15th 2004, Karrie Flannigan shat Keegan out of her vagina and bought him into the world. At a young age, Keegan was diagnosed with [[Ass Burgers]].
 
*{{twitter|RjGunner111}} - A crazy [[Indian|curry nigger]] from [[Wisconsin]] with a massive boner for gaming. In the summer of 2020, he had beef with [[IronKidFan8|CodeLyokoFan2002]] '''([[Powerword]]: Roszina Head)''', a [[United Kingdom|Bri'ish]] {{age|2002|07|27}}-year-old cartoon sperg and [[Manchild|womanchild]] who runs a Discord server called "Tell Us About It", or "TUAI" for short, which is dedicated to massive amounts of spergery over various topics, even hosting [[Shit|movie nights]] featuring [[Shit no one cares about|heavily obscure animated movies]], and also being subject to a shit ton of raids performed mostly by [[Underage|13-year-old]] [[JoJo's Bizarre Adventure]] fans alongside the curry nigger himself, and in response to the beef he signed up for several mailing lists and pornography websites using her e-mail. Ironically, he did the same shit towards Keegan as well back in summer 2020 before Keegan got back to him. He enjoys having gay buttsex orgies together with Isaac and Seth. Oddly enough Roszina finally got her own reputation ruined after her {{age|2000|10|31}}-year-old now ex-BF from [[Missouri]] named '''Duncan Burden''' broke up with her sorry ass.
 
*{{twitter|Sonohara}} - A greasy and disgusting backstabbing MtF tranny who makes shitty music and still gets into drama despite being a self-proclaimed [[Lie|professional musician]]. She is a manipulative asshat who was a complete bitch to the people at Joey's Pub. She also backstabbed one of her friends just to be a part of Keegan’s cult.
 
*'''Bugboyb''' - Some autistic [[pansexual]] poly grown man with an "UwU" attitude that Keegan met in the other server he got kicked out of, Lustiverse Sanctuary. They were fuckbuddies who often took advantage of each other's OCs and especially his "Victor" OC for ERPs. Because of his interactions with a minor like this, we suspect he could potentially be a pedophile.
 
* '''[[Engelbash]] ([[Powerword]]: Logan Michael Swan)''' - This fucktard is a [[brat|bratty]], [[butthurt]], blood-lusting, terminally [[autistic]], [[homophobic]], [[racist]], [[retarded]], vicious and mental sped with [[pedophile|pedophilic]] and [[zoophile|zoophilic]] tendencies who is obsessed with blowing bubblegum and making huge bubbles. He also loves disgusting snot bubbles like Carl Wheezer from [[Jimmy Neutron]]'s one, bunnies such as the Pink Berets from [[Despicable Me]], Peter Rabbit, Cottontail, the Rabbids from the Rayman franchise, [[Invader Zim]], Fanboy and Chum Chum, [[Jimmy Neutron]], My Life as a Teenage Robot and many more shitty TV series, mainly from [[Nickelodeon]]. He spends all day in his shitty [[Discord]] server tard-raging about [[shit no one cares about]], having idiotic roleplays where he rps as users he hates and uses his [[Geoshea|"Geo Guy"]] and "Evil Larry" tuppers to spam the word "[[nigger]]" and use @everyone pings to annoy the hell out of everyone. He also likes making fun of [[9/11]], fapping to child porn all day, and generally being a [[sick fuck]] that is completely mental and retarded. This freak also has an army of goons that love spamming the shit out of others on multiple platforms or inviting them to troll group chats. During Keegan's involvement with the Meming Crew, back when he and Logan were enemies, he made multiple attempts to get in contact with Logan's mom, with most attempts being [[Epic Win|successful]]. The first time, it led to Logan's laptop getting taken away by his mom. He has done it multiple times since the last time he did so being when Logan was last seen saying "[[nigger]]" on Discord. Too bad Keegan ended up turning into the fucktard he [[Bullshit|desperately avoided trying to turn into]]. Did we also forget to mention that Engel himself is fuckbuddies with [[Seunghwan Lee]]? Today, Keegan and Logan have pretty much-become fuckbuddies again.
 
===Salty Tears===
{| style="margin: 0 auto"
|{{frame|{{videoframe|RYTP|background-color: #DBD8CD;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>7bm8jEw6kgM</youtube> <br> <center>'''Benjamin Mickle's Autism: PART ONE'''</center>
|[[File:Benajmin Mickle's meltdown.mp4]] <br> <center>'''Benjamin Mickle's Autism: PART TWO'''</center>
|[[File:Isaac Wants Love.mp4]] <br> <center>'''Logan Swan's third triplet brother wants love.'''</center>
}}|border=#000000|background=#FFFFFF}}
|}
 
As stated in this <s>sex slaves</s> section of this article, his [[furfag|furry friend]] '''Melsbacksfriend''' ranted about the page of his [[Ass Burgers|autistic friend]] and basically went on retard rant about this site mocking his in real life friend Keegan and ED mocking his obsession with [[Pokemon]], which is the most manchild-ist game series typically loved by [[manchild|these severely autistic types]], like...[[Chris-Chan]]. Being a DecomcRAT and liberal piece of shit, he decided to put [[Black Lives Matter|Furry Lives Matter]] as fucking tag of this video. Speaking of [[furfag|furries]], the retard ranted about the [[furfag|furries page as well.]] along with getting [[butthurt]] over the [[Ass Burgers]] and [[Pokémon]] pages, although this website is all satire. Now, you can tell this retard is as retarded as his friend Keegan when he rants about the site too. His microphone is also fucking terrible, or it's just his severe autism hindering his voice as it happens in many autists as well. And as for the fucktard on the right, that is Isaac and his infamous '''I WANT LOVE!!!''' video.
 
{{cg|'''Autofellatio'''|aspiefriends|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:KeeganAndRJSeething.png|The [[white devil]] and [[India|curry nigger]] seethe.
File:RJ Kumar IRL.png|The curry nigger in the flesh.
File:Mommafucktard.png|Seething on the inside.
File:KeeganZoophile.png|Keegan is now fascinated by [[Zoophile|Eevee dicks]].
File:MelDisgusting.png|Benjamin Mickle being a perverted [[zoophile]] as usual.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:CaillouPenisEnlargement.png|More disgusting shit from Ben.
File:FurryLivesDontMatter.png|Bencuck coping.
File:MelsCertificate.png|Proof of Melsbacksfriend's real name.
File:KeeganAndMommadomma.png|Two fucktards sperging out as usual.
File:MELWTF.png|Typical question in their group chat.
</gallery>}}
 
== Keegan's Enemies ==
[[File:Mcautism.jpg|thumb|Some of Keegan's enemies regularly use this.]]
[[File:Keegannikocadocomparison.png|thumb|link=Nikocado Avocado|The resemblance is uncanny.]]
While Keegan has a roving band of fucktards that obey his every command due to being fellow outcasts like he is, Keegan has also made a shit ton of enemies due to his constant spergery and terrible attitude. Because he has so many enemies, we had to make a separate page for his enemies.
 
{{Main|Keegan Salisbury/Enemies}}
 
== Taking in Constructive Criticism==
{{quote|THESE PEOPLE ARE PROVING EXACTLY WHY I DON'T DESERVE TO LIVE. IF I WASN'T SUCH A PUSSY I WOULD HAVE ACTUALLY GONE FOR IT. I'VE BEEN TRYING TO WORK ON MYSELF, BUT THESE MOTHERFUCKERS DON'T EVEN REALIZE IT AND THEY JUST COMPLETELY DISREGARD IT. INSTEAD ALL I GET IN RETURN IS "I'M SORRY DOZZY, FORGIVE ME!", "YOU! WILL! GET! PERMABANNED!" AND "BE QUIET MOM, I'M MAKING A VIDEO FOR PLAYING ANGRY BIRDS FOR GOOGLE CHROME, JESUS CHRIST!"}}
[[Image:Donvito.gif|thumb|right|180px|Accurate depiction of Keegan responding to criticism.]]
[[File:Joeytheautist.gif|thumb|left|Long lost brother?]]
Typical to a person with [[Ass Burgers]], Keegan is incapable of taking in any sort of criticism whatsoever, even [[pussy]] [[faggot]] constructive criticism. Anger him one slight bit or trigger his "PTSD" with any one of the thousands of triggers that will make him go berserk and trigger an autistic meltdown from him and BOOM!, he spergs out like a mad dog infected with rabies. If on the computer, he'll immediately block and permaban you like a control freak and [[Reddit]] moderator (only if he has dem sweet mod perms), and if IRL, he will hurl his flabby fists at you and try killing you in a fit of [[tard rage]]. Keegan often claims that [[Lie|he can take criticism]] but this has been not the case many times, probably for every time; but he will never face the truth due to being too much of a [[coward]]. All Keegan wants is to live in a perpetual ass-kissing 24/7 hugbox where all his waifus like Kani Maki and Starfire will come to life and have [[BDSM]] gangbangs together in his filthy sex dungeon while braindead children who get their entertainment out of crappy grounded videos constantly shower his cow shit videos with a ton of likes.<br>
 
===How to piss off Keegan===
* Make video remixes of the infamous "permabanned" video - he will of course abuse the [[DMCA]] process in an attempt to get it taken down.
* Compare him to either [[Chris-Chan]], [[Harvey Weinstein]], or Oscar Ferguson, a lolcow who doesn't have an article here.
* Make fun of him by using any of his older videos, e.g. Angry Birds for Google Chrome
* Tell him to become [[an hero]] - He's considered it before!
* Bring up his past or current actions
* Mention anyone from the friend group that [[Bullshit|"betrayed"]] him, like Kylie, Garrett, Connor/Domma, and Samuel.
* Say you ate his waifu's family.
* Flood his e-mail with spam - This has happened before, only except the [[Indian|curry nigger]] Rj who was mentioned earlier did it while Keegan was still sucking off of Roszina's massive lady dick. Gunnnar has since become [[fuckbuddies]] with him.
* Make prank calls to his cell phone
 
==Getting Tipped by The Police==
Sometime back in February 2018, some {{age|1996|09|10}}-year old [[retarded]] [[Philippines|pinoy]] pedophile from [[Canada]] named '''[[HeyItsBowman]]/BronyMult ([[Powerword]]: John Aguilar)''' tipped that fat fuck to the police. The tip turned out to be successful as later that month, the police contacted Karrie and made her take Keegan down to the police station for questioning. Following this incident, he decided to leave Garrett's Meming Crew (when it was The Raiding Crew) [[LMFAO|like the pussy he is because of this.]] His school was even made aware of this by Keegan himself and his family and he said Garrett encouraged him to do all the lulzy shit he did. Bowman later outed himself in October of 2022 for grooming a 15 year old girl in 2018 (keep in mind she's 19 now). He even also threatened to assrape Keegan and murder Keegan's family back in 2016 when he was 11-12 years of age.
 
He has not learned jackshit from it ever since. Matter of fact, the dipshit got in legal trouble yet again but this time it was because he stalked one of his IRL exes, Chloe. We elaborate on this later on in the article.
 
==ERP with Jai Heart==
Some time ago when Keegan was a whiny 8-year-old brat, this fucker fell into the victims of Jai Heart, a gross piece of shit who physically abused his Ex resulting in getting kicked out of the YTP and YTPMV community as well. Jai Heart made a Skype account pretending to be Rainbow Dash and would try to fool Keegan to do ERP with him. This led to Keegan getting kicked off of Skype as Jai and a few of his fuckbuddies sent it over to his dad.
 
The ERP Jai Heart did to Keegan ultimately lead to Keegan doing ERP with Kylie 10 years later.  


== Angry Birds for Google Chrome ==
You can read the full thread of Keegan’s experience with Jai Heart [https://twitter.com/ksal04_/status/1415116638194655236?s=21&t=kwZmF4xZQosbWQl1Ze99Tg here].


===Keegan's Love Quest!!!===
== Keegan's Love Quest ==
[[File:E bQP7VgAYj5pv.png|thumb|Quick everyone, act like you're scared!]]
[[File:E bQP7VgAYj5pv.png|thumb|Quick everyone, act like you're scared!]]
Similar to [[Chris-chan]], who has a love quest by trying to get together with girls, Keegan has made a similar approach to wanting to fall in love with girls too. His recent ex-girlfriend, broke up with him cause of his sexually abusive attitude towards her. Fearing that his waifu would leave him forever, Keegan tried to use his permaban powers to bring her back to her server as well as forcing her to buy lewd clothes for herself so Keegan can jack his twizzler-esque microwang on her. After the breakup, Keegan felt very [[DO IT FAGGOT|suicidal]] and developed a [[LOL|pornography addiction]] due to no longer having Ky to sexually abuse and live out his deranged incel fantasies.
[[File:Sexquest Keegan.png|thumb|It may be hard to see, but here, Keegan is using his permaban powers to keep his waifu forever.]]
[[File:KeeganChloe.png|thumb|Schizoposting or truth?]]
The following list down below is Keegan’s love quest, similar to Chris-Chan, Keegan has had a series where he falls in love with a girl but at one point he fucks up so badly he then goes “depressed mode” and then harasses them. So far, Keegan has failed miserably in all of them, with his latest being his most miserable failure next to Ky as he got rejected by not one, but two fucking girls and one of them is a fucking [[tranny]].


==Midori's Document of Keegan==
==== Helen ====
Some random douche who is writing this article under the name of Midori (formerly Green ProDuctions Universe), who was a firmer friend of Keegan, made a ytpmv of keegan (at the same time shoving a bunch of Japanese sources into the ytpmv as well as writing a whole ass document of Keegan and his wrongdoings). Keegan hasn't learned shit from Midori and proceeds to get everyone to forgive him, heck half the people who watches Midori's content has already acknowledge Keegan's bullshit over the past years and so.
Sometime in 2016 or 2017, Keegan started his le epic love quest by establishing a relationship with some autistic spic named '''[[Powerword|Helen Cortes]]'''. Not much is known about her, but Helen later dumped him after a couple of weeks.
 
==== Jeffy-Chan ====
After Helen failed, Keegan began another relationship, this time with a severely autistic and mentally retarded [[white devil]] known as '''Jeffy-Chan''' ([[Powerword]]: '''Brianna Hansen'''). She's known to be aroused with [[SuperMarioLogan|Jeffy faggotory]], hence the name. Despite their relationship going on for about 4 years, they barely did jackshit for it. At one time, the retarded snowflake himself went on a date with her to Chuck E. Cheese. The relationship all ended when Keegan found Kylie and started lusting after her, thinking that she would be more willing to fuck him.
 
Keegan and Ben also have an [[forced meme|unfunny inside joke]] surrounding Jeffy-Chan's supposed "super strict" mother ([[Powerword]]: '''Dina Hansen'''), where every time someone annoys them or is super strict towards them, one of them says "Shut up, Dina." to that guy. They also simply say "Dina!" whenever something got removed or blocked.
 
==== Kylie ====
'''Before they dating, Keegan dumped Garrett and started becoming aroused all around her to the point she became his biggest property more than Garrett...'''
 
But now, they recently broke up with each other, partially because of his sexually abusive attitude towards her, and partially due to how [[LOL|unstable]] Kylie was. Fearing that his waifu would leave him forever, Keegan tried to use his [[faggotry|permaban powers]] to bring her back to the server they owned together as well, along with trying to manipulate her into having an erotic roleplay with him while she was babysitting her younger brother, along with buying her lewd clothes on Amazon so Keegan can jack his Twizzler-Esque micropenis to her. After the breakup, Keegan felt very [[DO IT FAGGOT|suicidal]] and developed a [[LOL|pornography addiction]] due to no longer having a woman to [[sexting|sext]] and live out his deranged incel fantasies.
 
Since Keegan has developed an addiction to sex in general and trying to fuck every girl, someone caught Keegan in the act of him becoming a [[lolicon]]. Sometimes before the breakup, Keegan and his ex were arguing in the DMs, leading Keegan to use his Angry Birds for Google Chrome and Permaban powers to keep her forever, which resulted in her trying to break up because of how much of a crazy dumbfuck Keegan is, unlike anything that has happened before. This also led to communities such as the YTP and YTPMV, [[Vyond|GoAnimate]] and [[Closing Logos Wiki|closing logo]] communities to exile him from their communities for Keegan's awful behavior, which also led to Keegan getting kicked off of the Wrapper: Offline development team. These messages also reveal Keegan would always talk to her shirtless so he can fap towards her too, which shows how sickening this guy is. It has also been shown that Keegamber Heard would mimic some of Kylie's behaviors online, even copying certain opinions for example.
 
Keegan has sperged out at Kylie quite a few times, to the point where he has left quite a few voicemails with threatening auras towards her.
<br>
<center>
{|
| [[File:Keegan_Voicemail_1.mp3|thumb|Damn, he sperged out pretty hard there!]] || [[File:Keegan_Voicemail_2.mp3|thumb|Dad WILL be called.]]
|}
</center><br>
 
<br>
<center>
{|
| [[File:Keegan_Voicemail_3.mp3|thumb|Fake apology.]] || [[File:Keegan_Voicemail_4.mp3|thumb|Yet another fake apology.]]
|}
</center><br>
 
There was at one point during their “KeegLie” ship that they were gonna meet, with a road trip to New Jersey. Despite Keegan being an SJW Liberal, he is scared of the needle and refused to get the vaccine. This resulted in the road trip getting canceled and Keegan cussing his parents out. Luckily they didn’t meet, otherwise, Kylie herself would’ve been raped. That is the sad truth.
 
==== [[Garrett Simmers]] ====
Formerly longtime best friends with him, up until recently. Keegan tried going polyamorous with him and Kylie together only to call it quits after like a few hours due to some of Nancer's [[fuckbuddies]] canceling him over it, as well as him finally starting to extremely fear the dick he so claims to crave, but fears due to being straight as a ruler and not the Leaning Tower of Piza. There's a very outdated article on this man with the only accurate info being shit people have known for half a decade. Garrett has since become a redeemed lolcow, much like [[SammyClassicSonicFan]], but the same can't be said for the other fucktards listed here, and especially Keegan himself.
 
==== Chloe ====
Just some girl [[nobody cares about|no one gives a fuck about]] who was at Keegan's school, other than that not much is known about her. There is a possibility that they may have had sex and Keegan Cosby bragged about getting kissed and having sex with her behind the back of the car with a condom on. However knowing Keegan, he most likely didn't fuck her and was simply saying this after a Mommadomma-induced schizophrenic episode or simply trying to spite some of his enemies. Any Chloe that dated him has already broken up with him so Keegan might as well call it quits.
 
Not too long ago, Keegan got into a heated argument with Chloe, even going as far as to [[rage]] in ALL CAPS at her. The gallery below shows the infamous battle of spergery between the 2.<br>
 
{{cg|'''Keegan vs. Chloe'''|keeganvschloe|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:KeeganChloeDrama1.jpg|Unsurprisingly, Keegan was the first one in this fight to sperg out.
File:KeeganChloeDrama2.jpg|One thing she doesn't realize is both are equally as bad.
File:KeeganChloeDrama3.jpg|Attention-Seeker Chloe and Keegan The Autist; the dynamic duo.
File:KeeganChloeDrama4.jpg|Uh oh, looks like the little [[faggot]] told all his friends about the article after all!
File:KeeganChloeDrama6.jpg|Keegan always puts the blame on people who didn't do shit.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:KeeganChloeDrama7.jpg|Nobody has any idea what those voice messages were about, but knowing Keegan it was probably him sperging out again.
</gallery>}}<br>
 
However, they eventually got along again after what happened. Keegan does seem to be spending a lot of time with her [[IRL]] lately and has claimed that he was fine with just being friends with her. According to a third party who has been keeping an active eye on Keegan, they eventually split apart again following another argument that happened without any sort of reasoning.
 
Between April and June of 2022, it was shown that Keegan abused and groomed Chloe the same way he abused Kylie. He used multiple burners Snapchat and SMS accounts to threaten her with violence and went as far as to leak her lewd (but censored) and dox on a burner TikTok account, likely because the fat fuck himself was still pissed that Chloe rightfully cut him off. One of the most serious allegations made by Chloe against Keegan was that he and his friends made threats of gang rape on her voice mail and that he tried to come to Chloe's house to inflict harm upon her. Initially, he denied doing those, but knowing his nature he very likely lied about it and is trying to look innocent and cover up the fact that he made the poor girl fear for her life.
 
{{cg|'''Total Restraining Order'''|tro|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:KeeganChloeLegal1.jpg
File:KeeganChloeLegal2.jpg
File:KeeganChloeLegal3.jpg
File:KeeganChloeLegal4.jpg|KEEGAN [[WTF]]
File:KeeganChloeLegal5.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:KeeganChloeLegal6.jpg
File:KeeganChloeLegal7.jpg
File:KeeganChloeLegal8.jpg
</gallery>}}<br>
 
==== Kaylie ====
There's no info about her other than the fact that she told Keegan to stop talking to her after Keegan constantly begged her for favors [[Quinton Reviews]]-style on his school Gmail.
 
==== Sammi and Zuzu ====
[[File:Keegan breaks up with sammi.png|thumb|240px|left|[[EPIC FAIL]]]]
[[File:LMFAOKeegan.png|thumb|[[LOL]]]]
After repeated [[fail]] with many of his previous waifus he was planning to molest and fap to all day, Keegan thought going poly would be a good idea and later tried hooking up with random girls from other servers. He first found Sammi, a 19-year-old tranny from [[Canada]] whom he immediately fell in love with as s(he)? shared similar interests with him along with being an autist as well. Later, Keegan met a new girl named Zuzu who is a [[16-year-old girl]], and lived to hear him. Keegan says both have similar interests to him, though it was likely that Keegan was simply pulling shit out of his ass and trying to fake his interests as he was so desperate to get a girl and love.
 
Keegan started bragging about it on Twitter, but then Zuzu decided to "randomly" break up with him, even though it was more likely she just realized how nasty Keegan is in general, or thought his IRL face is [[ugly]] [[truth|(it is)]]. Keegan said it wouldn't affect him, yet he was most likely seething hard in secret. Then Sammi the Tranny decided to break up with him as demonstrated in the picture on the right! Keegan again tried coping but instead seethed so hard he shed a thousand tears on that day.
 
==== Arika Warzynski ====
Not much is known about her other than the fact that Keegan said on Facebook briefly that he was taken by her and also the fact that she is a 21-year-old [[weeb]] [[Manchild|womanchild]] and [[stalker]] who graduated from Keegan's school. Keegan foolishly did not hesitate to tell others about his experience with her, but little did he know he was dating a possible [[pedophile]] and lolcow. The stories Keegan has told involve Arika taking random photos of current students from Keegan's school she supposedly "had a crush on" online, putting them in FaceApp, and using the [[Rule 63|genderswap]] feature, printing out the resulting image onto big, laminated paper at the FedEx place and [[Schizo|pretending they're real people]], even going as far as to [[WTF|make up whole stories, personalities and everything about them]]. She also carries around a plush of a [[Sailor Moon]] character out in public, much like [[Matthew Davis]] with Morgana from Persona 5. Keegan has also stated before that she [[Multiple Personality Disorder|pretends to be multiple people and channels it through certain items, such as the shit she prints out at FedEx]]. Eventually one day, Arika randomly broke up with Keegan after just a couple of days. They continued to be friends up until recently when Keegan's school's social worker told him that he has to cut Arika off, which he ended up doing. Arika has kept a low profile online and has only been known to do lulzy shit IRL, according to the stories Keegan has told.
 
{{cg|'''The Lovesick Autist'''|mmmmm|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:KeeganGoesFaggot.png|Keegan is considering becoming a [[faggot]] for real this time.
File:KeeganGoesPoly.png|Keegan wants a threesome.
File:KeeganHatesJeffychan.png|Now he claims [[Bullshit|Brianna is abusive.]]
File:KeeganIsCWC.png|Self-own.
File:KeeganMeetsSister.png|The sister is rightfully disgusted by that fucking freak.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:KEEGAN GETS REJECTED LMFAO.png|Get fucked, you fat greasy autist.
File:KeeganMeltdown.png|Another autistic tantrum.
File:KeeganPervert.png|Let's play "Guess Who's The [[Sick Fuck]]"! Is it Ky? Is it Keegan? Is it both of them?
File:KeeganSeethe.png|What a fucking [[retard]].
File:KeeganSickPervert.png|More of Keegan's sexual depravity.
File:KeegansNonApology.png|Not real or genuine in the slightest.
File:Keegan comparing relationships.png|For someone who once was demisexual, you sure as hell love comparing yourself to other races and other couples.
File:KeeganObsessesOverKylie.png|More Love Quest fuckery.
File:GF equal's a furry's wet dream.png|UUUHHH, excuse me?
File:Furry sexual eye comparesion.png|It's ironic, that you compare your girlfriend to sexual [[furry]] material.
File:KeeganIsMad.png|Keegan hates it when you imply he is a [[pedo]].
File:KeeganTardRaging.png|Keegan smashing his keyboard
File:KeeganCrybabyFaggot.png|Suicide baiting as usual I see?
File:KeeganSuicideBaiting.png|Do the world a favor [[plz]] and become [[an hero]].
File:KeeganXanax.png|[[DO IT FAGGOT]]!!!
</gallery>}}
 
== Keegan's "Art" and Cartoon Spergery==
[[File:keeganstation.jpg|thumb|250px|Keegan's [[battlestation|permastation]]]]
[[File:Kani human v2 by imagenydoeszeart ddnjxrs-fullview.png|thumb|I swear, his [[shit|art]] looks like if both [[Rick and Morty]] and [[The Simpsons]] animators took acid and bath salts.]]
Like many other autistic speds trying out drawing to be like the cartoonists they revere as literal [[god|gods]], Keegan has tried making art before as an addition to his shitty YTPs and YTPMVs. Keegan so far has proven to be incapable of making any sort of quality work at all, with the best drawings he can muster being nothing more than sloppily-drawn shitstains on a huge pile of garbage. After being rightfully mocked for making various garbage or self-indulgent porn of his waifu, Keegan closed down his ImagenyDoesZeArt account like a pussy. After he was busted for abusing Kylie, Keegan got even more hate comments on his DA. For some odd reason, Keegan kept these comments up despite ghosting on this account sometimes.
 
Keegan also has an obsession with many cartoons, such as ''Teen Titans'', ''Sushi Pack'', ''Super Robot Monkey Team Hyperforce Go!'', along with some animes, and more. Most show that Keegan likes either having him [[autism|"Kinning"]] a character or making one of the female characters in the cartoon/anime one of his many waifus; he often does both at the same time and will ship his self-insert or kin with one of his waifu. Keegan also requested many Rule 34 artists to [[Zoophile|draw porn of Kani Maki]], the crab sushi thing from the shitty show ''Sushi Pack'' even though he was [[underage]], which potentially got a fuckton of people in trouble. That not only shows how perverted this submoronic imbecile is but also how much of an inconsiderate fucktard who doesn't give two midget shits about others he is.
 
[[File:KeeganWTF.png|thumb|center|400px|Don't let that poor grammar fool you, this sounds like something Keegan would say.]]
 
{{cg|'''More of Keegan's shitty art'''|keeganart|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:KeeganFox.png|This art is [[Epic Fail|clearly referenced]].
File:Snap by imagenydoeszeart dea4ot7-fullview.png|Nice stolen background, jackass.
</gallery>}}
 
== Keegan's Waifuism ==
[[File:Sushi pack fucking sucks lol.png|thumb|Sushi Pack is trash.]]
[[File:KeeganWaifuist.png|thumb|More self-shipping [[autism]].]]
{{Breakingnews|Apparently Keegan's no longer a waifuist, as evident by some of his older TikToks. He even beat up the Kani doll.}}
Being the self-serving and egotistical prick he is, Keegan is a certified waifuist who thinks that he [[Autism|can talk to cartoon characters from a digital screen despite it being completely impossible]]. Keegan likes licking cartoon screens and going on random waifu subreddits where he proclaims his love for cartoon characters has taken a liking, such as Starfire, and of course, Kani Maki that retarded '''TOMBOY''' pink crab he whacks his microcock off to the most.
 
Keegan proclaims himself to be a self-shipper, which is a short form of an autistic or bipolar shut-in that has spent too much time watching [[cartoons]] and/or [[anime]] in their [[basement]] that gets obsessed with one character and spergs out when someone else finds the character attractive or thinks they're bad/annoying or simply dislikes them. Self-shippers are most often severely autistic and automatic lolcows online, and Keegan is no exception, especially when considering the other lolcow traits he has, such as Angry Birds for Google Chrome and PERMABANNING!!!1
 
=== Shit he likes===
[[File:ProofOfPurchase.png|thumb|Proof that he wasted quite a bit of money on her like a [[simp]] would do. Notice how he foolishly left his MasterCard and Kylie's address uncensored.]]
 
*'''[[Faggot|Being a part of LGBT community]]''' - Yet, the motherfucker has never had a boyfriend, Keegan is just addicted to the clout like any typical Twitter addict so he fakes being LGBT for dem brownie points.
*'''[[Beavis and Butt-head]]''' - Has its own page. Both the main characters are fucking retarded, [[Truth|which is what Keegan is]].
*'''Care Bears''' - Specifically, the 2000s cartoon [[no one cares]] about. A crowd-pleaser with [[manchildren]], which are exactly his type.
*'''Cats''' - Surprisingly, the retard isn't a fucking furry even though he likes cats, though the possibility of him being a [[zoophile]] isn't out of the question.
*'''Clone High''' - A failed [[MTV]] cartoon from hasbeens Phil Lord and Chris Miller that managed to cause [[Lulz|a hunger strike]] in [[India]]. Keegan enjoys fapping to the [[goth]] chick Joan of Arc.
*'''[[Logo Kids|Closing logos]]''' - Like any other [[autist]], he specializes in collecting closing logos. He wants to catch his eyes on that fucking TAT Communications Company logo and have anal sex with it once, no wonder he fucking called Sony over finding the logo.
*'''Codename: Kids Next Door''' - A 2000s cartoon about kids rebelling against adults. There's [[Jailbait|a lot of naked kids]] in it, which gives Keegan a lot of fap material. He especially loves Numbuh 3.
*'''davemadson''' - A washed-up [[Generation X|{{age|1964|7|28}}-year-old]] [[YouTuber]] that creates Speakonia videos involving [[Closing Logos Wiki|logos]]. Keegan has an [[Fetish|interest]] in his "[[Garbage|work]]", and has managed to create similar work in the past.
*'''Empire Today''' - See "Gracie Films". This is another company about improving houses that Keegan likes to [[I came|cream his pants]] over. Their phone number is also his personal [[forced meme]].
*'''[[Vyond]]''' - The community is filled to the brim with [[autists]] who make grounded videos out of characters from [[pedo|baby shows]]. Keegan being both an unfunny and untalented Vyond Video Maker along with being an abuser makes him idolized by this garbage community.
*'''Gracie Films''' - Just like [[Erik "Tazman" Mokracek|Erik Mokracek]] and your stereotypical [[autist]], Keegan has an unhealthy fetish for company logos. He also has a [[forced meme]] of it based around its [[YouTube]] uploaders.
*'''Homestar Runner''' - Not much is known about it other than the fact Keegan's been a fan of it since [[2011]] and often uses it as a source in his shitty YTPMVs.
*'''Luna Carpet''' - His secondary [[forced meme]], [[Unoriginal|with the same exact premise]]. See "Empire Today".
*'''[[Schizophrenia|Monster Allergy]]''' - Keegan has a massive boner for [[Scene kid|Elena Potato]], and tried to justify his [[Autism|ship]] by [[Retarded|noting the lack of playgrounds in their school]].
*'''[[Lazy|Oban Star Racers]]''' - IGPX for [[France|cheese-eating surrender monkeys]].
*'''Sam and Max''' - Keegan likes this game and sees himself as Max, the hyperactive trigger-happy rabbit "thing". Accurate as Keegan would one day get a [[School Shooting|high score]] at a school [[Adam Lanza]]-style.
*'''Super Robot Monkey Team Hyperforce Go!''' - A [[Wapanese]] cartoon [[Goatse|pulled out of]] [[Disney]]'s [[Goatse|asshole]] that got [[Fail|cancelled after two seasons]]. Keegan likes fapping to Nova for the tomboy's sake.
*'''Sushi Pack''' - Perhaps his biggest source of fap material yet. Think [[Powerpuff Girls]] mixed with [[Anime|Fighting Foodons]]. His [[waifu]] has her headline.
*'''[[The Simpsons]]''' - Has its own page. He loves it with a capital L, mainly because it's where that logo he likes to fap to mainly shows up. He claims to have been a long-time fan of this show.
*'''[[The Powerpuff Girls]]''' - He used to love this show as a kid, fucking hell he even had a [[plushophile|plush]] of Blossom from the PPG.
*'''[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtENAHEG5ng4GVDoDT7gkog Tom Karlsson]''' - A random [[Swede]] from [[YouTube]] that managed to catch his attention by...[[Autism|A Gracie Films video.]] Every day, he worships him like fucking [[God]]. Knowing his autism, it's not that new, since it's also a [[forced meme]].
*'''[[Tomboy]]s''' - He's a fucking incel who slides into butch lesbians' DMs only to be met with disappointment by realizing they're taken.
*'''[[Totally Spies]]''' - Pronz, pronz, pronz! The show is also nothing but glorified fetishes put on the air for some godforsaken reason which is why Keegan likes it a lot, due to being a massive pervert with a tomboy fetish.
*'''Wayside''' - Another [[Canada|Canadian]] cartoon from the 2000's he spergs over. He likes fapping to the love-crazy [[dyke]] bitch Mauricia, and would even [[Pedophilia|sexualize the girls from the show.]]
*'''[[YTPMV]]''' - Stuff he specializes in making on [[Sony Vegas]] and [[Death|REAPER]]. They usually suck, with loads of unnecessary plugins and VSTs by shoving them into his throat, heck, the community wouldn’t even let him back in!
 
=== History of known "waifus" ===
* '''[[My Little Pony|Rainbow Dash]]''' - Specifically, the one from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. May have possibly been Keegan's first one, dating way back to mid-2013. Once ERPed with someone on Skype pretending to be Rainbow Dash around that same period.
 
*'''Kani Maki''' - He treated this cartoon crab-like she was his god and got [[offended]] when [[Lulz|someone says they ate her family]].
 
*'''Starfire from Teen Titans''' - Was the second fiddle to Kani Maki, [[Pedo|but Keegan also lusted after her despite Starfire likely being 16.]]
 
As of writing, Keegan has not shown any signs of waifuism and has likely left it behind. Good progress, but [[Truth|you're still a fucking retard]].
 
== Keegan's Tard Rage ==
[[File:The Twins Themselves.jpg|thumb|Send this in Keegan's DMs for maximum [[lulz]]]]
[[File:KeeganMiddleFingers.png|thumb|Keegan's average reaction to shit he hates.]]
While Keegan is known to have an intense lust for many things, he also fucking hates many others as well. Like Lewmio/Lenny the Lint Roller's extreme hateboner for Madness Combat all because he pissed off its fandom for being an insufferable asswipe, Keegan has a blazing hatred for many other things, most notably [[Battle For Dream Island]] and his lack of trust in the 2 [[China|rice nigger]] brothers who created the show. Keegan doesn't just type out massive [[TL;DR]] rants on how much he hates the show, but sometimes even draws cringeworthy [[hate art]] of them to vent his [[tard rage]].
 
=== Hate Boners ===
*'''[[Battle For Dream Island|Battle for Dream Island]]''' - Formerly one of his all-time favorites, this would eventually become Keegan's #1 most hated show of all time, to the point where this enby sex offender almost forced everyone, including Kylie, to hate BFDI. This made a fuck ton of people pissed off, however, they couldn't stand up to it at that time or else he would bring down his dreaded '''PERMABAN POWERS.''' He claims to have been good friends with Michael Huang, however being the [[autistic]] little [[faggot]] that he is, he silently cut him off and assumed that BFDI ruined Kylie when in reality, it was [[My mom just died|the death of a loved one]] which made her not feel right for a while. There is just one exception to this, however; Kylie often [[Schizo|thought that she was actually Bubble]] and planned to become [[an hero]] if Bubble ever got eliminated from any of the current seasons of the show.
 
*'''[[Bluey]]''' - A random [[Australia|Australian Down Under]] baby show that pedophiles and babyfurs concerningly obsess over, which of course had to give Keegan "PTSD". This was the start of when Keegan made a forbidden media list where he would show his hate boners to various shows. [[Hazbin Hotel]] on his DNI when?
 
*'''[[Disgusting|Brushing His Teeth]]''' - Keegan really hates brushing his teeth as it gives him what he calls a [[autism|"sensory overload"]]. One day Keegan will get so disgusting that [[WTF|maggots will start festering on his greasy, rank hair]] and given enough time, they'll develop space travel like as in the [[Family Guy]] episode where [[LOL|Stewie dies]]. It can be assumed he has cavities at this point. '''BRUSH YOUR FUCKING TEETH!'''
 
*'''Medical Needles/Syringes/Vaccines''' - Although Karrie and Ian are [[Democrats]], Keegan instead became an anti-vaxxer, and is very terrified of the vaccine due to them giving him a [[Autism|"Sensory Overload"]]. Keegan once threw a tantrum all because his liberal momma wanted him to get vaxxed when he was too fucking terrified to get the needle. The result of his not getting the vaccine led to his road trip to New Jersey to meet Kylie getting canceled and then Keegan calling his parents Niggers.
 
*'''Pretty Cure''' - Some girly anime for babies that plenty of [[Geoshea]] white knights such as pmpkunhunii, OisinFan62, and MikeP regularly whack off too while Kylie is a fan of it. Because of some [[pedo]] known as CureLovelyWarrior who groomed Ky, Keegan got so fucked-up and began hating it to death. He only hated it more after breaking up with Kylie, showing how easily shit gets ruined for him.
 
*'''Shaving His Face''' - Keegan hates cleaning his rancid facial hair and is too cowardly to use a fucking shaver so he has developed all sorts of disgusting beards and mustaches if they can even qualify as proper ones. Keegan has developed a pedo-stache thanks to his fear of razors and shavers. He claims that he "likes his mustache and beard" when in reality, you're not gonna get any pussy with that much facial hair. '''Learn to fucking shave!'''
 
*'''Soft/Quiet Rooms''' - Whenever Keegan starts chimping out at his shitty school, he would be promptly tard wrangled by the strongest teachers or staff members in the faculty and then hauled into a soft room where he is free to cry like a little baby. This has led to him developing severe [[LOL|PTSD]] in these rooms and thus has become extremely paranoid to not sperg out in public so he won't get sent there again. [[Truth|So far, Keegan has failed miserably.]]
 
*'''The Mr. Men Show''' - A childish [[United Kingdom|Bri'ish]]-[[United States|'Murican]] cartoon that some of Keegan's enemies such as WaRnEr and Kylie have taken a liking to. It was enough for Keegan to get [[PTSD]] from it, to the point where he actually ruined the Little Miss Sunshine plush Kylie gave him over a year ago.
 
*'''[[Magic|The Owl House]]''' - Basically a generic-as-fuck [[gay]] [[Harry Potter]] that some of Keegan's enemies such as Gemaconda and Garrett have taken a liking to, and apparently it was enough for Keegan to get [[PTSD]] from it, even though it's most likely his terminal [[autism]].
 
*'''[[Madoka Magica]]''' - Another magical girl anime with a lonely dumbfuck name Madoka who's super gay for Homura, as well as having Mami Tomoe with big titties, and Morning Rescue. Keegan took a liking to it cause of his ex-girlfriend and a former friend of his for the clout and when both dumped him, he started hating it to death.
 
== Keegan's Shitty Shows and Movies ==
Sometime in about [[2014]], Keegan started making his own [[Garbage|shows, and movies]], he gives [[Geoshea]]'s own media and [[Chris-Chan]]'s Sonichu and CWCVille comics a run out of their money for his content. Prior to the ones listed below, Keegan planned shows that never happened which had nothing but intros, outros, and closing credits, many of which were [[Greeny Phatom]]-like.
 
===iDog and [[Furby]]===
When Keegan was just a bumbling young [[faggot]] in [[2014]], he wanted to create a TV show. What was it about? [[Autism|A Furby and an iDog living together in their house.]] He never made a single episode of it, [[LOL|because his Daddy believed the house was too dirty.]]
 
Instead, all there was is a shitty intro, credits, and gay-ass [[Closing Logos Wiki|closing logos]], which ended up much like [[Greeny Phatom|The Cowabunga Brothers]]' closing logos especially with a fuck ton of real-life companies that [[LOL|didn't even work on it]].
 
===Keegan's Film of Funny and Awesome===
With IDog and Furby having never been made, [[DO IT FAGGOT|what's a sperg like Keegan to do?]] In [[2016]], he created a [[Greeny Phatom]] ripoff where an [[INTERNET HATE MACHINE]] goes to steal a [[DeviantArt|Danny Phantom]] action figure and his group of self-inserted [[morons]] has to stop him or some other retarded shit like that and has managed to [[Jesus Fucking Christ|beat up a teacher]] just so his [[autism]] can be completed. It has been a subject of [[lulz]] between a group of people for a while. Currently, he claims it [[Retarded|"jeopardized his mental health"]], the exact same claim Kylie used in one of her ventings fits about how much she [[Bullshit|"regrets"]] making Bubble vs. Boohbah, another shitty [[Vyond]] series made around a similar time period as this movie of absolute pure faggotry.
 
===Spinners Entertainment===
Later in [[2017]] (or so to believe), he created an [[autistic]] entertainment company where he can show off his [[Spergin|spergery]] to the world. It, unfortunately, has nothing to do with [[Meatspin]], but however, he has a show involving [[fidget spinners]] in it. The shows he created for it include:
*<b>Quick Domino Obstacle</b> - Exactly what it is. A series of [[retarded]] domino tricks with the help of a [[The Big Bang Theory|canned audience]] and his real-life [[Slaves|friends]]. Legend says he also used it to exploit the death of Kylie's mother, as seen on the "live" special. Keegan has claimed before it was meant to be "the [[Family Guy]] to The Section Domino's [[The Simpsons|Simpsons]]", which is also a series of domino tricks with a canned audience created by fellow [[Aussie]] cunt '''TEP Productions/Nc3 Studios ([[Powerword]]: Noah Gunter)''', only except it came before this shitshow, therefore making it a complete ripoff of Noah's work. However, as evident by the soundtrack in some more recent The Section Domino [[No|"episodes"]], Noah surprisingly endorsed it and even made playlists for all the Spinners Entertainment series. However, he later deleted the playlists, likely because [[LOL|he found out about the incident between Keegan and Kylie]].
 
*<b>[[Meatspin|Spinners]]</b> - Basically just Keegan playing with [[fidget spinners]] and [[Schizo|pretending they're people]]. He even got a [[prostitute|freelancer]] from a relatively obscure site to be in an episode once. Not much to write about. Keegan claims it was [[Ripoff|inspired by]] the [[Autism|Marbles]] "franchise", created by '''JacHarv ([[Powerword]]: Jacob Harvey)''', who is a 19-year-old [[United Kingdom|Bri'ish]] [[manchild]] that still plays with toys today, and is also a logo sperg.
 
*<b>The Amazing Marble Race</b> - Just real-life Algodoo which rips off some aspects from [[Total Drama Island]]. Hosted by the [[spergin]]' faggot himself.
 
*<b>Welcome To Logo City</b> - Just Keegan acting out with plushies in front of a TV like a [[manchild]], with a videotape playing in the background. Keegan claims it was [[Ripoff|inspired]] by "Not A VHS Opening You'd Expect", which is a web series by '''Taylor Enterprises''', another logo sperg and [[manchild]] who also makes videos that have a similar aspect to the videos of davemadson.
 
*<b>[[Saw|Marker or Pen]]</b> - The [[Vibrator|Kinder Joy Robot Toy]] brings one contestant over, and their job is to identify which [[dildo]] in the cup is actually a marker or a [[pen]]. [[Boring|Yawn.]]
 
*<b>[[Unoriginal|WTTW Chicago Logo Bloopers]]</b> - Basic logo bloopers spergery, with Keegan's massive raging hard-on for the Sushi Pack mixed in. Not much to write about other than the fact it's just another unimportant davemadson-style [[shit|series]].
 
Currently [[baleeted]], but you can catch Quick Domino Obstacle and Spinners on his [[archive.org|Internet Archive]] account.
 
== Failed [[An Hero]]: what will he do next? ==
[[File:KeegansShittyEssay.png|center]]
[[File:PEDOKEEGAN.png|thumb|left|Woah there, [[faggot|buddy]]! [[Yes|Isn't 17 a bit too young?]]]]
[[File:Keegan dance.gif|thumb|[[PARTY HARD]]]]
On September 22, 2021, Keegan would decide to "out" himself when he revealed that he sexually abused Kylie
, his (now) ex-girlfriend. At this very moment, everything that Keega[[nigger]] has worked his whole life for, many of the sperg circles he was in, and followers all turned on him on that very day. Keegan's old life and glory days were nothing but a distant memory as sexual abuse is considered [[Truth|unforgivable]] and Keegan having preached against that [[shit]] countless times, obviously would have that shit blow up in his greasy face. Keegan's only defender at that time was his [[retarded]] [[mother]], who decided to defend him by calling the rage against him "cancel culture", when really it was just a [[liberal]] [[SJW]] using progressiveness as a shield for his sexual antics having the crowd he cultivated blow up in his face. Reap what you sow, fucking [[faggot]], or just become [[an hero]].
 
Tons of new shit was later revealed about Keegan, such as him [[Pedo|thinking that it's fine for minors to be put in suggestive situations, being nude or wearing skimpy clothes]], the fact that he likes hurling his fat fists at his parents and calling them [[niggers]]. Keegan claims that a lot of the things he's said in the past (such as the age chart) were copied off of things Kylie and her friends have said but with slight alterations. However, that should not be used to cover up all the other lulzy things he's done. A crapton of screenshots were leaked and Keegan only began tumbling down in a downward spiral. Soon enough, plenty of videos were later made of this autistic buffoon featuring his untimely spergery in all its glory. It has also been revealed that he tried to pressure Ky into performing lewd acts while her 4-year-old brother was still home, yet said that his [[Schizo|made-up daughter "Angela"]] shouldn't be in Kylie's custody or [[Hypocrite|whatever the fuck due to seeing her masturbate.]] Afterward, he and Mommadomma decided to make fun of her mother's death by saying she fed her too many [[Shit|discos]] which of course would backfire hard on him. When called out, Keegan just shifted the blame on Domma and kept saying he [[Bullshit|"changed" and that he was "taking accountability"]].
 
While Keegan is going through a crisis, he attempted to get a job, even so, this fag tried to get a manager position at Raising Cane’s in his area, only for them to [[LOL|not accept him in at all]]. He eventually got a job at a local Mariano's, bagging people's groceries (GROSS!), let's see how long that lasts, oh also, tell the manager at Mariano's we said hi!
 
Keegan decided to "retire" from YouTube only to come back two weeks later, which resulted in him doing the same shit 3 days later. This has been a recurring thing where Keegan wastes everyone’s fucking time. On the bright side, one can finally know why [[abortion]] exists in the first place. Keegan then later made shittily-made cow shit callouts on more of his enemies, calling them some kind of Garrett Cult while making a Cult of his own consisting of assorted fucktards. After several autistic slap fights, Keegan decided to finally retire. He later [[delete fucking everything|deleted all the accounts he still had access to]] and left the ones that are unable to be deleted as dormant, only to come back yet again on YouTube and Twitter after months. He appears to have turned to [[Filthy Frank|satirical comedy]] and has announced the start of a new project, with only 1 video so far. He is also still making YTPMVs that are half-assed, sometimes "mod replaced" and also have too many processing filters on them, yet the YTPMV community wouldn’t even allow him back as he’s just gonna pull the same shit over and over after being exposed. Unlike other YTPMVers like Nex_, Milly, NuzalMan, and [[CyansWorldCartoon]] who left the internet after being exposed to being pedos or rapists, Keegan will not fuck off from the internet and continues to waste everyone’s time. To this day, he is still on the internet.
 
== Discovering his page ==
[[File:Proof of Identity.jpg|thumb|He even gave [[Amanda Todd|somebody]] this [[fugly|beautiful]] photo of himself to prove that he's on ED]]
Shortly after this article was created by Raiden, Keegan discovered his article, and it didn't take long for his [[white knights]] began to start vandalizing it. In December 2021, Keegan created a [[TikTok|ShitTok]] of him going full PERMABAN over his article being updated. On February 13, 2022, at approximately 13:50 AM, Keegan created an Encyclopedia Dramatica account called "[[User:LolcowWithAnEDAccount|LolcowWithAnEDAccount]]", which he used to fuck up his article by adding [[lie|false information on his enemies]] and [[delete fucking everything|deleting fucking everything]], Keegan couldn't redeem himself until his edits getting reverted, and his account getting [[permabanned]].
 
One month later, it was shown that Keegan created the (now-baleeted) ED article on Kylie (which was [[copypasta|plagiarized]] from this very article), using another ED account called "[[User:Lebasedfaggot|Lebasedfaggot]]". With his permaban anger issues, he used this article to doxx her and add false information about her.
 
[[File:KeeganMadAtEDArticleBeingUpdated.mp4|center|350px]]
 
==Keegan the “Entrepreneur”==
It was revealed on April 1, 2022, that Keegan has decided to become a so-called “entrepreneur” in his new YouTube channel, called “Crystal Lake Entrepreneur” (Crystal Lake Video Maker), when the fact that he can’t read a fucking book to learn how to invest into stocks, and building a business, it’s another way to ruin his fucking life and then harasses Kylie and Midori even more. It also happens to be funny that no one supports Keegan’s decision of becoming an entrepreneur. Since his special needs ass is in a special needs class, '''HE CAN’T EVEN FUCKING READ'''. Don’t expect him to become famous, he’s fucked up BIG TIME.
 
{{center|<youtube>GOMrLW_SR68</youtube>}}
 
His only intention to become a fucking [[faggot|entrepreneur]] is to try and get forgiveness after being exiled from every community he was on. Oh, he sold the Kani plush, let’s see him spend more money on girls like a fucking simp would do and pull another incident like this in another community. It didn’t even last long for him to give up his entrepreneurial days and then claim to become rich one day by selling shit on [[eBay]]. He recently moved back to his main account after the fact that the account failed. Who else knows what he’ll do next?
 
==Giving up==
June 20, 2022 - The day when [[Hazbin Hotel|Keeganie Morningstar]] shat out a video saying that he will be [[dying alone|retiring from all of his social media]], except for [[Snapchat]] and [[Discord]]. He probably might be faking this to get sympathy for his fucked up shit from the [[2021|Kylie]] to the [[2022|Chloe eras]], and if he does retire, then pat yourself on the fucking back, we won't be hearing from this dipshit anymore.
 
{{center|[[File:Announcing my retirement (For real this time) (I'm not f**king kidding).webm|640x360px]]<br><b>Note: This video has audio and contains poor quality, but because Keegan is [[retarded]], you might have to turn your volume all the way up to hear a thing.</b>}}
 
===HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS===
Keegan the Hutt officially returned on his shart stain of a JewTube channel as "Z 3 U S" on July 15th, 2022. This is not surprising in any way, since Keegan is notorious for being a nasty lying pedophilic Aspergic lardass who always [[BAWWW]]s about [[attention whore|"quitting 4EVAH!!1"]] and always comes back. Among the first things he did was pass a turd of a video called "PSA". The video's description reeks of his well-known tard rage and Keegalizo Buckzo then spergs Domma, and XenoParadox, and has [[lol|even threatened to report this page to his school]].
{{center|[[File:PSA.webm|640x360px]]}}
{{squote|[[Irony|You people are literally fucking braindead]], especially if you're coming from the Vyond community. You've been told MULTIPLE TIMES that my ex wants nothing to do with this goofy ahh drama and yet YOU STILL CONTRIBUTE TO IT.
 
I'm not trying to directly call out anyone from the Hellhole here, as most of the photos seen are just examples of the kind of shit I had to sit through. Matter of fact, not a single one of them has bothered with it for months. If anything, it's those fucking bastards like Domma, [[User:Nicholas05|Nicholas05]] and XenoParadox that are still on about this shit.
 
The Speakonia shit is just a hobby. I'm not all that interested in the community, especially since there are some very unpleasant faces in the community itself.
 
Hopefully this video helps somehow.
 
By the way, once school starts back up [[Taking Down ED|I will report that ED article to the school's resource officer]], like my social worker has suggested.
 
You kids are literally fucking pathetic. Go to hell.|The video's description. Also good luck, pal.}}
 
===Hacked and permabanned===
[[File:Keeganniggerfaggothacked.jpg|thumb|left|200px|He then realized that his account got permabanned after NFT [[Jews|scammers]] [[HA HA HA, OH WOW|took over his main account.]]]]
[[File:Keegan scam replies.png|thumb|Kikes try to [[YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG|take advantage]] of the situation.]]
 
On July 24, 2022, a [[NFT]] [[scam]] by the name of [[Cryptocurrency|Ark Invest]] [[hacked]] into his main channel, causing it to get [[Banned|suspended]]; as a result, the over 60% of condensed [[AIDS]] and [[assburgers]] on JewTube was [[and nothing of value was lost|baleeted along with the channel]]. Upon discovering this, Don-Keegan Kong had a [[Chimpout|chimp-out]] about it and demanded to JewTube that his account gets restored. Also, as expected, he created a new account just to ban evade and posted a video where he explains what happened and states that he is trying to get his old channel back ([[fat]] chance).
 
{{center|[[File:My account got hacked by a scam and suspended.mp4|220px]]}}
 
July 28, 2022, would be the day that he would post yet another retirement video.
{{fv|RetirementVids|background-color: #FFFFFF;|font-weight: bold;
|[[File:It's time to talk..webm|175x360px]]
|[[File:UPDATE - On break, rather than retirement.webm|540x360px]]
}}
 
As of now, he is still on YouTube under [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCj6X_51kvbvnC83Ey_LoG3A ~Maestro Keegan~] until he got permabanned again.
 
{{clear}}
 
==Involvement in the sugar parent community==
[[File:KeeganThePedo.jpg|thumb|180px|Note the "She's only younger by 1 year" and Keegan's [[pedo|need to explain his choice of age out of insecurity]].]]
After his "retirement", he lurked in multiple BDSM/DDLG and sugar parent-related servers typically found on the website DISBOARD.org. His behavior in the BDSM/DDLG servers has been typically described as someone trying to look for a submissive female within his age range, while in the sugar parent servers he is trying to make sales off of [[Bullshit|"SFW"]] content he creates himself, mostly thigh, ass, and shirtless pics, alongside shitty Kisekae or Gacha commissions. He was previously in a controversy in the sugaring community after it was discovered he was selling other people's nudes which he found through various MEGA links sent by a 3rd party, but now he is selling his content. This goes to show that Keegan has gone from an internet celebrity who used to be widely respected, to a fatherless damaged e-boy prostitute.
 
Just recently, this fat fuck was found in the DISBOARD.org server called "Lustiverse Sanctuary", where he was later banned [[typical|due to usage of a minor character in ERP and sexualization of minor characters as well]], in a similar fashion to that of Lamont Meeks and [[Geoshea|Gabriel Garcia]].
 
{{clear}}
 
== Quotes ==
<center>
{{frame|{{morphquote|mqtest3|background-color:#ffffff; width: 700px; height: 750px;|font-weight: bold;
 
|For the last time, I am not an abuser. I only abused one person, and I'm not proud of that.
|[[FAIL|Contradicted himself in just one sentence.]]
 
|One day I was off my meds and I acted up, but that was not an excuse. The remark I made about her deceased mother was totally my fault, and I'm sorry for that. To tell the truth, I was kinda peer-pressured by someone into making that remark, but that's not an excuse. I still did the crime and I already paid the price for it.
|Keegan is damage-controlling like a little bitch.
 
|I'm too scared another horrifying identity crisis and meltdown might happen while I'm gone and I won't be able to handle it
|Keegan is too scared of needles and da "woke vax" despite being a self-proclaimed "Progressive Liberal Leftist SJW", but is also worried that Kylie might have another one of her [[tard rage|meltdowns]] or [[Dying alone|identity crises]] while he is gone.
 
|GUESS WHAT MOM?! THE ROAD TRIP GOT CALLED OFF BECAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENED! I DON'T NEED A RETARDED-ASS VACCINE!!!
|Keegan's response to his momma is shown here: "You'll get the shot or you won't be able to see Ky"
 
|I've been compared to people like Lewmio and Chris-Chan and honestly it fucking hurts. I can't even do my own things in peace without being reminded of all the horrible things I've done.
|Keegan whining like a pussy.
 
|BE QUIET MOM I'M MAKING A VIDEO FOR PLAYING ANGRY BIRDS FOR GOOGLE CHROME JESUS CHRIST!
|One of Keegan’s famous quotes that shames him forever.
 
|I'M SICK AND FUCKING TIRED OF BEING THE COMMUNITY'S FUCKTOY!!!
|Keegan's [[tard rage]].
 
|KYLIE, THIS IS KEEGAN!!! GET YOUR ASS BACK ON DISCORD RIGHT FUCKING NOW! YOU'RE ON SO MUCH THIN ICE!!!!!
|Keegan is infuriated that Kylie doesn't want to deal with his shit.
 
|Kylie, this is your final fucking warning! If you don't get on Discord right now and apologize for the shit you said to me, I'm calling dad! Got it?!
|More of Keegan's [[tard rage]]. Also sourced from another [[tard rage]] voice message.
 
|He's made me into a fucked up person, and I don't want anybody else to suffer the same fate I did. He's a shitty influence.
|Keegan complaining about Mommadomma. See a pattern?
 
|I know I'm mentally ill, but it doesn't excuse what I did.
|Keegan always [[Attention Whore|wanting sympathy]] after he fucks up. How sad.
 
|YOU, WILL, GET, PERMABANNED!!!!!
|Keegan's most (in)famous quote.
 
|FUCK THE TROLLS, FUCK THE TROLLS!!!!!!!!!!
|Keegan screaming.
 
|While I’m a guy that wants to be wealthy, the Entrepreneur aesthetic didn’t seem fitting to me, so I just went with a generic video-maker-type aesthetic. But who knows, maybe I’ll become wealthy someday with all these eBay sales and Fiverr gigs I’m doing.
|Keegan already flushing his “dream” down the drain and then trying to be rich by doing his usual bullshit.
 
| To be fair I was egged on by someone into making that remark but that's not an excuse. It pissed her off too but she's over it. I already said it once and I'll say it again: she didn't wish for any of the harassment against me. I'm not that kind of guy anymore.
|Keegan wants more sympathy after the YTPMV community threatened him.
 
| Yeah, Midori wrote that. He disowned everything relating to me, and a lot of the stuff on this doc (aside from the abuse, which I have already taken full accountability for) is heavily unreliable or out of context.
|Keegan here in this quote trying to say that Midori is full of bullshit.
 
|I ended up having to take down the "Roasting [[user:Nicholas05|Nicholas05]]" video because someone ([[HA HA HA, OH WOW|likely Prickolas himself]]) submitted a false privacy complaint on the video, even though the photo shown was already a public record and technically was not doxxing.
 
I am unable to mirror this video anywhere else because he'll likely abuse the privacy complaint form on those sites too.
 
I'm just gonna say it now; [[Lie|the dude's a lost cause. He keeps engaging in harassment against me OTI, accusing me of stalking]] (when in reality i was just trying to make things right, but you ultimately refused to hear it), made fun of Oscar Ferguson/Zender Man who outside of raging a lot has never done anything to warrant said harassment (and also made fun of his dead mom, that's fucking sick and cruel) and keeps doing edits of people faceswapped with [[George Floyd]], often making "I can't breathe" jokes with the sole intention of making fun of George Floyd's death. He even supports [[Black Lives Matter|All Lives Matter]], which is a racist way to put it and completely disregards the oppression and racism that the African American community has to endure on a day-to-day regular basis.
 
So yeah, that's all I have to say. Nick, just because [[Susan Wojcicki]] managed to suck you off just this once doesn't mean you'll be able to get away with everything anymore. You are a lost cause at this point. [[Low Tier God|You serve zero purpose. You should get off the internet...NOW!]]
|Keeganie Magne's autistic meltdown on Nicholas for taking down the video that doxxes him (The one that his face used in the [[Fun Shitposting Wiki]] article).
 
|border=#ffffff|background=#ffffff}}}}
</center>
<br>
 
== Gallery ==
This gallery below is an artisan archive preserving the finest ragequits, permabannings, Angry Birds for Google Chrome, and waifu whacking off that Keegdoggis here has decided to show the world too. Enjoy faggots!
 
{{cg|'''Sheer, Unfiltered Autism'''|aspiegallery|center|<gallery perrow="6">
File:KeegansBed.jpg|Abandon all hope, all ye who enter here.
File:Emo Keegan.png|[[Linkin park|I TRIED SO HARD AND GOT SO FAR]] (Yes, he actually made this "art" of himself.)
File:KeeganSelfHarmLMFAO.png|[[LMFAO|He sliced it as Kylie.]]
File:YellowKeegan.png|SUPER PISS SMASHER
File:KeeganWithRetard.png|2 creepy retards. It's possible the one on the left could be his woke dad.
File:Keegan Piano.png|Keegan reenacting Schroeder, the sperg character from [[Peanuts]].
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="6">
File:Keeganrages.png|Keegan tard-raging after a comment he deserves.
File:Keeganvsnancer.png|Based Nancer.
File:KeeganDoxxedAMinor.jpeg|Indeed, Keegan would love to harass minors online by leaking their info.
File:Keegan Depressed.png|[[Crybaby]].
File:KeeganSobbingBaby.png|More of his pathetic bitchfits.
File:KeeganWithThot.png|Keegan hanging out with some [[fat]] [[thot]], definitely Chloe.
File:Keeganmeltdown.png|The storm after the storm.
File:KeeganSelfHarming.png|More self-harm edgy gore shit.
File:FedoraKeegan.png|Keegan wearing a [[Fedora]] [[Neckbeard]]-style.
File:KeeganTardRaging.png|Keegan is extra mad.
File:SoyjackKeegan1.png|Like [[Anthony Fantano]], Keegan is a living wojak.
File:KeeganDisabled.png|Some disabilities look like this.
File:KeeganDeflecting.png|Keegan in a fit of [[autism]].
File:KeeganGetsUpset.png|Cancelling backfired on this soyboy [[SJW]].
File:SoyjackKeegan2.png|Even more, disgusting soy.
File:KeeganTheMegaTard.png|One of his lulziest meltdowns.
File:KeeganStarfire.png|Keegan lusting over Starfire.
File:KeeganCopesSoHard.png|Keegan The Autist like the sperg he is, is unable to handle and face the consequences.
File:KeeganGetsSexLubricant.png|From when a ween sent lube to his house.
File:KeeganBlocked.png|His raging hateboner for Garrett's Meming Crew really shows here. Note how he put his personal info in the blocked words section to avoid getting doxxed, which has already happened.
File:KeegansCover.png|His embarrassing binder cover for a class. He did a shitty job censoring the Central Tiger symbol for Discord.
File:KeeganVSVHSFan.png|Based VHSFan.
File:KeegansShittyCover.mp3|A shitty cover of a love song by [[Elvis Presley]] that Keegan and one of his school's music teachers initially made to impress his now-ex Kylie.
File:KeeganIsaacThreat.png|Keegan threatening to bring in an enemy of the group.
File:KeeganZeusStalker.png|He stalks you if you cut ties with him or participate in his article.
File:fatfuckkeeganjewosco.jpg|[[Randy Stair]]'s long lost son got his job at Weis' new brother-in-law before his crab waifu forced him to kill them like his father's ghost waifu.
File:Keeganflopdoxxednicholas.png|Solidified proof of Keegan doxxing his enemies. (as mentioned in the ninth one)
</gallery>}}
 
=== Fan Art ===
People have also decided to create some art of Keegan, especially after he got exposed. Here are they in all their glory!
{{cg|'''Art and Memes'''|aspiefanart|center|<gallery perrow="6">
File:KeeganNeckbeard.png|Keegan in a few years' time.
File:Bald Keegan.png|Keegan decides to cosplay [[Caillou]] after shaving his hair.
File:Keegan as Angry Dad.png|[[The Simpsons|KYLIE FETCH ME THE BEER!!!]]
File:Keegilou1.png|Part One...
File:Keegilou2.png|... and Part Two.
File:Kani kicking Keegan's ass.png|The thing every Keegan-ween wishes would happen to him.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="6">
File:KeeganLockdown.png|Keegan making Ky's Danger Zone, Keegan's [[Drama]] Zone.
File:Keegan Caillou.png|Keegan REEEEEs.
File:WrangledKeegan.png|Depiction of the tard wranglers restraining Keegan.
File:Keegan Shower Meme.png|Accurate thoughts.
File:KeeganXDrewPickles.png|Bag, that was swell.
File:KeeganGassed.png|He deserves to burn in the ovens.
File:KeeganOnAPlane.png|[[Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17]]
File:KeeganCondomFail.png|Seems very accurate.
File:KeegansRoom.png|PTPrime! Will! Get! '''Permabanned!'''
File:KeeganAndIsaac.png|[[True]].
File:KeeganClown.png|What a fucking [[clown]].
File:When dad calls m-.png|Dad WILL be called.
File:Keegsinthehat.png|Keegan after he was born in the [[hospital]].
File:Keegan Floyd.png|[[George Floyd|He can't permabreathe!]]
File:KeeganDating.png|[[You|Who wouldn’t say no to that face?]]
File:Keluge.png|Ladies and gentlemen, a new emotion that comes to Keeganigga!!!
File:Keegocado Avocado.png|[[Nikocado Avocado|It's Your Permafault!?!?!?!?!?!!!]]
File:Lolcow Hotel.png|[[Hazbin Hotel|Trashbin Hoe-yell]]
</gallery>}}
 
== Videos ==
As with the gallery, here are some parody videos of Keegan or the fat autist being the joke himself.
 
{| style="margin: 0 auto"
|{{frame|{{videoframe|RYTP|background-color: #DBD8CD;|font-weight: bold;
|[[File:KeeganApology.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center> '''Keegan's half-assed [[Logan Paul]]-styled apology. He even admitted to grabbing Jack/Tom Cat's IP address, lmao.''' </center>
|[[File:Keegan vs trolls.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center> '''[[Lol|Now this is fucking hilarious.]]''' </center>
|<youtube>yCaoZNBUVdY</youtube> <br> <center>'''More Keegan Quotes.'''</center>
|<youtube>6lch14PNvFQ</youtube> <br> <center>'''[[DO IT FAGGOT]]'''</center>
|<youtube>YgJpPn5XmxM</youtube> <br> <center>'''[[Autistic Screeching]]. Probably a soon-to-be [[Friday Night Funkin]] mod as well.'''</center>
|<youtube>IPmstihuGfQ</youtube> <br> <center>'''Another tribute.'''</center>
|<youtube>zBWBx7ELnH4</youtube> <br> <center>'''Keegan is evolving to his final form! Watch out!'''</center>
|<youtube>emJlA49sxq4</youtube> <br> <center> '''Keegan goes full [[Justin Bieber]].'''</center>
|<youtube>zRuQ8zftKgM</youtube> <br> <center> '''Ballad of Keegan The Autist.'''</center>
}}|border=#000000|background=#FFFFFF}}
|}
 
{| style="margin: 0 auto"
|{{frame|{{videoframe|RYTP2|background-color: #DBD8CD;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>_ZH0HYf9GHk</youtube> <br> <center> '''A meme edit of one of Keegan's latest [[TikTok]]s.'''</center>
|<youtube>w4-OnyEKIwo</youtube> <br> <center> '''Another meme edit of one of Keegan's latest [[TikTok]]s, this time with different audio.'''</center>
|[[File:Keegan's tard rage.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center> '''Here is the original video of Keegan raging on camera threatening to permaban people. Go nuts.''' </center>
}}|border=#000000|background=#FFFFFF}}
|}
 
=== Other Videos ===
{| style="margin: 0 auto"
|{{frame|{{videoframe|RYTP|background-color: #DBD8CD;|font-weight: bold;
|[[File:Keegan Getting Fucked.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center> '''Keegan after he drops the soap in prison.'''</center>
|[[File:KeeganRuiningSunshineP1.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center>'''Keegan on [[TikTok]] brutally beating the shit out of the Little Miss Sunshine plush Kylie got him once. Honestly surprised he never did this to Kylie herself.'''</center>
|[[File:KeeganRuiningSunshineP2.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center>'''Keegan "ruining" the Little Miss Sunshine plush by drawing and spitting on it. That spit looks like it has the consistency of [[cum]].'''</center>
|[[File:KeeganBeatingKani.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center>'''More [[TikTok]] spergery from Keegan, this time he's beating up the plush doll of his self-proclaimed "ex-waifu". Who would have guessed he'd do this to her too?'''</center>
|[[File:KeegansTrackdown.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center> '''Keegan wanting to get people arrested over milking and trolling him. Seriously, that's fucking pathetic.''' </center>
|[[File:KeeganHatesHisEx.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center> '''Keegan expressing his flaming hateboner for his ex Kylie, through this duet on TikTok. The footage on the left ended up getting memed to death by some of Keegan's enemies, replacing the audio with something else.''' </center>
|[[File:KeeganVideo.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center>'''Keegan being a retarded shit as usual. This was meant to be a failed attempt at copying Verbalase's infamous Tetris Beatbox video.'''</center>
|[[File:KeeganAndCripple.mp4|560x315px]] <br> <center>'''Keegan and another SPED friend of his. Fun fact, that guy also has the name, Ben, just like one of Keegan's sex slaves!'''</center>
}}|border=#000000|background=#FFFFFF}}
|}


== Trivia ==
== Trivia ==
* Keegan's bent [[Penis|duck]] is only 3 inches long.
[[File:Pube Salmon.png|thumb|His final evolution. [[Emo|Fuck off and let him be]] [[plz]].]]
* Keegan looks like [[Chris-Chan]] and [[03bgood|Blake Good]].
* Keegan likes fantasizing about his enemies dying brutal deaths, though it won't happen in a million years.
* Like every [[manchild]] he is, he still enjoys watching [[Vyond|GoAnimate]] videos and making shitty jokes.
* Keegan enjoys making fun of people's deaths, but then backtracks exactly 5 minutes later afterward like the coward he is.
* If Keegan doesn't have moderator roles, he'll be unable to PERMABAN and thus will have a mental breakdown.
* Keegan says he's just exactly like people of color when he's just a white cracker with a girl's hair.
* Keegan pulled a Chris Chan and attempted to get this page taken down 4 times. He even got his [[Ass Burgers]] retard friends and school to try to take it down. Tell the IT guy at Keegan's school that we said hi!
* He was once the main developer of a [[Ass Burgers|BAWWTISTIC]] version of [[Vyond]] called Wrapper Offline (which mainly brings back the old Family Guy theme called Comedy World) and had coding skills on the same level as [[YandereDev]], meaning this retarded rip-off of [[Vyond]] would always crash because this retard would [[dying alone|blame his meltdowns and mental issues]].
* The characters Keegan sees himself as consist of the retarded salmon from [[Shit|Sushi Pack]], Ikura Maki; Max from Sam and Max as well as more, usually to ship himself with the tomboy girl of the show he finds sexy.
* He once claimed to have [[Bipolar disorder|bi-shitter disorder]], but we all know [[Twitter|he's faking it for brownie points]] like his [[emo]] Wicca loving Snorlax-lookin' mama.
* A former ween and friend of DLE, named [[Powerword|Devon Lawler]], cracked a joke about [[Harvey Weinstein]] towards him on one of Devon's [[furry|gay ass streams]]. Though Devon was a 16-year-old lolcow and troll, he foreshadowed Keegan's behavior later on.
* Keegan and Ben got caught by bus security for reciting that Vaporeon copypasta and he said "THIS IS HIGH SCHOOL, KIDS TALK ABOUT INAPPROPRIATE STUFF ALL THE TIME".
* Keegan was once banned from YouChew for being under 13.
* At one point, [https://twitter.com/Karrie1313/status/1502066129216360453 Karrie wanted to sell this enby retard on craigslist,] which could mean she is fed up with his shit.
* It was once noted that Keegan compared Kylie to Midori, which could mean that Keegan almost could've done the same things to him as Kylie did.
* It can be inferred that his favorite color is orange cause he’s always wearing that stank-ass orange shirt in most of his content. '''WASH YOUR FUCKING CLOTHES, YOU JACKASS!!!'''
* Keegan was once suspended from school in 2015 for punching a teacher in the face because she didn’t want her to play on the iPad. This could have led to his Angry Birds for Google Chrome and permaban anger issues today.


== See Also ==
== See Also ==
* [[Chris-Chan]]
[[File:Kani Maki.png|thumb|Keegan's waifu getting crabforked.]]
* [[Incel]]
* ''[[Angry Birds]]'' - The game he played when telling his mother to [[STFU|be quiet]].
* [[Rape]]
* [[Autism]] - Yes, this abuser has assburgers syndrome.
* [[BPD]] - This proves to us that he and his [[emo]] mama secretly have attention whore contests in the Salisbury household. He's also the product of [[Zoomer|TikTok faking disorders and trauma culture]].
* [[Caillou]] - The cartoon version of Keegan
* [[Camhead]] - Similar to Keegan except Cam had common sense and left the internet.
* [[Chris-Chan]] - The person he secretly idolizes and looks like him too. Also did similar things to what Chris Chan did as well. Basically, the YTPMV community's Chris Chan.
* [[CyansWorldCartoon]] - Malaysian who acts the same as him, minus the pedo stuff. At least he fucked off, unlike Keegan.
* [[Depression]] - The tool that Keegan uses to gain sympathy and attention.
* [[Diogo Mendes]] - Possible idol?
* [[Dying Alone]]
* [[EDP445]] - Black Keegan
* [[Erik "Tazman" Mokracek]] - His mentally challenged middle-aged long-lost cousin.
* [[Geoshea]] [[Jew|✡]] - Keegan claims to hate him, yet behaves like him. At least Geoshea had some common sense and left the Internet, unlike Keeganigger.
* [[Glitchlov]] - another schizo that acted like him.
* [[Greeny Phatom]] - Keegan has done Greeny Phatom-related stuff especially before.
* [[Harvey Weinstein]] [[Jew|✡]] - Like father, like son. If he wants to be a filmmaker, this could accurately be like him all grown up.
* [[HeyItsBowman]] - Pinoy-Canuck manchild who groomed a minor in 2018, Keegan also tried to go full skiddie mode and decided to grab his IP, but failed miserably.
* [[Incel]] - As expected of these Redditor snowflake [[politically correct]] [[Gen Z|Gen-Z TikTok libtards]].
* [[Joey The Autist]] - Long lost brother?
* [[JustinRPG]] - Both are known [[piss|urophiles]].
* [[MediaFan2008]] - A person who acts the same just like him but on a worse scale.
* [[Nikocado Avocado]] - The person who makes his content look good.
* [[Pansexual]] - Ironically, for someone who loves all genders, he seemed to never find a boyfriend or another enby [[Pedo]]-fork.
* [[Pedo]] - It's very possible that Keegan could be one.
* [[Rape]] - One thing Keegan would’ve done to Kylie and Chloe if the road trip wasn’t canceled.
* ''[[Teen Titans]]'' - The show he used to fap to.
* ''[[The Powerpuff Girls]]'' - One of the shows he faps to.
* [[Timbox]] - A challenger approaches!
* [[Vyond]] - The retarded dumbfuck first started in this, yet the community wouldn’t even let him back in!
* [[YouTube Poop]] - Keegan made some in the past, yet like the Vyond community, the community won’t let him in again.
* [[YTPMV]] - The stupid shit Keegan makes yet just like both communities, the community won't accept him in again.


==External Links==
==External Links==
*YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Keegdog
*{{kf|17299|YouTube Poop World & YouChew - Came into existence as a shitty 4chan-wannabe knockoff; Left this world a shitty ResetEra-wannabe knockoff}}
*Discord: Keegdog#3771
*{{yt|c|UCj6X_51kvbvnC83Ey_LoG3A|JewTube}} '''(PERMABANNED)'''
*Twitter: https://twitter.com/keegdog0
*{{yt|c|UClPccp0tOvGnKZOvVDvclgw|Former JewTube acc}} '''(PERMABANNED)'''
*SoundCloud '''(NOW INACTIVE)''': https://soundcloud.com/notactiveanymore
*{{yt|u|MultiKeegster1|JewTube alt}} '''(INACTIVE)'''
*DeviantART: https://www.deviantart.com/imagenydoeszeart
*{{yt|u|Keegangamings|Long-dead JewTube gaming channel}} '''(INACTIVE)'''
*Steam: https://steamcommunity.com/id/keegdog0
*{{yt|u|YTPMakerPlaysAGame|Another Long-dead JewTube gaming channel}} '''(INACTIVE)'''
*{{yt|c|UC8GqWN0sGup5KIvVpTn2_4w|Pointless JewTube Alt}} '''(INACTIVE)'''
*{{yt|c|UChOWl7bf0ZLBPTV-kXfqyTA|New JewTube}} '''(INACTIVE)'''
*{{yt|c|UC3zpKR6YVMpA5QshRIJkkEw|New JewTube alt}} '''(INACTIVE)'''
*{{yt|c|UCx6XPDhLcEjzjkLRp1mu1dQ|Another JewTube Alt}} '''(BALEETED)'''
*{{yt|c|UCbsSCDxd4PZxCTzJYml1oyw|His dad's JewTube}}
*{{yt|u|BlossomUtonium12345|JewTube account for Personal Shit}} '''(INACTIVE)'''
* [https://www.vidlii.com/user/Imageny Abandoned Vidlii account]
*{{twitter|MaestroKeegan|Twitter}}
*{{twitter|ksal04_|Former Twitter Account}} '''(BALEETED)'''
*{{twitter|k33g4n_|New Twitter account}} '''(BALEETED)'''
*{{twitter|z3uswastaken|Another Twitter account}} '''(BALEETED)'''
*{{twitter|JSFilmsLLC|Yet another Twitter account of his}} '''(PERMABANNED)'''
*{{twitter|Karrie1313|His mom's Twitter}}
*{{discord|user|~ Maestro Keegan ~#9343}} Discord tag as of August 2022
*{{Soundcloud|notactiveanymore|SoundCloud}} '''(BALEETED)'''
*{{dauser|ImagenyDoesZeArt|DeviantART}} '''(INACTIVE)'''
*{{Steamid|k33g4n_|Steam}}
*[https://ytpmania.net/t/xomdjl/8733| YTPMania] '''(PERMABANNED)'''
*{{skype|ytpmaker1000}} '''(INACTIVE)'''
*[https://keegdog.carrd.co/ Caard] '''(BALEETED)'''
*[https://ksal.carrd.co/ New Caard] '''(BALEETED)'''
* [https://ytmnd.com/users/KJS12 YTMND]
*[https://scratch.mit.edu/users/KJS12/ First ever Scratch account] '''(PERMABANNED)'''
*[https://scratch.mit.edu/users/KeeganTheYTPMaker/ Another Scratch account of his] '''(PERMABANNED)'''
*[https://scratch.mit.edu/users/AtomicBettyFan2004/ Yet another Scratch account of his] '''(PERMABANNED)'''
*[https://scratch.mit.edu/users/Basketballboy04/ Fourth Scratch account] '''(PERMABANNED)'''
*[https://scratch.mit.edu/users/SourWashingMachine/ Fifth Scratch account] '''(PERMABANNED)'''
*[https://scratch.mit.edu/users/SourWashingRETURN/ Sixth Scratch account] '''(PERMABANNED)'''
*[https://scratch.mit.edu/users/Lmagenii/ Current Scratch account]
*{{Reddituser|DontThinkAboutIt112|Reddit}} '''(BALEETED)'''
*{{KYM|users/imageny|Know Your Meme}}
*[https://ksalisb.newgrounds.com/ Newgrounds] '''(BALEETED)'''
*[https://modarchive.org/index.php?request=view_profile&query=90967 The Mod Archive]
*{{instagram|keegan91504|Former Instagram account #1}}
*{{instagram|k.salisb04|Former Instagram account #2}} '''(HACKED)'''
*{{instagram|keegan.salisb04|Current Instagram account}} '''(PRIVATE)'''
*{{fb|ksalisbury2004|Facebook}} '''(PRIVATE)'''
*{{fb|SteakMan|His dad's Facebook}}
*{{fb|karrie.flannigan.3|His mom's Facebook}}
*[https://archive.org/details/@ksalisb04 Archive of some stuff he made, most notably his retarded toy videos.]
*[https://www.nicovideo.jp/user/78292979 Niconico] '''(INACTIVE)'''
*{{Tumblr|keegan-salisbury|(likely former) Tumblr account}}
*[https://community.fandom.com/wiki/User:PPGRocks1998 Fandom/Wikia] '''(BALEETED)'''
*{{tiktok|kjs60014|TikTok}}
*{{snapchat|ksalisb2004}} Snapchat
*[https://keegansalisbury.wordpress.com/ Wordpress Webpage]
* [https://k33g4n.neocities.org/ Neocites]
* [https://github.com/K33G4N-GH GitHub]
* [https://github.com/KeeganTNTBE Abandoned Github account] '''(INACTIVE)'''
* [https://musescore.com/user/26334791 MuseScore]
* [https://www.last.fm/user/MusicFun4keegan Last.fm] '''(INACTIVE)'''
*'''Email''': [email protected]
*'''Cell Phone''': +1 (815)-307-2509
*'''Cash App''': $ksalisbury04 (Spam request money from him for the lulz)


{{Ytseries}}
{{manchild}}
{{Aspies}}
{{Aspies}}
{{enemy}}
{{Dyingalone}}
{{Dyingalone}}
{{pedoseries}}
{{lolcows}}
{{takedown}}
{{Retarded Edit Wars}}
{{portals|gay|trolls|deviantart|youtube}}
[[Category:People]]
<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0;z-index:2">[[File:Keeglou.png|150px|link=]]</div>
{{timeline|Article of the Now June 11 & 12, [[2022]]|[[Conspiracy Theory]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Wikipedia]]}}

Latest revision as of 03:57, 10 February 2024

Note: this is an article about an Encyclopedia Dramatica user. For more information, please see the appropriate user page. To leave this user a message, please visit their talk page.
THIS PAGE IS BEING WATCHED BY ENEMIES OF THE LULZ.
BEWARE OF BUTTHURT REVISIONISM.
This person has Assburgers Syndrome,
so you can't say anything bad! :-(


Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck.
Keegan Salisbury is an irrelevant lolcow who had long since been milked by the masses.

You can help by finding someone else to pick on, you meen-spirited cyberboolie!

LEARNED TO PLAY NICE

Keegan Salisbury may have learned to play nice with others on the internet.

     Watch this page to find out if they revert to their natural state of being an asshole   (_Y_)

Keegan Salisbury
Born September 15, 2004
Nationality Americunt  
Residence Illinois
Ethnicity White devil
Gender Genderfluid
Sexuality Abrosexual Pervert
Aliases MultiKeegster1, MultiKeegster2, KJS12, TheYtpmaker1000, YTPMaker1000, SourWashingMachine, Imageny, Empty Recycle Bin, xomdjl_, >nul, Keegs, Keegan The YTP Maker, Ksalisb04, godgeeK, Lord Keith, DontThinkAboutIt112, Keegdog, ksal_, ksal., Keegan J.S., Crystal Lake Entrepreneur, Crystal Lake Video Maker, K33G4N, Zeus, z3us, Keegman, ~ Maestro Keegan ~, etc.
Occupation Tard raging at people he hates, fapping to random girls and waifus, and possibly more

Keegan James Salisbury is a severely autistic 20-year-old Internet celebrity turned manchild from Crystal Lake, Illinois with Special Snowflake Syndrome who usually does nothing but sit on his computer and make both YTPs and YTPMVs, threaten people he doesn't like to do dangerous internet acts, cyberstalk people, overreact to the slightest provocations and have autistic meltdowns.

Somehow, he managed to somewhat blend in with his half-assed vigilante campaigns and DDoSing (despite getting hacked in return as well). This train of spergery ended after it was revealed he was abusive towards Kylie (who would become one of his exes), and Keegan's world came crashing down upon him. After he got caught abusing Kylie, Keegan started degrading her at the speed of light. Keegan got butthurt over people rightfully calling out his perverted lard-ass and formed a new community out of his based ex-friends' cringe enemies to form an entire battalion of mental lolcows squirting lulzy milk 24/7. This retard was previously mentioned on another page that was originally removed because he reported it and claimed it was "bullying him and invading his privacy". To be fair, he was just a whiny 9-year-old back then, but now he became a fat 20-year-old autistic pansexual who hasn't learned from his mistakes.

The Beginning

I came here to fuck bitches.
Ironically, this image was used from his previous ED article from when he was a retarded 9-year-old. The Blossom plush would make him a future manchild.

On September 15, 2004, Karrie Flannigan/Salisbury/Ploman shat Keegan out of her vagina and bought him into the world. At a young age, Keegan was diagnosed with Ass Burgers and would constantly cry over the dumbest shit imaginable, throw temper tantrums and trash the house whenever he got mad - but his parents always excused it because of MUH AUTISM. Keegan's fucktarded parents made the extra effort to spoil his severely autistic ass and shower him with love that wasn't deserved. They bought all the toys, games, and electronics for his sorry lard-ass yet Keegan always behaved poorly. As Keegan started growing up and started puberty, he slowly morphed into a faggot who looks like a typically registered sex offender combined with Chris-Chan along with getting severe acne and a pedostache. Keegan also got violent mood swings once turning into a teenager, replacing the simple tantrums he had as a kid. Keegan admitted to beating up his parents and calling them niggers. Sometime in about 2010, Keegan got his first social media account, named either MultiKeegster, MultiKeegster1, or 2.

Keegan reviews the American Eagle

Cute kid, right? It's sad he turned out to be the revulsion he is today.

I'M PLAYING ANGRY BIRDS FOR GOOGLE CHROME!!

On October 19, 2012, Keegan did a gameplay video of Angry Birds on Google Chrome. At one part in the original video, he told his mom to be quiet and that he's currently making a gameplay video for it. After his mom walked out, Keegan started failing hard in the game and started to rage in his retarded midget kid voice. That moment was so funny that the original video he uploaded got memed to death in the comments section. Because Keegan can no longer access his old YT channel, it would stay there forever and Keegan can forever bask in the shame this video has bought upon him.


4:10 is when the real fun begins. Skip to it for the best experience.

Keegan's Family

An ordinary day in the Salisbury household.
Keegan's momma's half-assed attempt at defending her son.

Keegan's family also tends to be just as spergy and lulzy as the autistic son they have, which is likely a reason for how Keegan is this utterly fucktarded and autistic. They are Ian Sumran Salisbury (daddy) and Karrie Lynn Salisbury/Ploman/Dactyl Flannigan (momma) and all they do is white knight their son online while making fools out of themselves online by associating with random Autism Pride groups on Facebook and posting cringeworthy posts on social media, especially Shitter. Mental retardation and terminal autism sure run in their family. Keegan also likes beating up his parents, especially his mommy when he gets butthurt, hurling his flabby fists at them, screeching like a madman and calling them niggers and faggots. Ironically, Keegan gets butthurt when people say nigger, which shows how much of a hypocrite he is.

People remain shocked to this day that Keegan's parents still defend him, especially his bitch-cunt whore of a mother who still defends him to death even when getting ratioed on Twitter and getting beaten up and unfollowed by her very own unappreciative, spastic abusive son. Keegan's violent spergouts are easily just as destructive as Joey The Autist's, thus giving Keegan the new nickname of "Keegan the Autist", which is very accurate due to just how bloodthirsty, sadistic, and spergy he truly is. If Karrie and Ian truly had brains, they would've simply sent Keegan for adoption or even better, booked him for life into a mental hospital or asylum due to his sheer spergery making him beyond any form of repair.

It should also be worth noting that according to a story that Keegan once told, Karrie tried to stab Ian with a knife in 2016 and was charged with domestic battery. Nobody knows what happened, but knowing how batshit insane his family is, that sounds accurate enough to have happened.

Rumor also has it that Keegan claimed to Kylie that his own mom was in a relationship with an abusive rapist musician known to most as Marilyn Manson. Nobody knows for sure if this was true or not, but knowing how delusional his slut of a mother is, it was likely all made up.

The pictures below show some of Keegan's family's chimping out on social media, mainly Twitter...
Parental Abuse About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]
How to exorcise a demon from a Furby

You have to feel bad for his husband in this marriage, cause the wife is performing black magic on their son's Furby because she's a schizo, how sad.

Keegan's Sex Slaves

Typical Keegan Stan
Autism.
DO NOT WANT
What the average Keegan simp does daily.

The following faggots listed below are Keegan's new squad of sex slaves best friends and fuckbuddies that are also fellow losers like he is. After he was ousted, most of his original friend group left him, so Keegan decided to rally their enemies together to form an entire army of fucktarded and mentally-impaired morons. When all of them are combined, they can easily walk into a museum and make themselves an exhibit, thus forming a Hall of Lolcows.

  •  Isaac71908660 (Powerword: Jeremy Isaac Scott Anthony) - A baby-faced crybaby that loves throwing tantrums on camera like a pussy while supporting RJ Kumar to no end. He's also known for constantly being aroused with a group full of mostly nothing but GoFags and logotards called the Powerhouse of Entertainment (POE) to the point of milking the group to death and always wanting to come back to it every time people there would ban his ass. Ironically, the group was founded by SLN! Media Group (Powerword: Lamont Meeks), someone who's a 25-year old logofag pedophile nigger who was also mentioned on another ED page. HE WANTS FUCKING LOVE!!!!
  • Johnqpublic2990 - Some random faggot that vandalized the page over and over for their lord and savior Keegan when in reality Keegan won't fuck them with his microcock. It may have been Keegan's school's IT Assistant, making this even funnier.
  •  LewmioA (Powerword: Chance Tucker Sims) - This shit-stained, cum-greased lint roller treated Ky like fucking shit and would complain nonstop while ignoring everyone else. He also defamed Baby Lamb Creations all for attention and his daddy made him do push-ups as a result. Now that his former friends hated him, he had no choice but to crawl back to Xomdjl_ like a massive pussy along with the fact that Geoshea was completely obliterated off the web. Also, he hates Madness Combat as apparently, the fandom treated him like shit.
  •  JustAFan2005 - A chronically rude, backstabbing psychopath from Texas and New York (why the fuck would you live in two American cities far away) with severe buttsex addiction crippling him, especially when he does get to suck Isaac's Weiner.
  •  Melsbacksfriend (Powerword: Benjamin Mickle) - A furry aspie with a creepy obsession with Vaporeon. He also happens to be one of his real-life fuckbuddies. He also did a response video to the earlier version of this article about his gay fuckbuddy Keegan. This retard also thinks Pokemon is real and is working on a program device thing to make his Vapereon sexual dreams a reality. and likes to use same the most liberal tag on every social media site which is fur fag gay equivalent to BLM called Furries Lives Matter. And just like your run of the mile zoo manchild who's also a furry manchild, this retard works a Chuck E. Cheese, which is the birthing grounds for gay furry autistic retards like him. He also made cheap Chinese fursuit of his precious Vapoeron, which looks like it was made by manchild that became a serial killer and keeps 5-year-old girls in his parent's basement.
  •  RjGunner111 - A crazy curry nigger from Wisconsin with a massive boner for gaming. In the summer of 2020, he had beef with CodeLyokoFan2002 (Powerword: Roszina Head), a Bri'ish 22-year-old cartoon sperg and womanchild who runs a Discord server called "Tell Us About It", or "TUAI" for short, which is dedicated to massive amounts of spergery over various topics, even hosting movie nights featuring heavily obscure animated movies, and also being subject to a shit ton of raids performed mostly by 13-year-old JoJo's Bizarre Adventure fans alongside the curry nigger himself, and in response to the beef he signed up for several mailing lists and pornography websites using her e-mail. Ironically, he did the same shit towards Keegan as well back in summer 2020 before Keegan got back to him. He enjoys having gay buttsex orgies together with Isaac and Seth. Oddly enough Roszina finally got her own reputation ruined after her 24-year-old now ex-BF from Missouri named Duncan Burden broke up with her sorry ass.
  •  Sonohara - A greasy and disgusting backstabbing MtF tranny who makes shitty music and still gets into drama despite being a self-proclaimed professional musician. She is a manipulative asshat who was a complete bitch to the people at Joey's Pub. She also backstabbed one of her friends just to be a part of Keegan’s cult.
  • Bugboyb - Some autistic pansexual poly grown man with an "UwU" attitude that Keegan met in the other server he got kicked out of, Lustiverse Sanctuary. They were fuckbuddies who often took advantage of each other's OCs and especially his "Victor" OC for ERPs. Because of his interactions with a minor like this, we suspect he could potentially be a pedophile.
  • Engelbash (Powerword: Logan Michael Swan) - This fucktard is a bratty, butthurt, blood-lusting, terminally autistic, homophobic, racist, retarded, vicious and mental sped with pedophilic and zoophilic tendencies who is obsessed with blowing bubblegum and making huge bubbles. He also loves disgusting snot bubbles like Carl Wheezer from Jimmy Neutron's one, bunnies such as the Pink Berets from Despicable Me, Peter Rabbit, Cottontail, the Rabbids from the Rayman franchise, Invader Zim, Fanboy and Chum Chum, Jimmy Neutron, My Life as a Teenage Robot and many more shitty TV series, mainly from Nickelodeon. He spends all day in his shitty Discord server tard-raging about shit no one cares about, having idiotic roleplays where he rps as users he hates and uses his "Geo Guy" and "Evil Larry" tuppers to spam the word "nigger" and use @everyone pings to annoy the hell out of everyone. He also likes making fun of 9/11, fapping to child porn all day, and generally being a sick fuck that is completely mental and retarded. This freak also has an army of goons that love spamming the shit out of others on multiple platforms or inviting them to troll group chats. During Keegan's involvement with the Meming Crew, back when he and Logan were enemies, he made multiple attempts to get in contact with Logan's mom, with most attempts being successful. The first time, it led to Logan's laptop getting taken away by his mom. He has done it multiple times since the last time he did so being when Logan was last seen saying "nigger" on Discord. Too bad Keegan ended up turning into the fucktard he desperately avoided trying to turn into. Did we also forget to mention that Engel himself is fuckbuddies with Seunghwan Lee? Today, Keegan and Logan have pretty much-become fuckbuddies again.

Salty Tears


Benjamin Mickle's Autism: PART ONE

Logan Swan's third triplet brother wants love.

As stated in this sex slaves section of this article, his furry friend Melsbacksfriend ranted about the page of his autistic friend and basically went on retard rant about this site mocking his in real life friend Keegan and ED mocking his obsession with Pokemon, which is the most manchild-ist game series typically loved by these severely autistic types, like...Chris-Chan. Being a DecomcRAT and liberal piece of shit, he decided to put Furry Lives Matter as fucking tag of this video. Speaking of furries, the retard ranted about the furries page as well. along with getting butthurt over the Ass Burgers and Pokémon pages, although this website is all satire. Now, you can tell this retard is as retarded as his friend Keegan when he rants about the site too. His microphone is also fucking terrible, or it's just his severe autism hindering his voice as it happens in many autists as well. And as for the fucktard on the right, that is Isaac and his infamous I WANT LOVE!!! video.

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Keegan's Enemies

Some of Keegan's enemies regularly use this.
The resemblance is uncanny.

While Keegan has a roving band of fucktards that obey his every command due to being fellow outcasts like he is, Keegan has also made a shit ton of enemies due to his constant spergery and terrible attitude. Because he has so many enemies, we had to make a separate page for his enemies.

Moar info: Keegan Salisbury/Enemies.

Taking in Constructive Criticism

   
 
THESE PEOPLE ARE PROVING EXACTLY WHY I DON'T DESERVE TO LIVE. IF I WASN'T SUCH A PUSSY I WOULD HAVE ACTUALLY GONE FOR IT. I'VE BEEN TRYING TO WORK ON MYSELF, BUT THESE MOTHERFUCKERS DON'T EVEN REALIZE IT AND THEY JUST COMPLETELY DISREGARD IT. INSTEAD ALL I GET IN RETURN IS "I'M SORRY DOZZY, FORGIVE ME!", "YOU! WILL! GET! PERMABANNED!" AND "BE QUIET MOM, I'M MAKING A VIDEO FOR PLAYING ANGRY BIRDS FOR GOOGLE CHROME, JESUS CHRIST!"
 

 
 

Accurate depiction of Keegan responding to criticism.
Long lost brother?

Typical to a person with Ass Burgers, Keegan is incapable of taking in any sort of criticism whatsoever, even pussy faggot constructive criticism. Anger him one slight bit or trigger his "PTSD" with any one of the thousands of triggers that will make him go berserk and trigger an autistic meltdown from him and BOOM!, he spergs out like a mad dog infected with rabies. If on the computer, he'll immediately block and permaban you like a control freak and Reddit moderator (only if he has dem sweet mod perms), and if IRL, he will hurl his flabby fists at you and try killing you in a fit of tard rage. Keegan often claims that he can take criticism but this has been not the case many times, probably for every time; but he will never face the truth due to being too much of a coward. All Keegan wants is to live in a perpetual ass-kissing 24/7 hugbox where all his waifus like Kani Maki and Starfire will come to life and have BDSM gangbangs together in his filthy sex dungeon while braindead children who get their entertainment out of crappy grounded videos constantly shower his cow shit videos with a ton of likes.

How to piss off Keegan

  • Make video remixes of the infamous "permabanned" video - he will of course abuse the DMCA process in an attempt to get it taken down.
  • Compare him to either Chris-Chan, Harvey Weinstein, or Oscar Ferguson, a lolcow who doesn't have an article here.
  • Make fun of him by using any of his older videos, e.g. Angry Birds for Google Chrome
  • Tell him to become an hero - He's considered it before!
  • Bring up his past or current actions
  • Mention anyone from the friend group that "betrayed" him, like Kylie, Garrett, Connor/Domma, and Samuel.
  • Say you ate his waifu's family.
  • Flood his e-mail with spam - This has happened before, only except the curry nigger Rj who was mentioned earlier did it while Keegan was still sucking off of Roszina's massive lady dick. Gunnnar has since become fuckbuddies with him.
  • Make prank calls to his cell phone

Getting Tipped by The Police

Sometime back in February 2018, some 28-year old retarded pinoy pedophile from Canada named HeyItsBowman/BronyMult (Powerword: John Aguilar) tipped that fat fuck to the police. The tip turned out to be successful as later that month, the police contacted Karrie and made her take Keegan down to the police station for questioning. Following this incident, he decided to leave Garrett's Meming Crew (when it was The Raiding Crew) like the pussy he is because of this. His school was even made aware of this by Keegan himself and his family and he said Garrett encouraged him to do all the lulzy shit he did. Bowman later outed himself in October of 2022 for grooming a 15 year old girl in 2018 (keep in mind she's 19 now). He even also threatened to assrape Keegan and murder Keegan's family back in 2016 when he was 11-12 years of age.

He has not learned jackshit from it ever since. Matter of fact, the dipshit got in legal trouble yet again but this time it was because he stalked one of his IRL exes, Chloe. We elaborate on this later on in the article.

ERP with Jai Heart

Some time ago when Keegan was a whiny 8-year-old brat, this fucker fell into the victims of Jai Heart, a gross piece of shit who physically abused his Ex resulting in getting kicked out of the YTP and YTPMV community as well. Jai Heart made a Skype account pretending to be Rainbow Dash and would try to fool Keegan to do ERP with him. This led to Keegan getting kicked off of Skype as Jai and a few of his fuckbuddies sent it over to his dad.

The ERP Jai Heart did to Keegan ultimately lead to Keegan doing ERP with Kylie 10 years later.

You can read the full thread of Keegan’s experience with Jai Heart here.

Keegan's Love Quest

Quick everyone, act like you're scared!
It may be hard to see, but here, Keegan is using his permaban powers to keep his waifu forever.
Schizoposting or truth?

The following list down below is Keegan’s love quest, similar to Chris-Chan, Keegan has had a series where he falls in love with a girl but at one point he fucks up so badly he then goes “depressed mode” and then harasses them. So far, Keegan has failed miserably in all of them, with his latest being his most miserable failure next to Ky as he got rejected by not one, but two fucking girls and one of them is a fucking tranny.

Helen

Sometime in 2016 or 2017, Keegan started his le epic love quest by establishing a relationship with some autistic spic named Helen Cortes. Not much is known about her, but Helen later dumped him after a couple of weeks.

Jeffy-Chan

After Helen failed, Keegan began another relationship, this time with a severely autistic and mentally retarded white devil known as Jeffy-Chan (Powerword: Brianna Hansen). She's known to be aroused with Jeffy faggotory, hence the name. Despite their relationship going on for about 4 years, they barely did jackshit for it. At one time, the retarded snowflake himself went on a date with her to Chuck E. Cheese. The relationship all ended when Keegan found Kylie and started lusting after her, thinking that she would be more willing to fuck him.

Keegan and Ben also have an unfunny inside joke surrounding Jeffy-Chan's supposed "super strict" mother (Powerword: Dina Hansen), where every time someone annoys them or is super strict towards them, one of them says "Shut up, Dina." to that guy. They also simply say "Dina!" whenever something got removed or blocked.

Kylie

Before they dating, Keegan dumped Garrett and started becoming aroused all around her to the point she became his biggest property more than Garrett...

But now, they recently broke up with each other, partially because of his sexually abusive attitude towards her, and partially due to how unstable Kylie was. Fearing that his waifu would leave him forever, Keegan tried to use his permaban powers to bring her back to the server they owned together as well, along with trying to manipulate her into having an erotic roleplay with him while she was babysitting her younger brother, along with buying her lewd clothes on Amazon so Keegan can jack his Twizzler-Esque micropenis to her. After the breakup, Keegan felt very suicidal and developed a pornography addiction due to no longer having a woman to sext and live out his deranged incel fantasies.

Since Keegan has developed an addiction to sex in general and trying to fuck every girl, someone caught Keegan in the act of him becoming a lolicon. Sometimes before the breakup, Keegan and his ex were arguing in the DMs, leading Keegan to use his Angry Birds for Google Chrome and Permaban powers to keep her forever, which resulted in her trying to break up because of how much of a crazy dumbfuck Keegan is, unlike anything that has happened before. This also led to communities such as the YTP and YTPMV, GoAnimate and closing logo communities to exile him from their communities for Keegan's awful behavior, which also led to Keegan getting kicked off of the Wrapper: Offline development team. These messages also reveal Keegan would always talk to her shirtless so he can fap towards her too, which shows how sickening this guy is. It has also been shown that Keegamber Heard would mimic some of Kylie's behaviors online, even copying certain opinions for example.

Keegan has sperged out at Kylie quite a few times, to the point where he has left quite a few voicemails with threatening auras towards her.

Damn, he sperged out pretty hard there!
Dad WILL be called.



Fake apology.
Yet another fake apology.


There was at one point during their “KeegLie” ship that they were gonna meet, with a road trip to New Jersey. Despite Keegan being an SJW Liberal, he is scared of the needle and refused to get the vaccine. This resulted in the road trip getting canceled and Keegan cussing his parents out. Luckily they didn’t meet, otherwise, Kylie herself would’ve been raped. That is the sad truth.

Garrett Simmers

Formerly longtime best friends with him, up until recently. Keegan tried going polyamorous with him and Kylie together only to call it quits after like a few hours due to some of Nancer's fuckbuddies canceling him over it, as well as him finally starting to extremely fear the dick he so claims to crave, but fears due to being straight as a ruler and not the Leaning Tower of Piza. There's a very outdated article on this man with the only accurate info being shit people have known for half a decade. Garrett has since become a redeemed lolcow, much like SammyClassicSonicFan, but the same can't be said for the other fucktards listed here, and especially Keegan himself.

Chloe

Just some girl no one gives a fuck about who was at Keegan's school, other than that not much is known about her. There is a possibility that they may have had sex and Keegan Cosby bragged about getting kissed and having sex with her behind the back of the car with a condom on. However knowing Keegan, he most likely didn't fuck her and was simply saying this after a Mommadomma-induced schizophrenic episode or simply trying to spite some of his enemies. Any Chloe that dated him has already broken up with him so Keegan might as well call it quits.

Not too long ago, Keegan got into a heated argument with Chloe, even going as far as to rage in ALL CAPS at her. The gallery below shows the infamous battle of spergery between the 2.

Keegan vs. Chloe About missing Pics
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However, they eventually got along again after what happened. Keegan does seem to be spending a lot of time with her IRL lately and has claimed that he was fine with just being friends with her. According to a third party who has been keeping an active eye on Keegan, they eventually split apart again following another argument that happened without any sort of reasoning.

Between April and June of 2022, it was shown that Keegan abused and groomed Chloe the same way he abused Kylie. He used multiple burners Snapchat and SMS accounts to threaten her with violence and went as far as to leak her lewd (but censored) and dox on a burner TikTok account, likely because the fat fuck himself was still pissed that Chloe rightfully cut him off. One of the most serious allegations made by Chloe against Keegan was that he and his friends made threats of gang rape on her voice mail and that he tried to come to Chloe's house to inflict harm upon her. Initially, he denied doing those, but knowing his nature he very likely lied about it and is trying to look innocent and cover up the fact that he made the poor girl fear for her life.

Total Restraining Order About missing Pics
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Kaylie

There's no info about her other than the fact that she told Keegan to stop talking to her after Keegan constantly begged her for favors Quinton Reviews-style on his school Gmail.

Sammi and Zuzu

EPIC FAIL
LOL

After repeated fail with many of his previous waifus he was planning to molest and fap to all day, Keegan thought going poly would be a good idea and later tried hooking up with random girls from other servers. He first found Sammi, a 19-year-old tranny from Canada whom he immediately fell in love with as s(he)? shared similar interests with him along with being an autist as well. Later, Keegan met a new girl named Zuzu who is a 16-year-old girl, and lived to hear him. Keegan says both have similar interests to him, though it was likely that Keegan was simply pulling shit out of his ass and trying to fake his interests as he was so desperate to get a girl and love.

Keegan started bragging about it on Twitter, but then Zuzu decided to "randomly" break up with him, even though it was more likely she just realized how nasty Keegan is in general, or thought his IRL face is ugly (it is). Keegan said it wouldn't affect him, yet he was most likely seething hard in secret. Then Sammi the Tranny decided to break up with him as demonstrated in the picture on the right! Keegan again tried coping but instead seethed so hard he shed a thousand tears on that day.

Arika Warzynski

Not much is known about her other than the fact that Keegan said on Facebook briefly that he was taken by her and also the fact that she is a 21-year-old weeb womanchild and stalker who graduated from Keegan's school. Keegan foolishly did not hesitate to tell others about his experience with her, but little did he know he was dating a possible pedophile and lolcow. The stories Keegan has told involve Arika taking random photos of current students from Keegan's school she supposedly "had a crush on" online, putting them in FaceApp, and using the genderswap feature, printing out the resulting image onto big, laminated paper at the FedEx place and pretending they're real people, even going as far as to make up whole stories, personalities and everything about them. She also carries around a plush of a Sailor Moon character out in public, much like Matthew Davis with Morgana from Persona 5. Keegan has also stated before that she pretends to be multiple people and channels it through certain items, such as the shit she prints out at FedEx. Eventually one day, Arika randomly broke up with Keegan after just a couple of days. They continued to be friends up until recently when Keegan's school's social worker told him that he has to cut Arika off, which he ended up doing. Arika has kept a low profile online and has only been known to do lulzy shit IRL, according to the stories Keegan has told.

The Lovesick Autist About missing Pics
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Keegan's "Art" and Cartoon Spergery

Keegan's permastation
I swear, his art looks like if both Rick and Morty and The Simpsons animators took acid and bath salts.

Like many other autistic speds trying out drawing to be like the cartoonists they revere as literal gods, Keegan has tried making art before as an addition to his shitty YTPs and YTPMVs. Keegan so far has proven to be incapable of making any sort of quality work at all, with the best drawings he can muster being nothing more than sloppily-drawn shitstains on a huge pile of garbage. After being rightfully mocked for making various garbage or self-indulgent porn of his waifu, Keegan closed down his ImagenyDoesZeArt account like a pussy. After he was busted for abusing Kylie, Keegan got even more hate comments on his DA. For some odd reason, Keegan kept these comments up despite ghosting on this account sometimes.

Keegan also has an obsession with many cartoons, such as Teen Titans, Sushi Pack, Super Robot Monkey Team Hyperforce Go!, along with some animes, and more. Most show that Keegan likes either having him "Kinning" a character or making one of the female characters in the cartoon/anime one of his many waifus; he often does both at the same time and will ship his self-insert or kin with one of his waifu. Keegan also requested many Rule 34 artists to draw porn of Kani Maki, the crab sushi thing from the shitty show Sushi Pack even though he was underage, which potentially got a fuckton of people in trouble. That not only shows how perverted this submoronic imbecile is but also how much of an inconsiderate fucktard who doesn't give two midget shits about others he is.

Don't let that poor grammar fool you, this sounds like something Keegan would say.
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{{{5}}}

Keegan's Waifuism

Sushi Pack is trash.
More self-shipping autism.
BREAKING NEWS!!
Apparently Keegan's no longer a waifuist, as evident by some of his older TikToks. He even beat up the Kani doll.

Being the self-serving and egotistical prick he is, Keegan is a certified waifuist who thinks that he can talk to cartoon characters from a digital screen despite it being completely impossible. Keegan likes licking cartoon screens and going on random waifu subreddits where he proclaims his love for cartoon characters has taken a liking, such as Starfire, and of course, Kani Maki that retarded TOMBOY pink crab he whacks his microcock off to the most.

Keegan proclaims himself to be a self-shipper, which is a short form of an autistic or bipolar shut-in that has spent too much time watching cartoons and/or anime in their basement that gets obsessed with one character and spergs out when someone else finds the character attractive or thinks they're bad/annoying or simply dislikes them. Self-shippers are most often severely autistic and automatic lolcows online, and Keegan is no exception, especially when considering the other lolcow traits he has, such as Angry Birds for Google Chrome and PERMABANNING!!!1

Shit he likes

Proof that he wasted quite a bit of money on her like a simp would do. Notice how he foolishly left his MasterCard and Kylie's address uncensored.
  • Being a part of LGBT community - Yet, the motherfucker has never had a boyfriend, Keegan is just addicted to the clout like any typical Twitter addict so he fakes being LGBT for dem brownie points.
  • Beavis and Butt-head - Has its own page. Both the main characters are fucking retarded, which is what Keegan is.
  • Care Bears - Specifically, the 2000s cartoon no one cares about. A crowd-pleaser with manchildren, which are exactly his type.
  • Cats - Surprisingly, the retard isn't a fucking furry even though he likes cats, though the possibility of him being a zoophile isn't out of the question.
  • Clone High - A failed MTV cartoon from hasbeens Phil Lord and Chris Miller that managed to cause a hunger strike in India. Keegan enjoys fapping to the goth chick Joan of Arc.
  • Closing logos - Like any other autist, he specializes in collecting closing logos. He wants to catch his eyes on that fucking TAT Communications Company logo and have anal sex with it once, no wonder he fucking called Sony over finding the logo.
  • Codename: Kids Next Door - A 2000s cartoon about kids rebelling against adults. There's a lot of naked kids in it, which gives Keegan a lot of fap material. He especially loves Numbuh 3.
  • davemadson - A washed-up 60-year-old YouTuber that creates Speakonia videos involving logos. Keegan has an interest in his "work", and has managed to create similar work in the past.
  • Empire Today - See "Gracie Films". This is another company about improving houses that Keegan likes to cream his pants over. Their phone number is also his personal forced meme.
  • Vyond - The community is filled to the brim with autists who make grounded videos out of characters from baby shows. Keegan being both an unfunny and untalented Vyond Video Maker along with being an abuser makes him idolized by this garbage community.
  • Gracie Films - Just like Erik Mokracek and your stereotypical autist, Keegan has an unhealthy fetish for company logos. He also has a forced meme of it based around its YouTube uploaders.
  • Homestar Runner - Not much is known about it other than the fact Keegan's been a fan of it since 2011 and often uses it as a source in his shitty YTPMVs.
  • Luna Carpet - His secondary forced meme, with the same exact premise. See "Empire Today".
  • Monster Allergy - Keegan has a massive boner for Elena Potato, and tried to justify his ship by noting the lack of playgrounds in their school.
  • Oban Star Racers - IGPX for cheese-eating surrender monkeys.
  • Sam and Max - Keegan likes this game and sees himself as Max, the hyperactive trigger-happy rabbit "thing". Accurate as Keegan would one day get a high score at a school Adam Lanza-style.
  • Super Robot Monkey Team Hyperforce Go! - A Wapanese cartoon pulled out of Disney's asshole that got cancelled after two seasons. Keegan likes fapping to Nova for the tomboy's sake.
  • Sushi Pack - Perhaps his biggest source of fap material yet. Think Powerpuff Girls mixed with Fighting Foodons. His waifu has her headline.
  • The Simpsons - Has its own page. He loves it with a capital L, mainly because it's where that logo he likes to fap to mainly shows up. He claims to have been a long-time fan of this show.
  • The Powerpuff Girls - He used to love this show as a kid, fucking hell he even had a plush of Blossom from the PPG.
  • Tom Karlsson - A random Swede from YouTube that managed to catch his attention by...A Gracie Films video. Every day, he worships him like fucking God. Knowing his autism, it's not that new, since it's also a forced meme.
  • Tomboys - He's a fucking incel who slides into butch lesbians' DMs only to be met with disappointment by realizing they're taken.
  • Totally Spies - Pronz, pronz, pronz! The show is also nothing but glorified fetishes put on the air for some godforsaken reason which is why Keegan likes it a lot, due to being a massive pervert with a tomboy fetish.
  • Wayside - Another Canadian cartoon from the 2000's he spergs over. He likes fapping to the love-crazy dyke bitch Mauricia, and would even sexualize the girls from the show.
  • YTPMV - Stuff he specializes in making on Sony Vegas and REAPER. They usually suck, with loads of unnecessary plugins and VSTs by shoving them into his throat, heck, the community wouldn’t even let him back in!

History of known "waifus"

  • Rainbow Dash - Specifically, the one from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. May have possibly been Keegan's first one, dating way back to mid-2013. Once ERPed with someone on Skype pretending to be Rainbow Dash around that same period.

As of writing, Keegan has not shown any signs of waifuism and has likely left it behind. Good progress, but you're still a fucking retard.

Keegan's Tard Rage

Send this in Keegan's DMs for maximum lulz
Keegan's average reaction to shit he hates.

While Keegan is known to have an intense lust for many things, he also fucking hates many others as well. Like Lewmio/Lenny the Lint Roller's extreme hateboner for Madness Combat all because he pissed off its fandom for being an insufferable asswipe, Keegan has a blazing hatred for many other things, most notably Battle For Dream Island and his lack of trust in the 2 rice nigger brothers who created the show. Keegan doesn't just type out massive TL;DR rants on how much he hates the show, but sometimes even draws cringeworthy hate art of them to vent his tard rage.

Hate Boners

  • Battle for Dream Island - Formerly one of his all-time favorites, this would eventually become Keegan's #1 most hated show of all time, to the point where this enby sex offender almost forced everyone, including Kylie, to hate BFDI. This made a fuck ton of people pissed off, however, they couldn't stand up to it at that time or else he would bring down his dreaded PERMABAN POWERS. He claims to have been good friends with Michael Huang, however being the autistic little faggot that he is, he silently cut him off and assumed that BFDI ruined Kylie when in reality, it was the death of a loved one which made her not feel right for a while. There is just one exception to this, however; Kylie often thought that she was actually Bubble and planned to become an hero if Bubble ever got eliminated from any of the current seasons of the show.
  • Bluey - A random Australian Down Under baby show that pedophiles and babyfurs concerningly obsess over, which of course had to give Keegan "PTSD". This was the start of when Keegan made a forbidden media list where he would show his hate boners to various shows. Hazbin Hotel on his DNI when?
  • Medical Needles/Syringes/Vaccines - Although Karrie and Ian are Democrats, Keegan instead became an anti-vaxxer, and is very terrified of the vaccine due to them giving him a "Sensory Overload". Keegan once threw a tantrum all because his liberal momma wanted him to get vaxxed when he was too fucking terrified to get the needle. The result of his not getting the vaccine led to his road trip to New Jersey to meet Kylie getting canceled and then Keegan calling his parents Niggers.
  • Pretty Cure - Some girly anime for babies that plenty of Geoshea white knights such as pmpkunhunii, OisinFan62, and MikeP regularly whack off too while Kylie is a fan of it. Because of some pedo known as CureLovelyWarrior who groomed Ky, Keegan got so fucked-up and began hating it to death. He only hated it more after breaking up with Kylie, showing how easily shit gets ruined for him.
  • Shaving His Face - Keegan hates cleaning his rancid facial hair and is too cowardly to use a fucking shaver so he has developed all sorts of disgusting beards and mustaches if they can even qualify as proper ones. Keegan has developed a pedo-stache thanks to his fear of razors and shavers. He claims that he "likes his mustache and beard" when in reality, you're not gonna get any pussy with that much facial hair. Learn to fucking shave!
  • Soft/Quiet Rooms - Whenever Keegan starts chimping out at his shitty school, he would be promptly tard wrangled by the strongest teachers or staff members in the faculty and then hauled into a soft room where he is free to cry like a little baby. This has led to him developing severe PTSD in these rooms and thus has become extremely paranoid to not sperg out in public so he won't get sent there again. So far, Keegan has failed miserably.
  • The Mr. Men Show - A childish Bri'ish-'Murican cartoon that some of Keegan's enemies such as WaRnEr and Kylie have taken a liking to. It was enough for Keegan to get PTSD from it, to the point where he actually ruined the Little Miss Sunshine plush Kylie gave him over a year ago.
  • The Owl House - Basically a generic-as-fuck gay Harry Potter that some of Keegan's enemies such as Gemaconda and Garrett have taken a liking to, and apparently it was enough for Keegan to get PTSD from it, even though it's most likely his terminal autism.
  • Madoka Magica - Another magical girl anime with a lonely dumbfuck name Madoka who's super gay for Homura, as well as having Mami Tomoe with big titties, and Morning Rescue. Keegan took a liking to it cause of his ex-girlfriend and a former friend of his for the clout and when both dumped him, he started hating it to death.

Keegan's Shitty Shows and Movies

Sometime in about 2014, Keegan started making his own shows, and movies, he gives Geoshea's own media and Chris-Chan's Sonichu and CWCVille comics a run out of their money for his content. Prior to the ones listed below, Keegan planned shows that never happened which had nothing but intros, outros, and closing credits, many of which were Greeny Phatom-like.

iDog and Furby

When Keegan was just a bumbling young faggot in 2014, he wanted to create a TV show. What was it about? A Furby and an iDog living together in their house. He never made a single episode of it, because his Daddy believed the house was too dirty.

Instead, all there was is a shitty intro, credits, and gay-ass closing logos, which ended up much like The Cowabunga Brothers' closing logos especially with a fuck ton of real-life companies that didn't even work on it.

Keegan's Film of Funny and Awesome

With IDog and Furby having never been made, what's a sperg like Keegan to do? In 2016, he created a Greeny Phatom ripoff where an INTERNET HATE MACHINE goes to steal a Danny Phantom action figure and his group of self-inserted morons has to stop him or some other retarded shit like that and has managed to beat up a teacher just so his autism can be completed. It has been a subject of lulz between a group of people for a while. Currently, he claims it "jeopardized his mental health", the exact same claim Kylie used in one of her ventings fits about how much she "regrets" making Bubble vs. Boohbah, another shitty Vyond series made around a similar time period as this movie of absolute pure faggotry.

Spinners Entertainment

Later in 2017 (or so to believe), he created an autistic entertainment company where he can show off his spergery to the world. It, unfortunately, has nothing to do with Meatspin, but however, he has a show involving fidget spinners in it. The shows he created for it include:

  • Quick Domino Obstacle - Exactly what it is. A series of retarded domino tricks with the help of a canned audience and his real-life friends. Legend says he also used it to exploit the death of Kylie's mother, as seen on the "live" special. Keegan has claimed before it was meant to be "the Family Guy to The Section Domino's Simpsons", which is also a series of domino tricks with a canned audience created by fellow Aussie cunt TEP Productions/Nc3 Studios (Powerword: Noah Gunter), only except it came before this shitshow, therefore making it a complete ripoff of Noah's work. However, as evident by the soundtrack in some more recent The Section Domino "episodes", Noah surprisingly endorsed it and even made playlists for all the Spinners Entertainment series. However, he later deleted the playlists, likely because he found out about the incident between Keegan and Kylie.
  • The Amazing Marble Race - Just real-life Algodoo which rips off some aspects from Total Drama Island. Hosted by the spergin' faggot himself.
  • Welcome To Logo City - Just Keegan acting out with plushies in front of a TV like a manchild, with a videotape playing in the background. Keegan claims it was inspired by "Not A VHS Opening You'd Expect", which is a web series by Taylor Enterprises, another logo sperg and manchild who also makes videos that have a similar aspect to the videos of davemadson.
  • WTTW Chicago Logo Bloopers - Basic logo bloopers spergery, with Keegan's massive raging hard-on for the Sushi Pack mixed in. Not much to write about other than the fact it's just another unimportant davemadson-style series.

Currently baleeted, but you can catch Quick Domino Obstacle and Spinners on his Internet Archive account.

Failed An Hero: what will he do next?

Woah there, buddy! Isn't 17 a bit too young?
PARTY HARD

On September 22, 2021, Keegan would decide to "out" himself when he revealed that he sexually abused Kylie , his (now) ex-girlfriend. At this very moment, everything that Keeganigger has worked his whole life for, many of the sperg circles he was in, and followers all turned on him on that very day. Keegan's old life and glory days were nothing but a distant memory as sexual abuse is considered unforgivable and Keegan having preached against that shit countless times, obviously would have that shit blow up in his greasy face. Keegan's only defender at that time was his retarded mother, who decided to defend him by calling the rage against him "cancel culture", when really it was just a liberal SJW using progressiveness as a shield for his sexual antics having the crowd he cultivated blow up in his face. Reap what you sow, fucking faggot, or just become an hero.

Tons of new shit was later revealed about Keegan, such as him thinking that it's fine for minors to be put in suggestive situations, being nude or wearing skimpy clothes, the fact that he likes hurling his fat fists at his parents and calling them niggers. Keegan claims that a lot of the things he's said in the past (such as the age chart) were copied off of things Kylie and her friends have said but with slight alterations. However, that should not be used to cover up all the other lulzy things he's done. A crapton of screenshots were leaked and Keegan only began tumbling down in a downward spiral. Soon enough, plenty of videos were later made of this autistic buffoon featuring his untimely spergery in all its glory. It has also been revealed that he tried to pressure Ky into performing lewd acts while her 4-year-old brother was still home, yet said that his made-up daughter "Angela" shouldn't be in Kylie's custody or whatever the fuck due to seeing her masturbate. Afterward, he and Mommadomma decided to make fun of her mother's death by saying she fed her too many discos which of course would backfire hard on him. When called out, Keegan just shifted the blame on Domma and kept saying he "changed" and that he was "taking accountability".

While Keegan is going through a crisis, he attempted to get a job, even so, this fag tried to get a manager position at Raising Cane’s in his area, only for them to not accept him in at all. He eventually got a job at a local Mariano's, bagging people's groceries (GROSS!), let's see how long that lasts, oh also, tell the manager at Mariano's we said hi!

Keegan decided to "retire" from YouTube only to come back two weeks later, which resulted in him doing the same shit 3 days later. This has been a recurring thing where Keegan wastes everyone’s fucking time. On the bright side, one can finally know why abortion exists in the first place. Keegan then later made shittily-made cow shit callouts on more of his enemies, calling them some kind of Garrett Cult while making a Cult of his own consisting of assorted fucktards. After several autistic slap fights, Keegan decided to finally retire. He later deleted all the accounts he still had access to and left the ones that are unable to be deleted as dormant, only to come back yet again on YouTube and Twitter after months. He appears to have turned to satirical comedy and has announced the start of a new project, with only 1 video so far. He is also still making YTPMVs that are half-assed, sometimes "mod replaced" and also have too many processing filters on them, yet the YTPMV community wouldn’t even allow him back as he’s just gonna pull the same shit over and over after being exposed. Unlike other YTPMVers like Nex_, Milly, NuzalMan, and CyansWorldCartoon who left the internet after being exposed to being pedos or rapists, Keegan will not fuck off from the internet and continues to waste everyone’s time. To this day, he is still on the internet.

Discovering his page

He even gave somebody this beautiful photo of himself to prove that he's on ED

Shortly after this article was created by Raiden, Keegan discovered his article, and it didn't take long for his white knights began to start vandalizing it. In December 2021, Keegan created a ShitTok of him going full PERMABAN over his article being updated. On February 13, 2022, at approximately 13:50 AM, Keegan created an Encyclopedia Dramatica account called "LolcowWithAnEDAccount", which he used to fuck up his article by adding false information on his enemies and deleting fucking everything, Keegan couldn't redeem himself until his edits getting reverted, and his account getting permabanned.

One month later, it was shown that Keegan created the (now-baleeted) ED article on Kylie (which was plagiarized from this very article), using another ED account called "Lebasedfaggot". With his permaban anger issues, he used this article to doxx her and add false information about her.

Keegan the “Entrepreneur”

It was revealed on April 1, 2022, that Keegan has decided to become a so-called “entrepreneur” in his new YouTube channel, called “Crystal Lake Entrepreneur” (Crystal Lake Video Maker), when the fact that he can’t read a fucking book to learn how to invest into stocks, and building a business, it’s another way to ruin his fucking life and then harasses Kylie and Midori even more. It also happens to be funny that no one supports Keegan’s decision of becoming an entrepreneur. Since his special needs ass is in a special needs class, HE CAN’T EVEN FUCKING READ. Don’t expect him to become famous, he’s fucked up BIG TIME.

His only intention to become a fucking entrepreneur is to try and get forgiveness after being exiled from every community he was on. Oh, he sold the Kani plush, let’s see him spend more money on girls like a fucking simp would do and pull another incident like this in another community. It didn’t even last long for him to give up his entrepreneurial days and then claim to become rich one day by selling shit on eBay. He recently moved back to his main account after the fact that the account failed. Who else knows what he’ll do next?

Giving up

June 20, 2022 - The day when Keeganie Morningstar shat out a video saying that he will be retiring from all of his social media, except for Snapchat and Discord. He probably might be faking this to get sympathy for his fucked up shit from the Kylie to the Chloe eras, and if he does retire, then pat yourself on the fucking back, we won't be hearing from this dipshit anymore.

File:Announcing my retirement (For real this time) (I'm not f**king kidding).webm
Note: This video has audio and contains poor quality, but because Keegan is retarded, you might have to turn your volume all the way up to hear a thing.

HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS

Keegan the Hutt officially returned on his shart stain of a JewTube channel as "Z 3 U S" on July 15th, 2022. This is not surprising in any way, since Keegan is notorious for being a nasty lying pedophilic Aspergic lardass who always BAWWWs about "quitting 4EVAH!!1" and always comes back. Among the first things he did was pass a turd of a video called "PSA". The video's description reeks of his well-known tard rage and Keegalizo Buckzo then spergs Domma, and XenoParadox, and has even threatened to report this page to his school.

 
 
You people are literally fucking braindead, especially if you're coming from the Vyond community. You've been told MULTIPLE TIMES that my ex wants nothing to do with this goofy ahh drama and yet YOU STILL CONTRIBUTE TO IT.

I'm not trying to directly call out anyone from the Hellhole here, as most of the photos seen are just examples of the kind of shit I had to sit through. Matter of fact, not a single one of them has bothered with it for months. If anything, it's those fucking bastards like Domma, Nicholas05 and XenoParadox that are still on about this shit.

The Speakonia shit is just a hobby. I'm not all that interested in the community, especially since there are some very unpleasant faces in the community itself.

Hopefully this video helps somehow.

By the way, once school starts back up I will report that ED article to the school's resource officer, like my social worker has suggested.

You kids are literally fucking pathetic. Go to hell.
 


 

—The video's description. Also good luck, pal.

Hacked and permabanned

He then realized that his account got permabanned after NFT scammers took over his main account.
Kikes try to take advantage of the situation.

On July 24, 2022, a NFT scam by the name of Ark Invest hacked into his main channel, causing it to get suspended; as a result, the over 60% of condensed AIDS and assburgers on JewTube was baleeted along with the channel. Upon discovering this, Don-Keegan Kong had a chimp-out about it and demanded to JewTube that his account gets restored. Also, as expected, he created a new account just to ban evade and posted a video where he explains what happened and states that he is trying to get his old channel back (fat chance).

July 28, 2022, would be the day that he would post yet another retirement video.

As of now, he is still on YouTube under ~Maestro Keegan~ until he got permabanned again.

Involvement in the sugar parent community

Note the "She's only younger by 1 year" and Keegan's need to explain his choice of age out of insecurity.

After his "retirement", he lurked in multiple BDSM/DDLG and sugar parent-related servers typically found on the website DISBOARD.org. His behavior in the BDSM/DDLG servers has been typically described as someone trying to look for a submissive female within his age range, while in the sugar parent servers he is trying to make sales off of "SFW" content he creates himself, mostly thigh, ass, and shirtless pics, alongside shitty Kisekae or Gacha commissions. He was previously in a controversy in the sugaring community after it was discovered he was selling other people's nudes which he found through various MEGA links sent by a 3rd party, but now he is selling his content. This goes to show that Keegan has gone from an internet celebrity who used to be widely respected, to a fatherless damaged e-boy prostitute.

Just recently, this fat fuck was found in the DISBOARD.org server called "Lustiverse Sanctuary", where he was later banned due to usage of a minor character in ERP and sexualization of minor characters as well, in a similar fashion to that of Lamont Meeks and Gabriel Garcia.

Quotes

   
 
For the last time, I am not an abuser. I only abused one person, and I'm not proud of that.


 


 
 

Contradicted himself in just one sentence.

   
 
One day I was off my meds and I acted up, but that was not an excuse. The remark I made about her deceased mother was totally my fault, and I'm sorry for that. To tell the truth, I was kinda peer-pressured by someone into making that remark, but that's not an excuse. I still did the crime and I already paid the price for it.


 


 
 

—Keegan is damage-controlling like a little bitch.

   
 
I'm too scared another horrifying identity crisis and meltdown might happen while I'm gone and I won't be able to handle it


 


 
 

—Keegan is too scared of needles and da "woke vax" despite being a self-proclaimed "Progressive Liberal Leftist SJW", but is also worried that Kylie might have another one of her meltdowns or identity crises while he is gone.

   
 
GUESS WHAT MOM?! THE ROAD TRIP GOT CALLED OFF BECAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENED! I DON'T NEED A RETARDED-ASS VACCINE!!!


 


 
 

—Keegan's response to his momma is shown here: "You'll get the shot or you won't be able to see Ky"

   
 
I've been compared to people like Lewmio and Chris-Chan and honestly it fucking hurts. I can't even do my own things in peace without being reminded of all the horrible things I've done.


 


 
 

—Keegan whining like a pussy.

   
 
BE QUIET MOM I'M MAKING A VIDEO FOR PLAYING ANGRY BIRDS FOR GOOGLE CHROME JESUS CHRIST!


 


 
 

—One of Keegan’s famous quotes that shames him forever.

   
 
I'M SICK AND FUCKING TIRED OF BEING THE COMMUNITY'S FUCKTOY!!!


 


 
 

—Keegan's tard rage.

   
 
KYLIE, THIS IS KEEGAN!!! GET YOUR ASS BACK ON DISCORD RIGHT FUCKING NOW! YOU'RE ON SO MUCH THIN ICE!!!!!


 


 
 

—Keegan is infuriated that Kylie doesn't want to deal with his shit.

   
 
Kylie, this is your final fucking warning! If you don't get on Discord right now and apologize for the shit you said to me, I'm calling dad! Got it?!


 


 
 

—More of Keegan's tard rage. Also sourced from another tard rage voice message.

   
 
He's made me into a fucked up person, and I don't want anybody else to suffer the same fate I did. He's a shitty influence.


 


 
 

—Keegan complaining about Mommadomma. See a pattern?

   
 
I know I'm mentally ill, but it doesn't excuse what I did.


 


 
 

—Keegan always wanting sympathy after he fucks up. How sad.

   
 
YOU, WILL, GET, PERMABANNED!!!!!


 


 
 

—Keegan's most (in)famous quote.

   
 
FUCK THE TROLLS, FUCK THE TROLLS!!!!!!!!!!


 


 
 

—Keegan screaming.

   
 
While I’m a guy that wants to be wealthy, the Entrepreneur aesthetic didn’t seem fitting to me, so I just went with a generic video-maker-type aesthetic. But who knows, maybe I’ll become wealthy someday with all these eBay sales and Fiverr gigs I’m doing.


 


 
 

—Keegan already flushing his “dream” down the drain and then trying to be rich by doing his usual bullshit.

   
 
To be fair I was egged on by someone into making that remark but that's not an excuse. It pissed her off too but she's over it. I already said it once and I'll say it again: she didn't wish for any of the harassment against me. I'm not that kind of guy anymore.


 


 
 

—Keegan wants more sympathy after the YTPMV community threatened him.

   
 
Yeah, Midori wrote that. He disowned everything relating to me, and a lot of the stuff on this doc (aside from the abuse, which I have already taken full accountability for) is heavily unreliable or out of context.


 


 
 

—Keegan here in this quote trying to say that Midori is full of bullshit.

   
 
I ended up having to take down the "Roasting Nicholas05" video because someone (likely Prickolas himself) submitted a false privacy complaint on the video, even though the photo shown was already a public record and technically was not doxxing.

I am unable to mirror this video anywhere else because he'll likely abuse the privacy complaint form on those sites too.

I'm just gonna say it now; the dude's a lost cause. He keeps engaging in harassment against me OTI, accusing me of stalking (when in reality i was just trying to make things right, but you ultimately refused to hear it), made fun of Oscar Ferguson/Zender Man who outside of raging a lot has never done anything to warrant said harassment (and also made fun of his dead mom, that's fucking sick and cruel) and keeps doing edits of people faceswapped with George Floyd, often making "I can't breathe" jokes with the sole intention of making fun of George Floyd's death. He even supports All Lives Matter, which is a racist way to put it and completely disregards the oppression and racism that the African American community has to endure on a day-to-day regular basis.

So yeah, that's all I have to say. Nick, just because Susan Wojcicki managed to suck you off just this once doesn't mean you'll be able to get away with everything anymore. You are a lost cause at this point. You serve zero purpose. You should get off the internet...NOW!
 


 
 

—Keeganie Magne's autistic meltdown on Nicholas for taking down the video that doxxes him (The one that his face used in the Fun Shitposting Wiki article).


Gallery

This gallery below is an artisan archive preserving the finest ragequits, permabannings, Angry Birds for Google Chrome, and waifu whacking off that Keegdoggis here has decided to show the world too. Enjoy faggots!

Sheer, Unfiltered Autism About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Fan Art

People have also decided to create some art of Keegan, especially after he got exposed. Here are they in all their glory!

Art and Memes About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Videos

As with the gallery, here are some parody videos of Keegan or the fat autist being the joke himself.


Keegan's half-assed Logan Paul-styled apology. He even admitted to grabbing Jack/Tom Cat's IP address, lmao.


More Keegan Quotes.


Autistic Screeching. Probably a soon-to-be Friday Night Funkin mod as well.


Another tribute.


Keegan is evolving to his final form! Watch out!


Keegan goes full Justin Bieber.


Ballad of Keegan The Autist.


A meme edit of one of Keegan's latest TikToks.


Another meme edit of one of Keegan's latest TikToks, this time with different audio.

Here is the original video of Keegan raging on camera threatening to permaban people. Go nuts.

Other Videos


Keegan after he drops the soap in prison.

Keegan on TikTok brutally beating the shit out of the Little Miss Sunshine plush Kylie got him once. Honestly surprised he never did this to Kylie herself.

Keegan "ruining" the Little Miss Sunshine plush by drawing and spitting on it. That spit looks like it has the consistency of cum.

More TikTok spergery from Keegan, this time he's beating up the plush doll of his self-proclaimed "ex-waifu". Who would have guessed he'd do this to her too?

Keegan wanting to get people arrested over milking and trolling him. Seriously, that's fucking pathetic.

Keegan expressing his flaming hateboner for his ex Kylie, through this duet on TikTok. The footage on the left ended up getting memed to death by some of Keegan's enemies, replacing the audio with something else.

Keegan being a retarded shit as usual. This was meant to be a failed attempt at copying Verbalase's infamous Tetris Beatbox video.

Keegan and another SPED friend of his. Fun fact, that guy also has the name, Ben, just like one of Keegan's sex slaves!

Trivia

His final evolution. Fuck off and let him be plz.
  • Keegan looks like Chris-Chan and Blake Good.
  • Keegan likes fantasizing about his enemies dying brutal deaths, though it won't happen in a million years.
  • Like every manchild he is, he still enjoys watching GoAnimate videos and making shitty jokes.
  • Keegan enjoys making fun of people's deaths, but then backtracks exactly 5 minutes later afterward like the coward he is.
  • If Keegan doesn't have moderator roles, he'll be unable to PERMABAN and thus will have a mental breakdown.
  • Keegan says he's just exactly like people of color when he's just a white cracker with a girl's hair.
  • Keegan pulled a Chris Chan and attempted to get this page taken down 4 times. He even got his Ass Burgers retard friends and school to try to take it down. Tell the IT guy at Keegan's school that we said hi!
  • He was once the main developer of a BAWWTISTIC version of Vyond called Wrapper Offline (which mainly brings back the old Family Guy theme called Comedy World) and had coding skills on the same level as YandereDev, meaning this retarded rip-off of Vyond would always crash because this retard would blame his meltdowns and mental issues.
  • The characters Keegan sees himself as consist of the retarded salmon from Sushi Pack, Ikura Maki; Max from Sam and Max as well as more, usually to ship himself with the tomboy girl of the show he finds sexy.
  • He once claimed to have bi-shitter disorder, but we all know he's faking it for brownie points like his emo Wicca loving Snorlax-lookin' mama.
  • A former ween and friend of DLE, named Devon Lawler, cracked a joke about Harvey Weinstein towards him on one of Devon's gay ass streams. Though Devon was a 16-year-old lolcow and troll, he foreshadowed Keegan's behavior later on.
  • Keegan and Ben got caught by bus security for reciting that Vaporeon copypasta and he said "THIS IS HIGH SCHOOL, KIDS TALK ABOUT INAPPROPRIATE STUFF ALL THE TIME".
  • Keegan was once banned from YouChew for being under 13.
  • At one point, Karrie wanted to sell this enby retard on craigslist, which could mean she is fed up with his shit.
  • It was once noted that Keegan compared Kylie to Midori, which could mean that Keegan almost could've done the same things to him as Kylie did.
  • It can be inferred that his favorite color is orange cause he’s always wearing that stank-ass orange shirt in most of his content. WASH YOUR FUCKING CLOTHES, YOU JACKASS!!!
  • Keegan was once suspended from school in 2015 for punching a teacher in the face because she didn’t want her to play on the iPad. This could have led to his Angry Birds for Google Chrome and permaban anger issues today.

See Also

Keegan's waifu getting crabforked.
  • Angry Birds - The game he played when telling his mother to be quiet.
  • Autism - Yes, this abuser has assburgers syndrome.
  • BPD - This proves to us that he and his emo mama secretly have attention whore contests in the Salisbury household. He's also the product of TikTok faking disorders and trauma culture.
  • Caillou - The cartoon version of Keegan
  • Camhead - Similar to Keegan except Cam had common sense and left the internet.
  • Chris-Chan - The person he secretly idolizes and looks like him too. Also did similar things to what Chris Chan did as well. Basically, the YTPMV community's Chris Chan.
  • CyansWorldCartoon - Malaysian who acts the same as him, minus the pedo stuff. At least he fucked off, unlike Keegan.
  • Depression - The tool that Keegan uses to gain sympathy and attention.
  • Diogo Mendes - Possible idol?
  • Dying Alone
  • EDP445 - Black Keegan
  • Erik "Tazman" Mokracek - His mentally challenged middle-aged long-lost cousin.
  • Geoshea - Keegan claims to hate him, yet behaves like him. At least Geoshea had some common sense and left the Internet, unlike Keeganigger.
  • Glitchlov - another schizo that acted like him.
  • Greeny Phatom - Keegan has done Greeny Phatom-related stuff especially before.
  • Harvey Weinstein - Like father, like son. If he wants to be a filmmaker, this could accurately be like him all grown up.
  • HeyItsBowman - Pinoy-Canuck manchild who groomed a minor in 2018, Keegan also tried to go full skiddie mode and decided to grab his IP, but failed miserably.
  • Incel - As expected of these Redditor snowflake politically correct Gen-Z TikTok libtards.
  • Joey The Autist - Long lost brother?
  • JustinRPG - Both are known urophiles.
  • MediaFan2008 - A person who acts the same just like him but on a worse scale.
  • Nikocado Avocado - The person who makes his content look good.
  • Pansexual - Ironically, for someone who loves all genders, he seemed to never find a boyfriend or another enby Pedo-fork.
  • Pedo - It's very possible that Keegan could be one.
  • Rape - One thing Keegan would’ve done to Kylie and Chloe if the road trip wasn’t canceled.
  • Teen Titans - The show he used to fap to.
  • The Powerpuff Girls - One of the shows he faps to.
  • Timbox - A challenger approaches!
  • Vyond - The retarded dumbfuck first started in this, yet the community wouldn’t even let him back in!
  • YouTube Poop - Keegan made some in the past, yet like the Vyond community, the community won’t let him in again.
  • YTPMV - The stupid shit Keegan makes yet just like both communities, the community won't accept him in again.

External Links

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Keegan Salisbury is part of a series on Aspies. [Back to your happy placeSperg out]

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Keegan Salisbury is part of a series on Enemies of the Lulz
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Websites

4chon.netAbove Top SecretAnarchy_OnlineAresBlocklandDoutainiencyclopediadramatica.wikiFailcyclopediaFurcadiaFurry PawsGrass_CityHypercubeInkpopLegi0nMyWikiBizPlaneShiftPotterforumsSSOTeenspotThe Anti-Twilight MovementThe YouTube Thomas ClubTwilightSucksWild Wolf SocietyWorld of DarknessY! Japanese AnimeZDaemonZetaforumZuuP

Methods

Press chargesBlank your articleFile a lawsuitFile a DMCABuy a dogHire professionalsAsk people to helpCall the Police

End Result

Kill yourselfHide the EvidenceRagequit

See Also

White KnightingDone with EDFinal solutionFree Speech

Keegan Salisbury is part of a series on Dying Alone

[DeadCry yourself to sleep]

Those Who Have Died Alone

Aaron AlexisAaron BushnellAaron SwartzAdam LanzaAlexis ArquetteAmanda ToddAmy WinehouseAnal CuntAndy KaufmanAngry GrandpaAnna Nicole SmithAnthony WarnerAsa CoonBrian AdamsBrandon CrispByuuCharmaine DragunCho Seung-HuiChris BenoitChris Harper-MercerChynaCodey PorterDavid BowieDavid CarradineDragoneerEazy-EEdaremElliot RodgerElvis PresleyGeorge SodiniGizgizGleb KorablevHappyCabbieHarambeH.P. LovecraftHeath LedgerJake DavisonJeff WeiseJewWarioJim MorrisonKate SpadeKitty0706Kurt CobainLemonade CoyoteLeelah AlcornLil PeepLiloLoki BlackfangLowtaxMia JaninMegan MeierMichael JacksonMitchell HendersonMySpaceNathan GaleNikita LytkinOtoya YamaguchiPekka-Eric AuvinenPrinceRandy StairRehtaeh ParsonsRicardo LopezRina PalenkovaRipperRobin WilliamsRonnie McNuttRudolph ZurickRyan PalmeterShawn WoolleyShayShuaibySol PaisStephen PaddockSteve StephensThomas Matthew CrooksTony48219TooDamnFilthyTyler DumstorfVester FlanaganWilliam AtchisonXXXTentacionZhao Zewei

Those Dying Alone

03bgood2cash2 gryphon7jackass77Adam SandlerAhuviya HarelAIDS SkrillexAkewsticRockRAlex FordAlison RappAmerica's Third PartyAmy SchumerAndrew AllansonAngry JoeAnimatedJamesAnita SarkeesianAnonymous BorgAnthony 'A-Log' LoGattoAntony AguilarApril DavisAquagirlwhitefoxArgent009Arguecat3Arin HansonArmake21AsalieriAsher2500Austin AlexanderAvantGardePonyBambifan101BarneyfagBasement DwellersBen FordBen MoynihanBenny_the_SnakeBenthelooneyBig RedBikerfoxBill9929Bill GaedeBill GatesBLACKbusterCriticBob RehahnBrandontheMovieGuyBrandon SmithBrian MuellerBrian Richard ZaigerBrianna WuBroniesButLovaByAppointmentToCarl the CuckCartoonjunkieCaseydeckerCatboyKamiCheeyevChloe SagalChris-chanChris CrockerChuck M.Clint of Rise and FallCopperCabCorey MargeraCoughlan666CrazyvideosandrantsCrinklemonCyraxxDaniel BrandtDan CilleyDane CookDani FilthDarius McCollumDarknessthecurseDarksydePhilDave ChapelleDave MustaineDavid HockeyDaxflameDBoyWheelerDeekerDeterminedToDrawUTDev-catscratchDGTrixieDiaper BoyDillon CosseyDiogo MendesDisneyFan01DisneyMasterDJ KEEMSTARDnepropetrovsk maniacsDodgerofZionDogpatch PressDon RobertsDoodletonesDoomer3868Dorian_GayDoug WalkerDrakonDrossRotzankDoomentioDustinEDP445Emer PrevostEmosEpic Fat GuyEpicKitty54Eric AbramovEric RidenourErik RibsskogErtasVideosFilthy FrankFagolescentsFanFic CriticFast EddieFat ManFaust & Pory Five Nights at Freddy's fansFlardoxFluffy teh wolfForeverKailynFriends of A-LogFurriesG-ZayGather Against FateGeorge LopezGeosheaGhostGirlvinylGlobelampGoddessMilleniaGraykatGreg MazujianGwen GaleGwen StefaniHarmful OpinionsHellkiller777I Dislike Cis PeopleI Hate EverythingIan Miles CheongIchverboticze⁴rImma-The-DeerInkBunnyIsabella Loretta JankeJamil The KingJessi SlaughterJessica LeedsJim ProfitJINXDROWNEDJoe Crusher PicklesJoekerJohn BullaJohn FieldJohn KricfalusiJohn Patrick RogersJonathan McIntoshJonmonJonTronJoseph CampJoseph8276Joshua "Null" MoonJuggalosJustinRPGKat DenningsKendall JennerKeegan SalisburyKathleen ToddKenny GlennKevin HavensKeffalsKimmo Johan AlmKingEmpoleonKingMasterReviewKrashedLaci GreenLarry the Cable GuyLauren FaustLeafyIsHereLecarickLeigh AlexanderLeisureSuitGamingLena DunhamLeonard F. Shaner Jr.Leslie JonesLifeInATentLikeicareLinkaraLittleCloudLittleKuribohLogo KidsLordelthibarLow Tier GodLucian HodobocM. ChaosA Man in BlackManchildrenMar9122MarblesMarioMario456MariotehplumberMarjan SiklicmasteroogwgayMatthew DavisMatthew NicholsonMcJuggerNuggetsMDetector5‎MeowbarkMeganSpeaksMichael BattonMichael FitzhywelMichael GimsonMike SandyMoleman9000Monica PunkMonkeyGameGuidesMoviebobMumkey JonesMuZemikeMylarBalloonFanMysteriousMrEnterMysticArkNaokoElric2250NawlinWikiNeckbeardsNeoGAFNick BateNick BravoNikkineko333Noah AntwilerNostalgia ChickNotchNullcherriObjectfagsOFWGKTAOnideus Mad HatterOnyx ForepawPacificoceanasiaPaigeGirlPaul FeigPaulie CalafioreParkourdude91Peter BrightPeter CoffinPhantomStrider8Phil FishPhunWithLogicPinkieponyPit ViperPixyteriPeluchin EntertainmentPMRantsPreachingthegospelQuentin TarantinoRachael MacFarlaneRandi HarperRichard ReidRicki RavenRMG ProductionsRobert StaintonRobert Wayne StilesRockosockoRomeo RoseRootbrianRose3212Ryan RouthSad FrogSammyClassicSonicFanSam PepperSarah ButtsSarahisniftySaturnDOSSceptreSchnookumsSegacampSega KidSeth MacFarlaneSethistoShadmanSimply OkamiSlowbeef & DiabetusSnapesnoggerSonic SaviorSonmanicSony-MaeSophie LabelleSpax3StormySuperlisamcbSusan BoyleTara StrongTheAmazingAtheistTheDOSFagTheSockDetectiveTim BuckleyTJ LaneTodd in the ShadowsTom PrestonToonEGuyTourneyfagsTrey Eric SeslerTrigglypuffTyciolTyler GarmanyUlillilliaThe Unknown AutobotVadeVinceintheBayWade FulpWeatherManKevinWesley!!!WoWfan4lifeWwwareaWeegeeisgoingtokillmXenuriaYandereDevYoshiwii1Youyoungbloodfantasy91Zoe QuinnZone

Their Methods

9gagAdventure TimeAn HeroAIDSAnimuAlt-rightArt SchoolA-Log's Fanfictionask.fmAsperger's SyndromeAssigned MaleBath SaltsThe Big Bang TheoryBattle For Dream IslandBlackLivesMatterBlack metalBody PillowsBonziWORLDBitViewBoozeBullyingBuzzFeedChildren's CartoonsClown WorldComputer Science IIICosplayCumOnPrintedPics.ComCupheadDead FriendDeath metalDeath penaltyDating SimsDeviantARTDiscordDrugsEdginessFamily GuyFanFictionFeminismFedoraFidget spinnerThe Filthy Frank ShowFive Nights at Freddy'sFleshlightFriend ZoneFurAffinityFurry ArtFun Shitposting WikiGarry's ModGenshin ImpactGoAnimate!GooglewhackingGorillazGothsGravity FallsGreen DayGreeny PhatomGrindcoreHackingHappy Madison ProductionsHomestuck‎Hover hand‎HufflepuffHigh ScoreIncelcoreIndie musicInfantilismInsane Clown PosseIntrovertInvisible GirlfriendIRCJenkemKiwi FarmsKotakuLeague of LegendsLegoLibertarianismLiveJournalLonelyLoveShyMai WaifuMass ShootingsMen's rights activismMinecraftMLP ForumsMMORPGsMGTOWMUDsMy Little PonyMy Tiny DickNice GuyismNu metalOculus RiftOh ShiternetOnline datingOnline sex gamesOverwatchPlastic CrapPlenty of Fish/r9k/Rick and MortyRobloxRule 34RuneScapeSchool ShootingsSecond LifeSelf-VictimizationShy Boys IRLSilk Screen Goku ShirtSlayerSlipknotSluthateSmogon UniversitySocial JusticeSource FilmmakerSouth ParkSparkalloonSpeakoniaStar vs. the Forces of EvilSteven UniverseTaking the Internet Too SeriouslyTeam Fortress 2That Guy With The GlassesThe Anytown ShowThe EntersphereThe SimsThey Might Be GiantsTomb RaiderToolTransformersTulpasTumblrTV Tropestwenty one pilotsUnchartedUncle GrandpaUncyclopediaUndertaleUnikittyUTTPVidLiiVirginityVirtual YouTubersVloggerheadsWatchMojo.comWeezerWikimaniaWizardchanWorld of WarcraftYIIK: A Post-Modern RPGYouTube

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Distinguished Individuals

03bgood2cashabigblueworldAdezeroaediotAeverine NievesAkai DaliaAngel LocsinA Man in BlackArgent009AsalieriAush0kBill9929Brian MartinChris-chanChrissie BarmoreCircaRigelClayranger89Daniel BrandtDivineAngelDonald Buffkin/TablecowDonny Longdrp1zzaED SingersElizabeth Minami WyvillErin AnthonyFeltchoFlardoxGirlvinylGrace SaundersHayakainIcewillow9Intellectual CheckmateIlovemydoodleJDubsJim ProfitKeegan SalisburyKevin MartinLibertarian FoxLinkaton FuraitoLove ShyLulz in hell TrollfagsLjupco SterievMarjan SiklicMeowbarkMike SandymootNate SpidgewoodOliver D. SmithOnideusPacificoceanasiaPaul FetchPixelBeeProductionsPreachingthegospelPrince JeremyPrinceDumuziPurelilyRobert Wayne StilesRootbrianRusty RaySceptreSheWolfSirius OrionisSpleeNfatSteve Hodder-WattSue BaskoTom NewtonVampiricSpektorVideoGamePhenomVordrakWwwareaYandereDevZenny

Noble Internet Entities

AnontalkAnti-Encyclopedia Dramatica.comConservapediaDeviantARTencyclopediadramatica.wikiFailcyclopediaJosephevers.blogspot.comMetafilterMyAdoptsNamecheapOhInternetRationalWikiRipoff ReportUltraviolet News NetworkUncyclopediaVidLiiWikiFurWikipedia

Glorious Civilizations

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Related Subjects and Methods

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